If you're new to my Universe, please read the Introduction and Prelude. Then feel free to pick whatever story you like the most from this list.
Compositions
| Wright's Story | Stella's Story | Parzifal's Story |
|---|---|---|
| Overture – The Sponge | Bagatelle – In the Forests of the Night | Ballad – Body & Mind |
| Fugue – Abducted | Fantasia – Mystery Garden | Sonata - Anyman |
| Lullaby – Stranger Than Dreams | Capriccio – Playing with Portals | Dirge – What a Wonderful Shitpile |
| Nocturne – A World Asleep | Rhapsody – Intersection of the Multiverse | Requiem – Violent Redemption |
| Abby's Story | Arol's Story | John Doe's Story |
| Motet – School of Wills | Elegy – Of Life & Purpose | Oratorio – Rebirth at a Funeral |
| Serenade – Classes and Classes | Suite – Beautiful Minds | Aria – The Life and Lies of a Nobody |
| Aubade – The Attraction Point | Finale – Messiah for a Day | Concerto – I Am Become Life |
| Antiphon – Army of Puppets |
As long as you start from the beginning of a particular character's story, everything should make perfect sense (well at much sense as starting with any other story). I'll try to fill this table in with links as much as possible in future posts, but since steemit doesn't let you edit after a certain amount of time, older posts won't have too many links. In any case, you can use this table as a reference, and then find the next piece of the story on my profile (or just click on my latest upload to see which ones have been written and choose from there). 😊 Enjoy!
One additional note before you dive into this particular chapter... It's a very depressing origin story. So, be prepared to read some fucked-up shit. I promise the payoff will be worth it though.
All around me the air breathes
And in the darkness, something seethes
But no heart around me skips a beat
For they're told each day that life's a treat
So, when I suggest that our routine is a bit funny
Not so sunny
They turn and I get left in the darkOnce a day around this time
I listen close and hear a chime
The sound signals all are in great peril
Not to open a wine barrel
How tiresome it is for them to heed that warning
Lies start forming
And the people choose to be left in the darkI tread down these strange school halls
And in a second, silence falls
My limbs then move against my will
All in this moment are silent still
When my arm is made to grab the throat of someone new
And then a few
Soon I'm all that's left in the darkA puppet's dance is my life now
I'm walked along and forced to bow
And all around me happy peoples
Return to worship under steeples
I can't even attempt to pretend that I'm that blind
And so, I find
I start to wish I was left in the dark"
– Tywin & Gertrude, Left in Darkness EP
For the third time in a week, Abigail had done something so bizarrely out of character that she decided it was time to go see a doctor. The first time had been relatively innocuous. The jubilant feeling from her team, the underdogs, winning combined with a bit of alcohol and some hormones might make many people kiss everyone they see in a bar. Right? That’s what she had told herself at least. Even after she went off on a couple of strangers in a grocery store after a slightly stressful day, she just made excuses for her behavior.
The third time was different though. She had actually punched a lady in the face for no reason. She didn’t even know her. She was lucky the lady just called her a crazy bitch. In that moment, Abby stopped making excuses for her behavior. Something had to be medically wrong with her. With that thought in mind, Abby found herself sitting in a rather cramped lobby waiting to talk to a psychiatrist.
A week later she was on bipolar medication that didn’t seem to be helping. One minute she’d be just fine, and the next she’d have to lie about how she had forgotten to take her meds. Several trips to the doctor, and many medication cocktails later, and she was still no closer to solving her bizarre, out-of-character episodes.
About four months later on a Friday night the first horrible clue to this twisted mystery revealed itself to Abby. She had been walking home from a nearby bar slightly more drunk than normal but not so far gone that she couldn’t stumble her way back home. At least, that’s what she had thought. The next thing she remembered was being pressed facedown into a soft and unfamiliar bed, unable to move a single muscle.
Male voices said things around her, but her brain wasn’t processing anything beyond that. She couldn’t move. She was being violated. These were the only thoughts she was registering. Then suddenly she flipped onto her back, but it wasn’t her who made that decision. She had just done it, and now she couldn’t move again. Her eyes remained squeezed shut throughout, and no amount of effort on her part could change that.
This horrible nightmare continued for hours, until suddenly, it was over. Abby opened her eyes to her bedroom. She wanted to believe it had been a nightmare, and all the evidence seemed to point to that conclusion, but what had happened felt way too real to be dismissed as a night terror.
Abby called in sick the next week. Only when she started to make sense of what happened did the depression she was feeling turned into hatred which motivated her to return to work. The following Saturday, she ventured out of her house to get some groceries, and everything began to click. While picking through a basket of avocados, she felt a sudden urge to chuck one at a nearby child. Except, for the first time in months, she didn’t do the crazy thing she wanted to do. At least, not at first. The urge grew stronger until it became an almost audible chant in her head. Eventually she succumbed to it and spent the following half hour apologizing to the child’s mother and lying about her medical condition.
But she knew now that her behavior had nothing to do with her at all. It was something else. Something was making her do things she didn’t want to do, and for whatever reason, she could finally sense what it wanted from her before she was forced to obey.
The next week she went back to work at the department store like normal, and only then did she realize how often she had been fucked with. The urge to do things quickly turned into a commanding voice that was with her most of the day. It told her to do ordinary things most of the time, but now that Abby could hear it, she couldn’t help but think what she was being made to do was somehow sinister. And so, every time the urge came, she ignored it for as long as possible, until eventually it forced her to do it’s bidding.
