EQ, emotional intelligence is the science or skill of knowing yourself and controlling others. It is not the same as IQ, which is about intelligence, you can be highly intelligent and totally emotionless or emotionally ignorant. Empathy is the ability to feel other emotions, it is a part of EQ. Self-awareness and meditation are tools taught by Far eastern cultures and are also a part of EQ. Street smarts is a common name for someone that has a naturally high EQ.
EQ, unlike IQ, can be taught, and can be improved and if you are capable of adjusting your life and adhering to the tenets of EQ, you will find that everything in your life will improve.
The most important tips to remember are these:
- No one is equal
- Everyone was a child once
- Don’t wait to get, go and take
- Widen your social network
- Play to your strengths, use your skills to advance
- Constantly try to improve yourself
- Enjoy trying to manage or control situations
- Know when to stick out and when to be invisible
- Humility is better than pride
- Be proud of what you do but don’t be an ass
- Sympathize and help others
- Always project optimism
- Reduce negative thoughts
- Don’t delay, finish it today
- Being kind is not a weakness
- Asking for forgiveness is a sign of strength
- Balance in everything is best
- Don’t seek justice or revenge unless it serves your goals
- Keep your eye and mind on your goal
- Live your life, not others
Whilst these tips might seem like your one liner quickies from Instagram they actually hold a lot of meaning, here is a breakdown of each one for clarification. - No one is equal, relates to the fact that everyone is different, has different upbringings, different cultures, different environments, different physical attributes and different genetics. All this means is that we are all unique so don’t expect anyone to think like you do or perceive as you do.
- Everyone was a child once, this means that no one is born a leader or a tyrant, a laborer or a businessperson, they grow up in an environment that forges their very being. You also grew up in an environment that made you what you are today. So, knowing this, you can change how you control your life as well as control others, recognizing that everyone went through a childhood to get where they got.
- Don’t wait to get, go and take, if you think that the dice will roll in your favor, or the lottery ticket will win, or that the job you applied for is in the bag, then you are a gambler and as such have no control over your life. If you want to reach your goals leave the gambling to others. Take control of the situation and forge your way ahead.
- Widen your social network, always seek out new friends and acquaintances. Always try to expand your influence, and do so by being active, not just adding a friend and that’s it, Add, insights and articles, post helpful information and be in contact, reply and chat.
- Play to your strengths, use your skills to advance, find out what you are good at, some are good with numbers others with words, some can paint others can sing. Some are master carpenter’s others are military leaders, find out what your strengths are and use them to advance.
- Constantly try to improve yourself, don’t rest on your knowledge or experience, the world is constantly moving forward. Whenever you stand still you are actually going backwards because the world is going forwards and people are constantly learning more. So, seek out ways to improve your knowledge base.
- Enjoy trying to manage or control situations, try out scenarios, (like in the jewelry store example) create situations to put yourself to test. Do it with enjoyment. On the other hand, if you find yourself in a situation, consider all the alternatives and then try to take control of the outcomes.
- Know when to stick out and when to be invisible, sometimes it is not good to always be at the front, sometimes there are others better suited and sometimes it’s too uncertain so don’t take the gamble. Always be in control of the situation, but this can mean you might not lead it. Sometimes the strongest people are the ones you don’t see.
- Humility is better than pride, this relates to success. Even if you win an Olympic race, remember, today you won, tomorrow you might not. There is always someone striving to be better than you as you strive to be better than them.
- Be proud of what you do but don’t be an ass, don’t show off, don’t be a wise-ass, just be thankful, take the praise if it comes, and if it doesn’t don’t seek it and remember you might have to do it all over again.
- Sympathize and help others, always try to help others (unless its detrimental to your promotion or goals – yup, selfishness is also a life skill you have to balance), by helping others you build a network of friends that will come to your help on the day you need it. If they don’t you know who is a real friend and who is an asshole.
- Always project optimism, even in the most dangerous or worst-case scenarios, project optimism. Make those around feel the hope that all will be well. This is a sign of true leadership. Also, on the negative side, nobody likes a whiner! So, go take control, be positive, be active, first do then ask.
- Reduce negative thoughts, stop thinking bad about everyone, and stop thinking everyone has bad intentions, you’re being paranoid unless you’re a prisoner of ISIS then you’re not paranoid.
- Don’t delay, finish it today, remember, the cleaner your desk the more time you have to enjoy life. Unless you like to work all the time. Also, the quicker you finish your tasks the more time you will have to make more income or advance.
- Being kind is not a weakness, in a competitive situation helping others in despair is not a sign of weakness, it is a sign of strength. It shows you are confident enough to win even when you help others. Just don’t overdo it!
- Asking for forgiveness is a sign of strength, always claim responsibility for your actions. Don’t pass the buck and the quicker you stand up the quicker it’s over and you gain more respect. Unless you killed someone…then you’re just a psychopath.
- Balance in everything is best, as in everything, cooking for instance, the balance of ingredients and the process you use either make a great dish or a mess. Life is the same, it’s all about balance.
- Don’t seek revenge unless it serves your goals, revenge takes your focus off YOU and onto THEM. Once you concentrate on them you forget you and you don’t go forward.
- Keep your eye and mind on your goal, remember, this is about you, your desires, your emotions and how you manage them and others to reach your goals in life. Everything you do should be about you and how you influence others, but in a meaningful and good way.
- Live your life, not others, don’t listen to nay Sayers, don’t pay attention to cruel words and definitely don’t listen to jibes and jabs. All those people are basically idiots. They live a lonely life in a mire of stupidity, ttring to make you as miserable as they are. Rise above them, live your life how you want it. Do what you want to do, and enjoy your life. You only live once…you can’t do much after your dead!