It was long time ago around 6 years. As an Erasmus Student I went to the Poland. It was really big things for me to break my nut. After around 2 months, I met with a polish girl. She was my first love ( at present my last love and will be only one for me). Since leaving her I didn't realise that I love her that much. I understood my love at my last day too much. After going back to Turkey, I knew that she would come to Turkey for travel. And I decided to write her for meeting. We met in a small city. And it was really unforgettable for me. We had really good night together. After a week she went back to Poland. We were chatting every day. I was willing to have a life with her. But because of some issues that I can't tell now we broke up again. During this splitting, everyday and every night I was thinking and dreaming about her, my heart was always beating for her. After around 6 monthes, I couldn't hold myself and wrote her to do sth for us to be united forever. For going near her, I collected some money by working the worst jobs I can never prefer to work. Whatever, after that I applied for visa. I prepared everything for receiving visa. Everything was legal and perfect. I was thinking that it is guarantee to receive it. But after application when it is time to have result and planning to meet with my love. But result was a fail. According to consular, my aim to travel Poland ( I applied for tourist visa) was not realistic and they rejected my application and I couldn't receive visa. Normally it should be enough to try and after a time I could apply again. But I couldn't resist. My emotions were so high. The possibility to be without her was terrible for me. I wanted her to be my wife, mom of my kids etc. I decided to escape to Poland illegally. I had contacts to receive green passport with illegalist people. But they wanted too much money and I couldn't afford for it. Later I made a plan that going to Ukraine and escaping from there to Poland. I bought flight ticket to lviv. I knew that from Ukraine to Poland there are escapors which bring alcohol and cigarettes. I had contacts with them via a friend who I met in Ukraine. But escapors told me that it is so dangerous and they didn't help me I affered even money but they told 'no'. They said me to go to Belarus because it is so easy to pass border from there. Before trying to escape. While I was looking for ways to escape I read that Chechen people who were escaping from Russian violence were easily passing border. So I went to Belarus. I went to the Brest where second World war' s finest crashes happened. I was looking ways to escape . I traveled the city . There was noone to contact because nobody speaks English. I was so close to freak my mind out. I decided to go back and I said my self that if I am here, let myself travel city more. While I was traveling museum of Second World War. Suddenly I realised that here is the border of Poland-Belarus. And saw someone is passing border at riverside. My escaping ids boosted. I went back to hotel got my things and fly to the borderside. After passing border 5 steps, a border police officer appeared in front of me. And I arrested. They got my everything ( phone, money etc.) After 15 days I deported to Turkey. And I wrote to my love and told everything. She was terrified because she didn't have any info from me. Whatever we got contact around 1 year and half. She gave promises to me for coming near me and be family but she didn't come. I learned that she was dating with boys while I was dreaming about us.
I am so stupid I know unfortunately