Weeks went by, but Abby’s resolve continued to strengthen. One day she noticed that she had been resisting the urge to follow the commanding voice a bit longer than normal. Occasionally, she completely ignored some of the more trivial commands it had given. It was these glimmers of hope that kept her going.
After several more weeks of resisting the voice’s influence, Abby became convinced it was a person doing this to her. Some of the things she was ordered to do screamed of carnal desire that she couldn’t logically attribute to anything else. Abby grew increasingly paranoid of the people around her, and took note of their faces.
One night, a particularly strong urge directed her back to The Roost, the same bar she had been at the night she had been raped. She could feel the voice’s desire in every command it gave that evening, until finally, it had her walking home alone again. This time, she was considerably less drunk. Over the course of the night, every time the voice ordered to drink, she acted more drunk than she was, hoping the voice wouldn’t be able to tell the difference. Her plan had succeeded, as she was still fairly sober, but Abby couldn’t help but wonder if she would find herself wishing she was farther gone by the end of the night.
About halfway home, the voice had her change course. She followed it for miles until she arrived at a dirt road. As she headed down the road, her sense of dread grew proportionally with the overgrowth. Eventually the road became a hiking trail, and after a certain point, she couldn’t tell if she was following a path at all. Abby was thoroughly exhausted, but her legs hadn’t gotten the memo and kept moving without missing a beat.
And then, through the dark, an enormous looming structure cast a shadow over what was left of the path. She squinted through the darkness at perhaps the most unexpected end to her journey that she could’ve imagined – the ruins of an old castle. Before the shock of where she was being taken to sunk in, the scene changed. In the place of the ruins, stood a magnificent, fully-restored castle.
The hiking trail ended abruptly at the edge of a moat. Abby stood there, legs about to collapse, in the freezing cold for a few minutes gazing into the darkness before anything happened. A loud crack lit the air, and a drawbridge began to lower.
Once the bridge had fully lowered, Abby entered the castle. She found herself in a wonderfully grand entrance hall decorated with red and black banners. A magnificent chandelier hung from the ceiling and candles adorned the walls. Though a sense of dread had filled her throughout her journey, she now felt nothing of the sort. It was impossible not to be impressed with this place.
Abby started walking off to the side of the entrance hall at an increased pace. The voice seemed to have a renewed power in this place, and Abby was unable to resist it for even a second. She twisted and turned through darkly lit corridors, and her sense of dread returned in full force.
Dread turned to panic when she rounded a corner and immediately shut her eyes. She continued walking at the same fast pace, unable to see before coming to an abrupt stop. She reached out her hand, and opened a door.
“There she is!” an unfamiliar voice called out to her left.
“Mark never disappoints,” another said.
“Give Mark my sincerest thanks,” the first one added.
“He doesn’t need your thanks,” someone new replied as Abby was forced to lay face down on a bed. “Just your money.”
“Transferring now. Give him my thanks anyway. This one is really good-looking.”
“How does he get them to be so obedient?”
“Need to know only,” Mark’s mouthpiece said.
“Whatever.”
“And we can do whatever we want, right?”
“Yes, anything except seriously injure her. I’ll be just outside if you need something.”
Abby heard the door close. Seconds later she was being handled by at least two people. One began tearing her clothes off while the other roughly grabbed her face.
“Should we blindfold her?”
“Naw, Mark said she’d keep her eyes shut.”
“You really believe she’ll do that? Isn’t that kind of stupid?”
“Well everything else he said was true, but fuck it, blindfold her if you’re into that.”
A few seconds later, someone was tying a blindfold roughly over her eyes. Another man began roughly using her legs to get themselves off.
Abby’s brain shut down as hours seemed to pass without much more being uttered than the occasional, “My turn.” One by one the men left until Abby was alone. Someone else entered the room. They seemed to be cleaning up the mess the animals had left. Abby began putting on unfamiliar clothes and fixing her hair, all while her eyes remained shut.
She left the room, nearly running through the castle. She shoved a door open and cold air hit her face. Abby crossed the drawbridge once it had fully lowered, and only then did she finally open her eyes.
Her pace increased to a full sprint even though she felt she shouldn’t be able to stand. She raced through the overgrowth to the dirt road, and eventually back to town. But Abby wasn’t directed to return home yet.
She approached a 24-hour drug store and went to purchase an emergency contraceptive pill.
The clerk, an older gentleman, gave her a funny look, “Where’s the fella? Are you okay, Miss?”
“I’m fine,” Abby’s lips said as she paid.
The clerk glanced at some hand-shaped bruises on her arm as he handed her the small box.
“Miss, do you want me to call the police? Just nod if you need help.”
“Call the police?” Abby’s lips said in exasperation, “I don’t know what you think happened, sir, but you’ve made some bad assumptions. My boyfriend’s just tired, and this bruise is from horseback riding.”
“Sorry Miss, didn’t mean to offend,” the clerk said apologetically. “Just needed to make sure you were alright.”
“Thanks, but I’m fine. Do you have some water?”
“I do, one sec.”
The clerk returned from the back room with a bottle of water and handed it to Abby who had already ripped open the box.
