María, 10 years old, arrives at her classroom with her mother and realizes that the written work she had to deliver that day to the teacher, in front of all classmates, very angry and tells her mother that she is the culprit because mom did not put the work in her school backpack, she began to cry without being able to control herself. María shows in this example a clear intolerance to frustration, because: "negative stress situations, blaming others"
But what do we call low tolerance for frustration in a child?
But what do we call low tolerance for frustration in a child?
Basically, tolerance to frustration in the positive attitude shown by the child in a situation different from what he expected. However, if this attitude is anger or sadness, which does not allow to manage positively to find a solution, it is said that it has low tolerance to frustration. The idea is to learn to tolerate the negative and exaggerated feeling that arises when you do not always get what you want. As it is an attitude, you can work and develop, so it is very important that parents and teachers know how to identify it to teach tools that allow them to tolerate the discomfort caused by frustration.
It is a job not only of parents but also of teachers, since the formation of attitudes considered favorable for the balance of the person and the development of society is one of the objectives of education.
To help children with low tolerance to frustration is very important is always the example in difficult or stressful situations, especially how parents and teachers behave when they see anger, anger or discomfort in the child when they do not get what they he? have you proposed?
It is amazing to observe how parents want to teach the child something that is not shown, an example that is very common that the father or the teacher asks the child not to scream, they say shout: "I told you nooooo yell". The best example will always be the adult, that the child will observe and appreciate how these situations are resolved.
It is very important that parents and teachers identify the cause of the low tolerance to frustration of the child, and that on several occasions the bibliographies consulted agree that it may be due to:
- Low self-esteem.
- They do not know how to lose.
- Be very spoiled and overprotected, always getting what the child wants.
After identifying the causes, you can find solutions more easily for each one.
In addition to setting an example with your attitude in stressful situations, you should also teach the child that making mistakes is an opportunity to learn.
What else can parents and teachers do to help children with low tolerance for frustration?
Be creative in the classroom and at home too, do not satisfy the child's wishes immediately, invent activities that require effort and then reward for this. In this way, the motivation to strive and not always get away with it for the first time, you will have to learn to manage your emotions positively. I encourage my children to breathe calmly and look for the positive part of the situation, what I do since they were little and now I am surprised when I hear the bigger girl recommend that to the youngest.
In this circumstance positive reinforcement is also applied, but how is the child motivated through positive reinforcement?
It is about teaching the child that all behavior has consequences that follow it.
Then we will apply what in psychology is known as the empirical law of effect, textual cites:
"The behavior increases its probability of occurrence due to positive stimuli and reduces its probability of occurrence if it is followed by negative elements for the person (punishments)".
Note: It should be noted that when investigating this law, it is clearly shown that it does apply to the positive reinforcement of a behavior, however, in relation to the punishment it was found that it does not apply to unlearn.
In another publication you can consult more about this law, because it has many defenders and detractors, here I leave a link if you want to learn more about it.
Teach from your children to breathe properly, to meditate, to seek their inner peace, but above all to trust and put in the hands of God the control of our problems.
And how do you help your children or students to handle frustration properly?
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