Not easy to decide to get married. Do not believe?
Just try ... ... !! I have felt it 23 years ago. Having someone we love and loving us does not guarantee that we will easily nod our heads for a marriage. Even though someone we love can't wait at the other end ... doubt will always come. The question is ... Is he really a mate that God provides for us? It's not easy, it turns out, it brings together two different individuals. Do not believe? Just try it ... !! Although happy because he finally became ours, it turns out that the early days of marriage were not as sweet as imagined. Opinion is often the case often happens in these times, why? because at that time we just like to really know our partner. So many differences are revealed. Love alone turns out to be insufficient to overcome that difference, it takes more than just love to surpass it ... In the early days of marriage people will usually be awakened, that what was felt at the introductory period was a sacrifice, so as if what We are willing to do it, including 'I am you' or 'I will understand you', not as beautiful as before. Interestingly, at that time people just realized that to change 'I' to 'us' is not as easy as understanding its use in Indonesian. Difficult? Afraid? There is nothing to fear because even though it is difficult, everything is not as beautiful as imagined. Nature turned out to have provided a perfect example ... Water, which soothes, purifies, and benefits the lives of mankind actually comes from Oxygen and Hydrogen atoms which used to be very flammable and gaseous. After forming a compound, water has completely different properties from its original nature. This is where the essence of change from me becomes 'us'. In 'we' can no longer be distinguished which 'I' and 'you'.
Like the nature of water, there are no more Oxygen or Hydrogen properties that appear there, all melting into new properties, 'AIR'. Great ... So the essence is marriage should form each pair into a new personality that is solid, resilient, and a mercy for those around him, not the other way around. Many people, especially men, are afraid of facing marriage because marriage means blocking freedom. Actually marriage actually makes us learn to respect freedom, learn to respect one's own, learn sincerely and be honest with yourself, Marriage makes us learn to respect freedom ?? How come? of course it can be because only humans are able to feel the meaning of love and happiness. When we handcuff our partners in prison in the name of 'love' at that time he has become a human without a heart What kind of happiness can we get from a partner who only gives the body but not his heart?
Your partner is like clothes for you, so Allah SWT says,
Who wants to wear dirty clothes? that is why we must take care of our clothes so that they are not tarnished, keep them neat and fragrant so that when used is pleasing to the heart and makes us look beautiful and attractive. Therefore marriage teaches us how to respect our own property.
Marriage teaches us to be sincere.
A friend says, a sincere heart with zero entropy (entropy according to physics is the degree of system irregularity, the greater the irregular entropy of a system).
According to the Law of Thermodynamics II, everything in nature moves towards chaos, meaning that entropy will tend to move bigger. Once the entropy will be maximal, then the whole world will be destroyed, so extreme.
Only low temperatures and reaction reversibility can regulate so that entropy is minimal.
That means a sincere heart can only be achieved by lowering the temperature of emotions, the temperature of lust, the temperature of the ego, and the temperature of the desire to master something.
A sincere heart can also be achieved by arranging a balance between worldly, spiritual, spiritual, Hablumminallah-Hablumminannash, obligations.
How? look at our partner and look at ourselves, we are not perfect enough for each other.
Then how to complete our perfection? Learning to accept all the shortcomings as he also accepts us as we are. Cover the shortcomings with our strengths just as he does the same for us.
Hold hands to adjust balance.
If natural law teaches this, why do we humans who are part of nature do not try to follow it together as water flows?
Last but not least, marriage teaches us to be honest with ourselves ...
As atoms when they want to bind to each other honestly tell each other's shortcomings. Combustible oxygen as well as highly reactive Hydrogen never hide their shortcomings and advantages. In the end they compound to produce something more dasyhat of their original nature.
Isn't this beautiful relationship? If from the beginning we instill a commitment that this is me with all my shortcomings and strengths, then both together find a formula to make all the shortcomings of both become joint fame?
It turns out that marriage is bad, but it's really good ... can't believe it? Just try it ... !!
Written by: Mrs. Atiek Winarti