“Thank you,” Abby said curtly as she grabbed the water. She took a large gulp before downing the pill.
“You look exhausted,” the clerk said, still clearly concerned, “Make sure you get some sleep, okay?”
“Yeah,” Abby replied dismissively as she left the drug store.
She walked a few more blocks to her flat and dug into her pocket for her keys only to realize she didn’t have them. Maybe they were still at the castle, but the bar could have them too. Abby pulled out her phone and called maintenance. Twenty minutes later, a man showed up to let her in.
“Rough night?” the man said.
“Had a little too much to drink,” Abby replied.
“I hear ya. Well, have a good night,” he answered without much fanfare.
“Thanks, you too.”
Abby stumbled into her flat, apparently trying to give the impression that she was drunk. She closed the door and made her way to the bed. As much as she wanted to collapse, she apparently still had more to do. She removed the clothes she was wearing, tied them up in a plastic bag, and dropped them out her window. She then meticulously cleaned herself up. By this time, the sun was already rising.
Abby finally was made to lay down on her bed, thoroughly exhausted. Seconds later, she was out.
Abby woke late the next day and didn’t leave her bed until the day after. The voice wasn’t with her. No doubt it was enjoying all the money it had made. When Abby managed to get up, she went straight to her computer and searched for ways to painlessly kill herself.
She found several helpful sites that described exactly the best way to do it. Each one had a well-written section that tried to talk her out of it. None of them were convincing to her though. Her situation was actually unique despite all the claims that she wasn’t alone.
Clicking past another suicide prevention number, Abby soon discovered that most of the drugs commonly used in the past were now too hard to get. She briefly considered illegally ordering a euthanasia drug, but wasn’t sure how long she’d have her freedom. She finally settled on whatever Acetaminophen she could buy at a nearby drugstore combined with a plastic bag.
It wasn’t going to be as painless as she originally hoped for, but Abby didn’t think she’d be able to shoot or hang herself. With a half-formed plan in mind, Abby set out for the nearest drug store determined to end things before it became impossible.
She immediately found the section with various medications and grabbed a large package of paracetamol. When she went to the counter to purchase it, to her annoyance, the same clerk she ran into a couple nights ago, greeted her. She placed the large package of paracetamol tablets on the counter and pulled out her wallet. The clerk clearly remembered her and, even now, seemed to be in her head. He gave the package a curious glance before charging her credit card. He handed it back to her without bagging it.
“Can I have a bag?” she asked.
“Yeah of course,” he responded, clearly suspicious of her intentions, but unable to deny her request. He pulled out a plastic bag and handed it to her.
Abby took it and avoided his gaze as she slipped out of the drug store. On the way home, she tried to think of anything she needed to do before she downed the drugs and only ended up feeling worse when she couldn’t come up with something.
Abby changed into her nightgown and spent the next half hour staring at a glass of water and the line of white tablets she had painstakingly unpackaged. According to a major toxicology site, this was more than the LD50. It had also described an extremely miserable set of symptoms that Abby wasn’t looking forward to. There had to be a better solution, but for whatever reason, Abby couldn’t think of one.
She panicked when her brain told her any minute now she’d become someone’s sex slave again, and she downed the line of pills. According to what she read, she’d probably not feel a difference for a while, so she returned to her computer for a backup plan, since suffocating herself with a bag seemed unfeasible.
Every method she found seemed just out of reach. She wasn’t sure there was a tall enough building nearby to guarantee she’d die. All automated public transportation was some ways away. Walking into traffic wasn’t a reliable way to die and might kill other people. Abby didn’t want that. Finally, Abby stumbled upon what seemed like the perfect suggestion – slitting her wrists in a bathtub.
Abby made her way to the kitchen and from the wooden block on the counter she grabbed the biggest chef’s knife in the set. She made her way to the bathroom and started to fill the tub with hot water.
Once the tub was full, Abby got in without bothering to remove her nightgown. She held the knife and examined it for several minutes while revving herself up.
After the water started to cool down, Abby decided she was ready. She placed the blade’s edge lengthwise on her wrist and held her breath. She pressed down. A streak of red dribbled from the small incision. She cut a little deeper, then cried out in pain and dropped the knife. When it fell, the blade sliced through her gown and into her side as it slipped into the water. She looked at her wrist, and couldn’t imagine dying from such a small cut, but she couldn’t bring herself to pick the knife back up.
Abby sat immobile in the tub for another hour or so. The bleeding had stopped. All she had accomplished was staining her clothes and wasting another couple of hours while waiting for the drugs to kick in.
Abby knew she wanted to die, but she was fantastically terrible at making it happen. Eventually a thought occurred to her that would make the whole thing easier. She got out of the tub and tracked blood through her flat while looking for tape. She found a large roll of masking tape in one of the drawers in her kitchen and went back to her bedroom for the plastic bag.
Trying not to think about what she was doing, Abby placed the bag over her head and started taping it tightly around her neck. She wrapped it around and around several times, before realizing that the bag had a hole in it. Was that a safety feature? Why couldn’t the world just make this easier for her? Abby thought of the store clerk and decided he had poked a hole in the bag. Fuck him. She went over to her full-length mirror, found the hole with her hands, scrunched it up, and taped over it.
