What a beautiful and heart-felt writing. I really appreciate what you say about commitment - and then it can be a dance between distraction & the commitment. Though as you say/ask, 'what's that about?' since distraction can well be avoidance! Perhaps the time you have invested around creating the homestead may be viewed as mediation in action?! You were in manifestation mode?! I think many, if not most of us, return again and again to our various types of meditation or contemplative practices....and are always welcomed deeply back into the mystery. I really enjoyed reading this. Thank You. Happy Reunion!