first thing i did today was think i overslept. i then realized i need to get a physical clock in my room, probably to the left of my door up by the edge of the frame. i wake up often thinking i overslept but with nothing to do immediately when i wake up. it's really just misplaced something - energy, maybe some anxiety or paranoia, some of which i must admit aren't great things to start the day with. i guess energy is the only thing i would want when waking of those three options. so after the hyperbolic wakeup, i checked my phone for the time because no clock. i had texts, two of which weren't what i hoped they'd be. this is gonna be a long winter. ok, just one time - saying you're too busy to date literally means you don't want to make time for that person. side note, question - because i'm trying to believe that all good things will indeed come in time when i am ready to receive them, is my faith in the universe a bit of a religion? is meditation like prayer? incense an offering? one thing is true - "neu roses (transgressor's song)" by daniel caesar is a dream.