For a few seconds Abby felt proud of herself until the panic returned. Abby wasn’t going to let it stop her this time though. She told herself it was either now, or through liver failure later, which would be much more painful. She breathed hard and fast to waste the remaining oxygen in the bag as fast as she could.
After a minute or so she felt lightheaded, and it wasn’t long after that she lost her balance and fell. On the way down her head smacked into her nightstand and knocked her out.
Abby woke up confused. Why was she lying on the floor of her bedroom with a bag on her head? She felt the bag for holes and discovered a large gash. Her hand came back wet with blood.
Abby ripped the bag mostly off her head, but didn’t bother with the part that was firmly taped around her neck. She sunk to the floor. Rather than feeling relief, she felt even more hopeless. Could she not even kill herself? Was she that incompetent?
She looked at the clock. Not even 6 hours had passed since she took the tablets. This was going to take forever. Maybe longer than she had left. For all she knew, this was her last hour of freedom, and the person controlling her would come back and make her go to a hospital before her liver failed.
Time to get more drastic. Abby searched the internet for the tallest building nearby. There was a six-story hotel about a mile away. As long as she fell flat, she was fairly confident that it would work. It would be terrible to be paralyzed or have mangled legs.
Or maybe it wouldn’t. Maybe the person controlling her wouldn’t be so interested if she was broken. Anything was better than her current situation, and it was preferable to dying. Excited by the thought, Abby raced out of her flat still wearing her bloodstained nightgown and tape collar.
She ran to the edge of the complex before realizing her current state would probably draw too much attention. She looked down at her bare feet and thought about going back and changing. The scenario played out in her head of what would happen once she reached the hotel. She’d get some looks, say it was a costume, and be on her way. Or she’d just walk past the front desk like she already had a room and would jump from some other window if she couldn’t make her way to the roof.
It would easier if she were dressed differently, but Abby decided people would probably ignore her anyway. With that thought, she began walking from the complex to the hotel.
She started receiving various looks right away. Halfway to the hotel, someone told her that her costume was disgusting and she should actually kill herself. She considered snarkily asking for his help, but decided that wasn’t the best plan.
When she arrived at the hotel, she immediately regretted not going back and changing. This was clearly a high-class place, and Abby didn’t think her current attire was going to fly. Regardless, Abby pressed on through the revolving doors. She looked around for the elevators and began to hurry in that direction. Lucky for her, the front desk was a bit off to the side, and the bellman hadn’t noticed her.
She thought about getting a room on the top floor but then played the scenario out in her head. It was a terrible plan. And so, she snuck off to the elevators and pressed up.
The elevator dinged and opened a half minute later. Abby froze as a crowd emerged. Everyone stared at her as they got off, but thankfully no one said anything. Abby got in and pressed the top floor. The doors closed and opened again on the third floor.
An older, black gentleman joined her. He glanced at the elevator’s destination and then at Abby, putting two and two together, but he didn’t say anything.
They both got off on the sixth floor. Abby went in the opposite direction of the man and began looking for a staircase to the roof. She found one, but it only went down, so she doubled back and searched the other half of the floor. This time she succeeded. The stairs went up, but the door was locked.
Abby felt like screaming. There were no hallway windows for her to jump from and no way to get to the roof. She sat at the top of the stairs and cried.
“Are you okay, Miss?” came a heavily accented voice.
Abby sat up. An older woman holding a cigarette and wearing an apron was studying her. She ascended the staircase as Abby wiped her face dry and tried to think of a clever lie.
“No. I- my girlfriend left me. Doesn’t like me smoking all the time.”
The woman stared at Abby briefly before asking, “So you going to quit? Or do you want to join me and we can talk about it?”
Abby smiled and nodded. “Thanks, I’d like that. I probably should quit, but I just can’t right now.”
The lady helped her up and then pulled out a set of keys to unlock the door. As she began to open it a voice sounded from the sixth-floor staircase door, “Abby?”
Abby spun around. To her surprise, her ex-girlfriend Eva stared up at her.
The maintenance lady gave her a quick pat on the shoulder, “Why don’t you try working it out?” She then went out onto the roof and closed the door.
Abby, who had been briefly stunned into silence, started to panic as she realized her best opportunity had just been ruined. Eva kept her eyes locked on Abby as she climbed the stairs.
“What are you wearing?” Eva asked. “No never mind that. What are you doing at this hotel? Don’t you still live close by?”
Abby stared blankly at Eva.
“Do you want to come to my room?” Eva asked more softly, “Talk about what’s bothering you?”
The only thought that occurred to Abby was that Eva’s room might have a window.
“Yeah. That’d be nice,” Abby replied.
Eva helped Abby up and led her down the stairs to her room on the second floor. Abby’s heart sank with each flight they descended.
“What were you doing on the sixth floor?” Abby asked.
“Oh, I don’t know. I just had this urge to walk around a bit.”
“Well, what are you doing in town?” Abby asked more aggressively as they reached Eva’s room. She didn’t particularly care for Eva’s hospitality now that she knew her room would be of no use.
Eva opened the door, unfazed by Abby’s tone. She pulled Abby into the room and smiled slightly. “I wanted to see you.”
“You wanted to see me,” Abby repeated.
Eva nodded. She pulled Abby down to sit on the bed next to her.
“Is that blood?” Eva asked.
“Fake,” Abby responded. “Costume party.”
