I haven’t been around the past couple days due to personal reasons. I’ll be back here soon once I get my head a bit straight. I hope you all are well. Here is something I just popped up on Facebook to friends and family there.
Today was tied for the hardest and most cruel day of my life. The other was having to make the decision to put my boy Bandit down 3 1/2 year’s back.
I will write a proper detailed post later about Kitano. This moment I am emotionally drained. My chest is actually heavy and physically hurts to breathe, which is something I have not quite experienced before. Even though I haven’t slept properly in days, I cannot sleep.
I miss Tano more than I could even begin to express. I am haunted by his sudden loss and this entire world is a grimmer place without my perfect boy in it. I feel shattered and lightheaded and can’t break from it. My spirit is simply crushed and will never be the same. This is one of my sons. This is one of my best friends. This is one of my heroes. This is one that will haunt me.
Tano was fine a week ago. He was completely normal. Happy and playful as ever. He was always happy and such a puppy. Even at 13 1/2. Cherish the times with your animals. They are not here nearly long enough. I wish I could get back one of those weeks I was away at a convention just to spend more time with him. I’d give anything. Go and hug and kiss your babies right now as there will be a time that the opportunity will no longer be available.
To those who came with me today, visited me, and most importantly...came to see Tano and visited my boy, that means the world to me. I know it did to him as well. I love each of you. He loved everyone...even he was hiding under the table. He especially loved the kids. He was gentle, clumsy & funny, super clever, and overall...perfect. He was my richest treasure and I am lucky to have found him.
The thing I’ll miss most tonight, is I won’t be getting any kisses. He would shower me with so much love nightly. When I was sad he would cone up to me and lick away my tears. Gross right? Nope. Amazing. Intuitive. Compassionate. He knew how to make people feel better. He wasn’t just a dog. He was a shining example of the pure beauty that exists in this world. The beauty we choose to often overlook, as we are so preoccupied in our everyday normal busy lives. Stop. Take notice folks. They say beauty fades...but his vibrant impact will be felt by those who had the pleasure of meeting him...forever.
I love you Tano. I am truly lost without you and I beg you for some of your strength, as I am in desperate need of some.