This is a reader insert about Blaine from Hot Tub Time Machine
Words: 2121
Warnings: Alcohol, implied smut, a dude getting his ass kicked a few times, shitty writing
AN: I hope this is any good. It’s really weird. I found it very hard to write this but I’m pretty okay with how it turned out. I just hope you like it too.
“I just really don’t get it!” Lou exclaimed, walking next to you. You didn’t even know what he was talking about. “I can’t believe you haven’t invented fucking google yet, with your awesome coding programming skills,” he said, making weird typing gestures with his hands. Yup, he was wasted.
You came on this trip with him and his friends because he was your roommate and you were the only one who could totally stand him. Not even his life long friends could. Of course you were a hella lot younger than he was, but the rent was pretty cheap so you put up with him. That was of course until you found him passed out in his car with some vague eighties music blasting.
“Well that is because I can’t, you fucking idiot,” you chuckled. “Because of the butterflies, remember? By the way we’re looking for some guy to punch you in the face now, so get on with it. Where is he?” you asked him.
“Well Y/N, if I actually remembered how he looked it would be a lot easi… umph” Suddenly a guy bumped into your roommate and they both turned around. In front of the two of you now stood a slightly taller, handsome guy with chestnut brown hair, great cheekbones, a turtleneck, and a jacket with a weird pattern. With him was a guy in a polo who looked more reserved.
Lou looked at the guy weirdly and you realised this was probably Blaine, the guy you were looking for.
“You wanna go for it?” Blaine said, doing weird karate like movements. It looked kind of cute if you were honest. “Come on, take a shot pussy. Wanna party? Wanna be a hero?” He teased, raising his fist up.
“And… here it comes…” Lou muttered as Blaine’s fist came closer to his face. It hit him so hard he fell to the ground. You let out a small chuckle, because the whole thing had been kind of comical.
“Oh, yeah. You gonna cry?” Blaine mocked Lou, looking down at him. “You gonna cry, titty baby…” he continued but his voice faltered as he saw you. You looked back at him with a raised eyebrow and he backed off, but not before taking Lou’s backpack from the ground. “This fucking bag is mine now.” He said, then he turned to you. “You can do much better than him…” he told you before walking off.
“Is that all?” you asked Lou, helping him off the ground. But he shook your hands off as soon as he was standing.
“No!” he exclaimed and started his rant : “I yell back at him and I challenge him to a rematch at midnight saying ‘you bring your friends and I’ll bring mine’ and my friends don’t fucking show up. So I get pummeled by six guys instead of one.”
“I’m sorry, but you’ll have to do that again, old man.” you tell him, pointing at Blaine who is still walking away from you guys. “Do it for the butterflies, and also kind of for me because I might wanna take him out for a drink.”
Lou looked at you with a shocked look. “What?!? That didn’t happen in the past, and it sure as hell shouldn’t happen now. What if you end up not getting born? Who’s gonna pay half of the rent then? Who’s gonna bake the most awesome cake in the world?” He whisper-yelled at you.
“I don’t care Lou, just do it!” You snapped back at him and he sighed. “We need that bag back, it has my weed!”
Lou looked at you, kind of disappointed and then turned to the person who had just kicked his ass. “Hey Blaine!” He yelled but his voice sounded scared, “Is that all you got, pussy?”
After getting pummeled by Blaine again, Lou had picked up some girl and went to her room with her. You were on your way back to your room when Blaine’s friend stopped you.
“Hey, you’re the girl who was with that idiot earlier, right?” he asked, holding your arm. “There’s a party down at the Ski Patrol shack, wanna come?” You thought for a bit, thinking if this could change the future.
Why would it? It was just a party, right? “Sure, lead the way.” You smiled at the guy. “Also, can you ask Blaine to give me Lou’s backpack? It had my weed in it.” you explained as ‘polo’ took your arm and lead you to the cottage.
“Maybe you should ask him yourself. He doesn’t really listen to me…” he chuckled and you walked on.
On the way to the house you learned ‘polo’ was actually called Chaz and that he had been Blaine’s best friend for years. When you arrived you found that the party was already pretty ‘rad’, as Chaz stated. The music could be heard from afar, and people were even dancing outside.
Blaine met you and Chaz at the top of the stairs. “Chaz, where’ve you been? They’re Ruskies. I found some weird Commie shit in their bag,” he told his friend, not noticing you for a bit. But then he did and his face went to an expression of pure terror. “You brought one of them in here? Chaz what were you thinking?”
You looked at him with an amused smile on your face. “Well sweetheart, you don’t have to be scared of me,” you said, your voice coming out a bit more sultry than you wanted to. You played with your hair and looked at him.
Blaine looked between you and Chaz with a confused look. “Aren’t you with them?” he asked, a frown on his face. “Did they kidnap you?”
You chuckled and put your hand on his chest. “No, they didn’t kidnap me. But Lou carried my phone in his bag, and I’d like it back,” you explained. “Also, now that I see you, I’d like you to apologise for punching my roommate in the nose.”
His bright blue eyes looked into yours and he sighed. “I’m sorry. I didn’t want it to affect you. I still hate that son of a bitch though.”
