Thanks Libertycrypto27. All of the wonderful messages has given me some comfort. I know it will take time but I don't want this experience be what defines my son and I. Clodagh wanted us to find happiness again and that is exactly what I will strive to do. Luckily, as father and son, we are very open about our feelings. ( I can thank Clodagh for that also). We are doing Ok one day at a time. Thanks again.