Emotional fragility has nothing to do with emotional sensitivity. Although we could define the latter as an exceptional quality of the human being, the fragility corresponds mainly to the lack of tools to manage our more complex internal states and a clear difficulty to face the simplest difficulties of daily life ...
Let's focus first on the difference between these two terms, relying on an important fact. We often find people who come to "normalize" their emotional fragility and explain that it is their way of being, understanding and living life. "I am a sensitive person and I can not do anything about it," they say in self-defense.
Emotional fragility often leads to states characterized by anxiety, stress, depression ...
We must understand that from the moment that a behavior / attitude generates only suffering, insecurity and lack of control over our own being, excuses have no value. Not when it prevents us from being happy. Therefore, although sensitive people have a broader vision of society and a better way to connect with their needs and their environment, people with fragility have much more limited emotional perspectives.
What's more, this trait often indicates an underlying problem: depressive disorders, anxiety, emotional mismanagement, etc. Therefore, it is necessary to deepen this dimension a little more.
Emotional Fragility:
causes and characteristics
The American College Health Association published a few years ago an interesting work on emotional fragility. In the latter, they told us that it was a very worrisome fact: our young people suffer more and more depression, stress, emotional dependence and, to make us even more afraid, they think more and more about suicide. Behind this reality hide a clear emotional fragility and a lack of resources before the most usual difficulties.
Most of these psychological dimensions are rooted in educational styles. Families in recent decades are aware that our society requires more and more skills to live there. This has led parents to intensify their efforts to complete the training of their children from a very young age.
They try to put at their disposal the best possible resources to guide them towards success, sometimes forcing them to distinguish themselves and constantly reminding them of how special they are or what they must be to succeed. All this is probably understandable; however, this point of view neglects certain details.
One of the most important details is that they are protected against failure: many children can not tolerate frustration, no matter how small. On the other hand, they find it difficult to learn to decide autonomously, feel insecure about themselves and are very clumsy when handling their own emotions. Little by little, they realize that they are not so "special" in the eyes of others and that they lack the skills, resources and strategies to react to basic problems.
Let's see what characteristics they present to people with emotional fragility.
How can I know if I am an emotionally fragile person?
In addition to the ones we have described, some characteristics that we find in emotionally fragile people are:
Inability to manage and understand emotions such as sadness, anger, disappointment ... The reaction to this is often oversized.
Continuous feeling of emptiness
Feeling of suffocation facing the simplest problems, facing disagreements, facing any circumstance that does not resemble the one we expected or wanted.
Inability to manage frustration
Difficulties to take control of your life, feeling that everything is stronger than us.
Constant problems in social relationships, feeling that all the people around us disappoint us or betray us.
-La lack of energy, apathy, constant melancholy.
Lack of confidence when performing any task, feeling of inefficiency and low self-esteem.
When things are not as we expected, wanted or expected, we could react violently or let ourselves be carried away by anger.
Our emotional health often depends on how well we have been educated and the quality of these early interactions. However, poor education or ineffective education does not determine us. It is always possible to overcome emotional fragility.
Strategies to strengthen the "I" and become emotionally strong people
To understand this process that can turn us into an emotionally strong person, we can visualize, for example, a porcelain cup. We know that it is sensitive, we can even see cracks, marks of its last autumn. However, this porcelain cup is anything but fragile; It is a unique and wonderful piece in terms of its shape, its material and its small imperfections.
Therefore, we can allow ourselves to be sensitive but not be fragile. We can not cross this line and let our whole being break. If we allow this, our identity, our values and our inner beauty will escape. So, how do we get rid of those weaknesses that limit our happiness?
A first step is to become aware of our emotional weaknesses, these gaps that limit us and make us feel bad. Therefore, and curious as it may seem, certain activities have demonstrated the usefulness of artistic therapy or artistic therapy. This is a sensational way to explore our inner thoughts, emotions and knots through colors, canvases and drawings.
A second step is to assume a sense of responsibility towards oneself. Fragile people feel victimized by their environment, society and the people around them. They are limited in their reactions, like a ball that hits a wall and bounces again and again. These people should take control of their lives and define a sense of real and courageous responsibility.
This sense of responsibility requires putting aside past experiences and making changes in the present. Any change is accompanied by a sense of fear, but if we manage to eliminate these stones from our daily path, we will feel more secure. We will become masters of our lives.
To conclude, it is obvious that this process is not simple and sometimes requires the help of a good psychologist. In view of this intrinsic difficulty, let us remember that we all have the capacity to become emotionally stronger people. Let's take care of our porcelain cup so it's unique, strong and beautiful.