“Oh. That’s new,” Eva replied. “So, you like dressing up now?”
Abby noted her change in tone. She could see where Eva was hoping this would go.
“Yeah.”
“Who are you supposed to be? Carrie?” Eva asked.
“You know me,” Abby said with a smile. If she was going to be beyond saving by tomorrow, she might as well enjoy her last moments to the fullest.
“You want to clean up a bit? You can use the shower.”
“No, I want it to be like this,” Abby replied.
Eva smirked, “You want what to be like this?”
Abby smiled coyly back, “You going to make me beg for it?”
Eva dove for Abby’s lips, before pulling her onto the bed. Abby, being careful to hide her cut forearm, flipped on top of Eva. She started kissing Eva’s neck and traced her hands slowly across her skin, tasting every inch of her.
Abby did not get the luxury of drifting into a coma in her sleep.
“Good morning, darling,” Eva said between kisses.
Abby projectile vomited in her face.
Eva screamed and stumbled to the bathroom. She blubbered as she tried to wash the puke out of her eyes. Abby groaned. She felt absolutely terrible. Her abdomen screamed as she rolled off the bed and groaned.
Eva had managed to clean her eyes and was already dialing 112. “Hello. I think my girlfriend ingested something poisonous,” she said as she made her way around the bed towards Abby.
“No, I don’t know,” she said followed by, “Yeah, she’s here.”
Minutes passed before Eva said, “Okay.” She set the phone aside, though it was still connected. Eva sat cross-legged on the floor next to Abby as she continued to dry heave.
“Abby, what did you take?”
Abby shook her head.
“Abby this shit isn’t worth it. What did you take? How long ago did you take it?”
Abby shook her head again. Eva hung up the phone and leaned in close before saying, “Look Abby, if you want to die, I can’t stop you, but at least let me help you die differently, alright? I can get you some morphine. We can give you one last hurrah, and then you can do it painlessly if you still want to.”
Abby was gobsmacked. What did Eva just say? Her brain worked feverishly as it processed Eva’s request.
“If I tell you, do you promise to kill me with morphine by the end of today, no matter what I say after this?”
“What? I’m not going to kill you. I don’t want you to die, Abby,” Eva cried.
Abby shook her head. “Then no deal.”
“What? Fuck that, Abby. Tell me!”
Abby shook her head again before dry heaving a few more times.
“You- you- ah! Fine! You know what, fuck it!” Eva shouted before leaning in real close, “I’ll kill you with morphine by the end of the month, no matter what you say. I can’t get it by the end of the day.”
“Really?” Abby asked, clearly surprised.
Eva nodded. “I’m not going to let you die in pain.”
Abby rolled her eyes, “Can’t you just help me jump off this building or something?”
A look of realization dawned on Eva’s face. “That’s why you were here? And what is this?” she asked while pointing at the tape choker and then her wrist. “Did you fail to suffocate yourself and cut your wrists? Why is it so important that you die right now?”
“Because I won’t be able to later,” Abby answered.
“What the fuck are you talking about? Of course, you will.”
Abby just shook her head again.
“Fine. Whatever you want, just tell me what you took.”
“If you’re going to help me kill myself right now, why does it matter?” Abby asked.
“It’s give and take. I’m just supposed to help you kill yourself and you won’t even answer one of my questions?” Eva shot back.
“I- Please?” Abby asked.
Eva shook her head. “Nope. I deserve to know what’s going on.”
“Fine. Fuck. But you better promise me you’ll kill me.”
“Fine. I promise. But you’re going to tell me why.”
“Because,” Abby breathed deeply before continuing, “Since last March, someone has been controlling nearly everything I do, and I’m finally free from it for one day, and I don’t know how long I have left, and I really, really, really don’t want to go back to living like that, so before they get me again, I want to die.”
Eva didn’t look like she was buying her explanation, but she didn’t say anything to indicate that. She kept staring at Abby as if waiting for the punchline.
Abby stared into Eva’s eyes. They locked in that familiar old way, and Abby just knew, really knew, that Eva wasn’t trying to lead her on. She just wanted some mutual trust. Abby looked deep into Eva’s eyes and saw nothing but lovingkindness. Eva was much too good for her. Why had they broken up? It was over something so stupid. Eva gave her a small smile and Abby’s stubborn resolve broke.
“It was paracetamol. Sometime early yesterday afternoon.”
Eva leaned in and wrapped her arms around Abby. “Thank you for trusting me.”
Seconds later, Abby heard an ambulance. Of course, there was one. Eva couldn’t undo her call. About a minute later paramedics were rushing her outside. Eva communicated rapidly with them, but Abby couldn’t quite make out what she was saying. Hopefully she was trying to explain how this had all been a mistake. A man placed an IV in her arm after paramedics lifted her into the ambulance. Eva climbed in as well and grabbed her hand. Abby managed one last look before she slipped into unconsciousness.
“Is she okay? Can I see her?” a woman asked.
Abby slowly opened her eyes and took in her surroundings. She was in a sparsely-decorated small, white room. A nurse in the doorway let a couple of people in. Abby recognized them as her parents and closed her eyes. Fuck, she didn’t want to deal with this.
Abby pretended to be asleep for the remainder of their visit.
About an hour later, the only person she really wanted to talk to finally came into the room. Abby pretended to wake shortly after she arrived.
