The fact remains, that feminism will keep deluding most Nigerians, as they keep struggling with misconceptions about it.
How we keep mixing other people's idiosyncrasies and sentiments to come up with an adulterated version is not what surprise me, but how we make it look as if feminism is a war between the sexes, is what bemuse my mortal existence.
The fact that you see someone as your demigod or perfect role model, doesn't mean you should always follow their thought process, hook line and sinker. You're created with a brain, think for yourself too. Stop following blindly. This is the very issue I have with over zealous folks who are glued to their religious leaders, that they can no longer think for themselves.
We should be able to understand when people share their personal opinions, sentiments and idiosyncrasies on a subject matter, and distinguish same from the true tenets of what that concept entails. This is what makes a rationale human, as distinct from a zombie.
Let me say this again, Chimamanda Adiche wasn't setting a new standard for feminism when she asked Hillary that question about her bio, but was only expressing her sentiments concerning Hillary's bio vis-a-vis her relationship with her husband. How we ascribed the whole issue to feminism only expose our ignorance of what feminism is, and the dark way we have understand same to be.
Feminism is one concept I respect so much, and Hillary Clinton is one woman I love so much. Hilary and Chimamanda are the very kind of women I would refer to as true feminists. They are both doing well in their field of endeavors, and not even the fact that they are married hinders them from aspiring to greater heights. That's the lessons that should picked from their interaction with each other. Though Chi's question suggest the kind of toxic feminism we keep battling with in this part of the world, especially in this streets of ZuckerVille we find ourselves, it's still not a standard for the true concept of feminism but a deviation from the true purpose. Such deviation is toxic and calls for war than true advocacy.
Feminism is not a competition or a war between the two sexes. It's a genuine call higher than such trivialities.
When you insist you aren't gonna do a thing except your partner does same, it washes away the sanctity of love in a relationship and introduce toxic coexistence sparked up by unhealthy competition.
The healthy guide should be doing things because you want to do them or because you are so comfortable doing them, and not necessarily because the other party is doing same or not. So long as you were not coerced to do same, it's healthy and sane. It defeats the essence of genuine intention and love when you do or refuse to do a thing just because your partner isn't doing same, that's outside the tenets of feminism, especially if the partner's refusal is not deeply rooted in some toxic patriarchy norms.
Feminism is not what destroy homes, but the battle of sexes is what does, it is a very toxic misconception of feminism that should be avoided. The battle for sexes is an offshoot of feminism, women who subscribes to it are those battling with inferiority complex as regards their sex.
I would like to see it as a radical approach introduced by ancient feminists due to the frustration of absolute marginalization of the rights of women. Times where women were not even allowed to vote let alone being voted for. I like to think, it was the psychological consequences of these marginalization that brought about this offshoot of feminism. Have also seen women who get married to terrible men holding on to the abandoned wings of this offshoot of feminism. It's far from being a sane practice, and to a large extent doesn't speak well to the sanity of the true concept of feminism. Feminism is far from being the battle of sexes, but the battle for the benefits of what both sexes stands to derive, anything that deals with the war between the sexes, is not feminism, it is misandrism and misogynism, respectively.
Don't always conflict misandrism to be feminism, these are two separate concepts. Misandrism is an offshoot of feminism. This is where we have been getting it all wrong.
We should be able to know when someone is a misandrist as distinct from when someone is a feminist. These are two different persons, while one is sane, the other is a psychological disorder.
