Hey Regina, how did you handle CPS?
This is a question I guess most times from parents and no matter the reply I give, I believe I will still meet another person who would ask me the same question tomorrow. The absolute truth is that I was a complete novice, and I was very naive and trusting when I was dealing with CPS. Although, this changed immediately I saw the big picture, but many harm had already occurred and there was no way of undoing this damages.
If I could go back in time and undo a specific invent, I won't travel back in time too far, I would go back to the day CPS gave a filthy knock at my door. It is very painful that as a loving parent, you had to deal with CPS and lose temporarily at a point, it is painful that I couldn't protect my family when they needed me most. Though all the things that happened has opened I and my husband up to a different view of the system, but it was an incidence I never wanted to pass through ever again.
More painful is that I betrayed the trust of my children when they needed me most!. My husband and I have gotten so many visits from CPS since one was attached to us!. As a mother and a as a child at one time, I understand how children can so much trust their parents because they believe that Parents are their Protectors. Even at this moment, I can't seem to forgive myself for allowing those things happen back then due to my ignorance. I had to pass through a lot of stress after giving birth to my last daughter May 2017, to be held in the hospital like a prisoner on the command of CPS was one of the cruelest thing a mother can experience after labor.
Although, my husband understood some of his rights which he exercised during the time they came visiting, but it was too late because we were too permissive and passive. Naturally, I always believed that there was a lot I regretted doing as a mother or as an adult, but never did I ever think that CPS would be one of them, in fact they sit on my number one list.
So, when someone asks me how I got away from the grips of CPS, I simply reply;
"I don't think I did, even if I did, the scar they left is too much to bear and my older kids still have a form minute trust issues after their home was invaded by CPS".
I didn't handle CPS well, and the point I and my husband stopped being compliant with them, that was the time our walls of safety gradually began to return, too late but never too late. I have had a lot of regrets and if I would start writing on them, I bet this post will go on forever and my emotional grip would be all loosed. I remember when my Naive self would disagree with my husband about the CPS, and tell him to let them do their job and leave us alone.
Hello Philip, I know you would be reading this post and I though I have told you a number of time, I shouldn't have been so compliant with them and I am sorry for those disagreement about that Worker and CPS, I am glad our kids are safe because we got to agree and fight them like our lives depended on it, our life did depend on it.
Caseworkers are ready to use your emotions against you, if they can, they are ready to break your home into pieces with whatever tactics they could think of. This post is not to lament on what my family passed through, thank God we made it out, but the post is to tell you not to do things you would regret as a mother. You don't ever want to get to the stage I got to before being Knowledgeable about CPS. I repeat, you do not want to regret the things that I do regret nor get to the stage I got to at a point in my life!. Fortunately, you don't have to regret if only you discern for yourself and make decision with an informed mind when caseworkers come knocking.
If you ever have a regret so dense, be rest assured that your children are feeling or will feel more emotional trauma and unhappiness. Parents are their Towers of protection, when we make bad or uninformed decisions, children have their many shares of hurts. Take this as a FACT from a mother who had being through hell and back.
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