“Eva?” she said groggily.
“Oh, thank God,” Eva said, clearly relieved.
“So, I’m guessing I’m not going to die?” Abby asked.
“You sound disappointed.”
“I am. Kind of. I’m surprised I’m still in control of myself actually.”
“Yeah… about that,” Eva began.
“You don’t believe me? You just think I’m crazy?” Abby snapped.
“No, I didn’t say that. But apparently you were seeing a psychiatrist for some time and were diagnosed as bipolar?”
“I’m not bipolar. Someone was making me do things I didn’t want to do as some kind of sick game.”
“Right. Well, as you said, they aren’t doing that anymore, right?” Eva asked.
“Yeah, they aren’t,” Abby replied.
“How can you tell?”
“I can’t hear them. I’d be hearing the commands if I were being controlled.”
Eva stared at her before carefully replying, “So, you can’t hear a voice anymore telling you what to do?”
When Eva said it like that, it sounded extremely crazy, but Abby didn’t have a better way to describe her experience, so she just nodded.
“And the voice made you do all the normal stuff you’d do anyway?” Eva asked.
“Yeah, for the most part, but it made me do… other things to that I didn’t want to do,” Abby said softly.
Eva paused again, carefully crafting what she wanted to say, “So if you started to be controlled again, if I was around you, I would see you doing weird things that you wouldn’t normally do?”
“No.”
“Wait, I thought you just said that it made you do things you didn’t want to?” Eva objected.
“Yeah, at first it was probably pretty obvious,” Abby replied, “But after a while, they got good at it. I don’t think anyone would be able to tell.”
“But with how much detail?” Eva asked, “You can’t just like, think of a secret code or something with me, and I’ll know if you stop following it?”
“What?”
“Like, say we lived together, and I knew you would do something every morning a certain way. Then if you stopped doing it, I would know you were back to being mind-controlled.”
“That’s… yeah.”
“So, you think that would work?” Eva asked happily while grabbing one of Abby’s hands.
Abby’s face scrunched up, “Yeah probably, but then what? What if you find out I’m being mind-controlled?”
“Then I’ll tied you up until you tell me another password that means you’re back to normal.”
Abby started to tear up. It all seemed so simple. How had she not thought of something like that? There was only one problem left as far as she could see.
“Why would you want to live with me?” Abby choked out, “Especially after all I put you through?”
“Why do you think I flew halfway across the world? I’m not just going to dump you because you vomited in my face,” Eva said with a grin, “My eyes were burning for hours, by the way.”
Abby laughed. It sounded so strange.
Eva leaned in close and whispered, “You are the smartest, kindest, and fucking sexiest girl in the world. Maybe with everything that’s happened, you forgot that, but I’m going to remind you every day, okay?” She stood back up before finishing, “I’m extremely lucky to have met you, and nothing you do is going to make me stop chasing after you.”
Abby choked back fresh tears before realizing there was something that might put Eva’s declaration to the test. She managed to calm herself enough to ask, “What if… what if I caught something?”
It took Eva a second to realize what Abby meant. “Did you have a bunch of unprotected sex with strangers as a final hurrah?”
“Something like that,” Abby replied.
“We’ll figure it out. We’re in a hospital. Want to get tested?”
Abby nodded.
“I probably should get tested too, huh?” Eva laughed nervously.
Abby choked up again, “Sorry.”
“Stay right here. I’ll get the doctor and ask him about getting tested before we leave.”
“Wait!”
Eva turned to face Abby, already halfway out the door, “Yeah?”
“We need to do this code word thing as soon as possible.”
Eva closed the door again. “Okay. What do you suggest?”
Abby thought for a second before the right word came to her, “Mortal.”
“That’s what you need to say to me every time we meet? Isn’t it a bit obvious?”
“Yeah but I don’t want it to be too common either, so I wouldn’t accidentally say it when I’m being controlled. It really should be a subtle action, but we’re not in a routine yet.”
Eva paused a moment before suggesting, “What if we did something like this?” Eva walked over to Abby and intertwined their fingers. “It’s normal and subtle,” she began. Eva then laced their fingers together differently in a way that would be hard to notice if you weren’t one of the two holding hands. Eva gazed into Abby’s eyes before finishing, “but specific. If you don’t grab hold of my hand in this specific way, I’ll know I need to tie you up the first chance I get. After that, a code word to indicate everything is alright should be enough, since my full attention will be on you until you say it.”
Abby’s throat tightened up again at Eva’s proposal, “And what should I say?”
“How about, ‘I’m Carrie again?’” Eva said with a grin.
Abby replied, “That’s perfect.”
The following weeks overflowed with good news. The universe was determined to be fair-handed with Abby after all that it had put her through. Abby and Eva came back negative on their STI panels. Eva convinced Abby to communicate with her parents, and they all came out better for it. Eva moved in with Abby and got a job at the hospital as a nurse. Abby took a couple of weeks off to be with Eva and clean up her flat. Over the course of those two weeks, Abby developed a very specific set of habits for Eva to keep track of. Since Eva had a hand in forming many of them, the habits ended up being quite intimate, which only helped to speed along Abby’s recovery.
Wake up to the alarm; roll over into a kiss. Wait while Eva readied the shower; join her exactly five minutes later. Before getting dressed, make Eva two sunny-side-up eggs and some black tea. Serve her breakfast with another kiss and then get ready for the day.
