Fair Winds and Following Seas, Cousin

This shot above is from my wedding almost three decades ago. Christa, left and her sister, Kim, right. She was so young, and full of life then.

A decade later, and she was on her honeymoon, herself. We all got a call, something was wrong. While in the Caribbean, something attacked her nervous system. She spent a decade, learning to walk again, and learning to control her muscles. Her vision slowly returned, and even some of her hearing. She could feed herself, and walk somewhat...But never smiling like this...

A second decade later and she had fought as much as she could, but she was in a wheel chair, no matter how much medicine and physical therapy she had. We began to accept that, she may never be fully mobile, fully independent ever again. At this point, more of her life was spent with this syndrome than without.

Fast forward now and she's been living in a group home for people with traumatic brain injuries, since essentially, her entire nervous system and brain were unable to function correctly. It was a struggle, just to get her aid, and skilled nursing care. But, the family prevailed! We accepted that, she was wheel chair bound. Always needing skilled nursing care... but she still could communicate... until...

This past 6 months or so, she lost even that ability. Words didn't come any longer. Nor did her smiles. Of course, we all faked it, smiling... around her... but inside, something wasn't right.


Two weeks ago, word came that hit even harder... Cancer. At first it was a lump in her breast. By the next day, when imaging was in, the cancer was everywhere. Her spine, her throat, her chest and lungs. Earlier this week, her parents said good bye. Her sister Kim sat bedside and read her favorite book, Watership Down My wife joined her for a couple days. Sitting. Yesterday, I saw her, in her bed... morphine and methodone, to kill any pain and sensation. She never woke the entire time I spent with her. My wife and cousin were going to spend the night, but came home. For some much needed rest. Earlier today, Christa's feet were like ice. Her hands, too. I left, to drive home. My wife called to tell me her face was bruised, and her hands were like ice. Aware, or not, she she was shutting down.


I was online when the next call from my wife came in...

My family spent our time growing up next to the ocean, on Cape Cod.As far back as I remember we had boats. Most every one I knew here did too. The locals, not the rich out of towners, and tourists, but the locals, were part of the fishing industry. Or boating. So, we learned many nautical phrases...
One we always said, when someone passed, was Fair Winds, and Following Seas! It meant, safe journey.

And so, Christa, so full of life, and so beautiful, I say, Fair Winds And Following Seas, on this, your next journey, with no pain, and with smiles and walking along the shores of Truro, again!