I was listening to an audiobook yesterday that took me on a trip to yesteryears, when I was emotionally challenged. Back when I let other people hold the remote control over my emotions. When I allowed their words, actions, glances, moods, and attitude to determine my emotional state. When my peace, happiness, and self-worth were dependent on their opinions.
I can only laugh about it now that I know better.
It's crazy, but I believe most of us have been through such. All too often, we unconsciously or unintentionally allow people's careless comments, disapproving looks, cold shoulders, or negative attitudes to dictate our day. We take things personally, which results in anxiety and sadness, draining our energy over something that usually doesn't matter.
Thankfully, I have taken back the remote control for myself. It was a tough and slow process, but it is worth it.
Maybe growing older has something to do with it. Over the years, I have learned to prioritize my own emotional peace and joy over other people's noise. I slowly trained myself to set boundaries and stand by them without feeling guilty. Well, there were times when I left my guard down, and others crossed the line. I cried, felt sad, and got upset. All too normal, I think. But at least my emotions are not as fragile as they used to be.
Now, other people cannot disrupt my equilibrium or agitate me unless I intentionally give them that power. Their actions do not take my emotions to a roller coaster ride. Their opinions don't hurt me as badly as before. Well, some make me think for a while (especially if they are from someone in my inner circle). But I don't internalize them. I take them either as feedback for improvement (when they are right) or dismiss them altogether when they are nothing but noise.
I am not totally mature, emotionally. It's still a work in progress, and I intend to keep working on it, gradually.