Days folded together with ease until Abby’s birthday came up, and Eva insisted that they go out drinking. There were only a couple decent bars nearby, so it was impossible to avoid The Roost. Abby managed to enjoy herself, but avoided consuming too much alcohol. As the night wore on, she lapsed in and out of the events from that terrible night. By the time they were ready to leave, Abby had made up her mind.
As they exited the bar Abby turned to Eva and said, “I need to go somewhere. Follow me?”
Eva, who was drunk enough to be game for pretty much anything, grinned and nodded.
Abby traced each fateful step in her memory, and before long, she found herself at the dirt road.
“Hey. Where is this? Where we going?” Eva asked.
“We’re going to a place I was led to when I was being mind controlled,” Abby answered quietly.
“What? Not a good idea. Let’s go back home and keep the party going!”
But Abby had already begun walking down the dirt road.
“Okay, fine. But I pick the next place, okay?” Eva conceded as she followed a few steps behind.
Hours passed and Eva started to sober up. “Where are we going again?” she asked.
“A castle.”
“A castle? You’re fucking with me, aren’t you? I’m not drunk anymore, Abby. It’s not going to work!” she exclaimed a little too happily.
“I’m not. We’re getting close, so you’ll be able to see for yourself,” Abby said. The path was barely recognizable at this point, so Abby was certain they were going the right way.
But they never found it.
Abby led Eva around in circles in the middle of nowhere until she had sobered up enough to start objecting. “Hey, Abby… I believe you, but what if we just can’t find it? You said first it was some ruins, then it became a full castle? Well, we could be walking passed it if they could just make it look like it wasn’t there.”
Abby knew she was right. She had begun to think that herself, but Eva’s comment solidified her fears. They weren’t going to be able to find the castle. Abby sat down on the ground, exhausted from all the walking, and glanced up at Eva. “Yeah, you’re probably right. But then how did I find it the first time?”
“You said it yourself. You were led there.”
“Yeah, but… I don’t know. There seems like there’s more to it than that.”
Eva gave Abby a puzzled look before offering her a hand to help her up. “Come on let’s get back home. We’ll plan this out a bit better after a good night’s sleep.”
"Okay,” Abby replied as she pulled herself up by gripping Eva’s hand.
Weeks passed without any progress on finding the mysterious castle. Eva tried to talk Abby out of searching, but Abby continued. The only thing that managed to stop her singular focus was when Eva approached her one afternoon after getting off the phone.
“I’ve got to fly back home,” she said solemnly. “My mom is dying, and she doesn’t have much time left.”
“Wow… I’m sorry, Eva. When do you want to go? I’ll get us some tickets and we’ll fly out as soon as we can.”
“I’ve already got a ticket. My dad bought me one. It leaves in the morning.”
“Oh. Well, I’ll get one for myself then, and we’ll meet up in the airport?”
“Yeah. Okay.”
“Here. Let’s get your stuff ready.”
Abby spent the rest of the afternoon helping Eva get her packed for her flight. Abby couldn’t find a ticket to that particular part of Canada until two weeks later, and even then, it was way out of her budget.
“It’s okay,” Eva replied when Abby told her she couldn’t afford it. “I don’t expect I’ll be gone long. You’re out of sick leave anyway, right?”
“Yeah, but… I want to be there for you.”
Eva smiled. “You’re here for me right now. And you’ll be here for me when I get back.”
“Eva… I don’t mean to make this about me, but… what about our code?”
“Oh, I guess we’ll have to come up with a new one. How about you give me a call at exactly at exactly 8 pm BST every night starting tomorrow.”
Abby smiled. “Of course.”
But when Abby called, Eva didn’t answer. Abby called the next day, the day after, and the one after that. It went straight to voice mail every time.
As each day passed and Abby continually failed to get a response, she began to suspect that Eva had just made an excuse to leave her. After the second week, Abby left a final voice message. “This is a really shitty thing to do, you know. Don’t worry, I’m not going to kill myself, but seriously, if you don’t have the best fucking excuse in the entire world when I see you again you can fuck right off.” She hung up and tossed her phone on the bed.
The next morning, Abby went to the doctor’s office for a checkup. An old, black gentleman approached her.
“Hello Abby. Do you have a minute to spare? I have a proposition for you.”
“Um… excuse me for being rude, but who the hell are you?”
“I suppose that’s as good a place to start as any,” the man said before sitting in the chair next to Abby’s. “I’m a dean of a very special—I guess you could call it—university.”
“Not interested,” Abby responded immediately.
“Hold on, hear me out. It won’t cost you anything to attend, but we are very selective. Most people don’t have what it takes to make it anywhere in our university, so to spare them all the frustration, we vet the ones out with no latent ability without them even knowing. You’ve made it through that vetting.”
“Should I be flattered? What’s the catch? You can’t just let a bunch of people live and attend a university for free. That’s not profitable,” Abby asked skeptically, though her curiosity was increasing.
“No, you’re right. Most people do pay, but you would be on a scholarship of sorts.”
“With what strings? And you still didn’t tell me what subjects you teach. Why would I go if I don’t care about the material?”
The man offered a smile that said he was trying to delicately drop a bomb, “We teach… techniques of the mind.”