You tapped his cheek and smiled. “That’s good enough for me. Now, our bag.” Then you suddenly got an idea, just to mess with him. “If you’re nice I might tell you what those things are for.”
A smirk was grazing your face, making Blaine thing something else than what you had in mind. He took your hand and led you to his room. The place was covered in Red Dawn and Rocky posters and all of that other old stuff. Your stuff was laid out on his bed, along with your phone. With a grin you took it and turned it on. “Thanks. Now I can play Angry Birds again,” you cheered.
That wiped that smirk straight off his face. “You ARE one of them. You lied to me!” Blaine shouted. “I can’t believe I thought you were gonna suck me off,” he said, pacing around his room while you made yourself comfortable on his bed.
You smirked, wanting to have some fun. “For the right price I’m willing to change sides,” you chuckled, winking at him. You saw the bulge in his tight pants growing. You stood up and walked over to him, looking up into his eyes. “Get me a drink and we can talk…” you said in a low voice.
Blaine bit his lip before nodding and walking to the door. Not even two minutes later he came back. Once again you were sitting against his headboard, playing Angry Birds now. When he came in you smiled at him and reached your hand out to grab the cup of beer. “Thanks cutie…” you smirked, sipping from it.
He joined you in the bed, sitting next to you. “So, what is this. Are you Russian?” he asked, his voice serious.
You chuckled and shook your head. “I’m a Time Lord,” you lied, but not completely. “And I came from the future…” You held up your phone and laughed. “This is like my sonic screwdriver, but only cooler.”
Blaine looked at you as if you were an alien (because he believed you were), but in the good way. His inner nerd was coming out. “Is your name the Doctor? Did you regenerate as a woman?”
You found this very cute and smiled. “No, my name is Y/N and this is my first regeneration. I just survived in it for a very long time,” you said, winking at him. You took another sip of your beer and Blaine did the same.
“So what does your Sonic thingy do?” he asked with a smile, pointing at your phone.
“It does everything. It plays music, you can play games, you can call people and stuff like that…” you explained. “Here I’ll teach you,” you offered, giving him your phone.
You taught him how to play Angry Birds, and he was hooked from the first second. You found yourself looking at him, getting interested in him.
He played for hours until your phone died. “What?!?” he exclaimed, throwing the phone on the bed. “I was on a roll!”
You chuckled and put the phone on his nightstand before turning back to him. “It needs to charge. But I can’t here. I have to go to the future for that. And I like it here too much…” you whispered.
Blaine looked at you and before he could say something you had pressed your lips against his in a passionate kiss. He cupped your cheek and responded to the kiss by moaning into it. It was the hottest sound you had ever heard.
By twelve he and you were a sweaty, panting mess. “Fuck! You have that fight with Lou!” you suddenly exclaimed. Not that you wanted your friend to get his ass kicked, but you promised you’d be there for him.
Blaine shot up too, grabbing his clothes and putting them on in a rush and watched you do the same. When you had put on your bra you realised that Blaine had ripped your shirt. You looked at him with a smile and showed him the torn piece of fabric. “Mind giving me a shirt?”
With a smirk he reached into his closet and threw a sweatshirt at you. “There you go, cutie,” he winked before opening the door to yell at his friends to get ready.
You put it on and saw Blaine was waiting for you. As soon as you were ready he grabbed your hand and pulled you with him to the place you first met. It was also the place Lou and Blaine had arranged to have their rematch.
When Lou saw you coming he was confused. First of all because the rest of his friends didn’t show up, and his other friend was holding his opponent’s hand. “Y/N? Seriously?” he asked you with a raised eyebrow.
“Hey!” you exclaimed, a bit offended. “At least I’m here, right?”
You begged Blaine to wait for a few more minutes, to see if the rest was still going to come. But after a few minutes you gave up, deciding to fight anyways.
It was nasty. Blaine, Chaz and three other guys took on Lou, while you had managed to get one of their guys on their knees. You were punching him in the face when you heard Blaine call your name.
“Hey, Y/N!” he said, while kicking Lou in the nuts. “Wanna go get dinner on Monday? It’s my day off.”
“Sure. Casual or fancy?” you asked, kneeing the guy you were handling softly.
“What the fuck! Y/N!” Lou yelled, before he got punched by Chaz again.
“Hey Blaine!” you said, “Maybe you should let him go. The poor guy’s been fucked over enough.”
“Alright…” he muttered, “Guys! Fall back!” And just like the fight died down.
You let the boy go, and patted his shoulder. “I’m sorry, buddy,” you said, your voice sincere.
He backed away from you and muttered something like “Hell that girl can fight…” The look on his face was priceless.
Blaine looked at you, his eyes asking you to join him again. You looked at Lou, as if to ask him for permission.
“Alright…” he huffed after a while, “But be safe! Wear a condom! The butterflies are watching!” You smiled at your friend and took Blaine’s hand.
As you were walking Blaine smiled down at you. “So, shouldn’t you be heading back to the future?” You chuckled and shook your head.
“I can’t. My spaceship is broken. So I think I’ll have to stay here for a while.”