Abby froze. This man went from being a harmless loony with half her attention to the center of her universe in less than a second. “Like what?” she failed to ask in a casual manner.
“Mind control and how to resist it as well as all the various forms that takes on. There are quite a lot of branches, but that’s the gist of it. You would get a full scholarship on the condition that you help us do one thing while you are at the school.”
“Which is?” Abby managed to ask.
The man thought for a moment before deciding to throw caution to the wind, “We are under the impression that you were being controlled at some point by a few of our students. Mind control is a tricky art. In the right hands, it can be hugely beneficial, but there is obviously an immense potential for abuse. We believe there is a group of students at our school who are profiting off our teachings in illegal ways, however, because of the nature of mind control, this becomes extremely hard to prove or even to verify. We believe that you somehow managed to retain your memories of this abuse of power, and that you could help us identify the culprits.”
Abby started to hyperventilate during his explanation. Toward the end she managed to calm herself down. “How the fuck, can mind control be hugely beneficial?”
“Because it’s not really mind control per se, that’s just a single branch of technique that has its own use cases. Most of what we teach isn’t best described as mind control. It’s permissive and incredibly useful. I would describe it as mind sharing.”
Abby stared at the man. Her face twisted, probably in disgust, she couldn’t tell.
The man’s face indicated he knew she needed to be convinced in a different way, “You don’t need to participate in anything you don’t feel comfortable doing. But we do feel you would be a great fit for our school, and that we could really use your help in righting a series of wrongs. Without your help, it might continue for years without us making any progress.”
Abby’s face rearranged itself into a stoic one. “I can’t help. I have no idea what they look like. All I heard was the name Mark, which probably isn’t even the name of any person that’s involved.”
The man looked sternly at Abby before confidently replying, “You absolutely can help. You think you can’t identify a person you haven’t seen? That’s just because you have a lot to learn. If you come to our school, the one thing I can guarantee is that you will be extremely helpful in catching these people.”
“If I can identify them without seeing them, why can’t you just look into my brain and get the information you need and move on?” Abby asked.
The man nodded. “That’s a good question. The short of it is, any additional information I seem to learn about these people’s identities, I forget immediately. They are quite careful. However, you managed to retain some memories of what happened. This leads me to believe that you will be able to retain new information about the investigation, and help to move it along.”
“Wait you can’t even remember anything new that you learn? How do I know you won’t entirely forget there is an investigation?”
“That is a legitimate concern. I’m afraid I don’t have a satisfactory answer to that, other than I would usually consider myself to be among the best in the world at this art, and that whatever is effecting my ability to learn is limited in scope. I don’t believe it is capable of causing me to forget things that I have learned after a certain amount of time.”
Abby had a million more half-formed questions, but it seemed as though the man was closing up his case, “You have about a month before the semester starts. If you decide you would like to attend before then, I will personally come get you and fill you in on everything you need to know.”
“How will I tell you?” Abby asked before immediately feeling stupid.
The man smiled at her as he left the room.
Not even a day had passed before Abby had made up her mind. However, the man didn’t return. Abby began to wonder if she confabulated that conversation to make sense of everything that had happened to her.
It was exactly twenty-nine days later when the man returned, subsiding all her doubts. He walked up to her as she was leaving the department store at the end of her shift.
“Follow me,” he said as he opened a door that hadn’t been there a second ago.
Abby followed. The door slammed shut behind them of its own accord. They twisted and turned down a dark corridor that closely resembled the one in the castle. The man stopped in front of a door and opened it. He left it drifting open, and so Abby followed him inside.
He turned around and spoke, “Welcome to my office. I’m here to answer any questions you have and guide you through the orientation process. I’ll also explain how to use the private communications channel that I’ve set up until you learn how to contact me directly.”
“So, I get to ask you anything? And you’ll answer it?” Abby asked.
“If I know the answer, I will give it to you.”
Abby nodded. “Okay then. Do you know what happened to Eva? Was she mind-controlled away?”
The man frowned. “That’s rather a tough one to start with. I will answer it, but first can we get some basic courtesies out of the way?”
Annoyed, Abby answered, “Yeah. Fine.”
“Well, first, my name is Dr. Balewa. I am not a teacher at this school, but I do organize it. And you are?”
Abby raised her eyebrows. Didn’t he already know everything about her? “I’m Abby. I work at a department store.”
Dr. Balewa laughed. “You don’t do yourself justice. Anyway, I’ll answer your first question now. Try not to get upset.”
Abby’s skin prickled at the ominous warning. She sat down in the chair in front of Dr. Balewa’s desk, and he followed suit.
“Eva never left Canada. She still hates you for all the same reasons she did before. If you recall, I bumped into you in the hotel elevator. I discovered who you were then and conjured a fictional image of Eva in your mind to prevent you from killing yourself.”
The floor fell out from under Abby. Her mind swam in a torrent. Then the water stilled, and her feet firmly replanted themselves into the floor.
“I don’t mean to be invasive, but it’s best if you remain dispassionate and cognizant throughout this conversation, and to do that, you’ll need my help.”
Abby nodded. “Of course. What about this school. What will I be learning?”
“Well first and foremost, you’ll be learning how to defend yourself against the more nefarious techniques. Until then, you will wear special robes that prevent you from being controlled. There are different colors. Each color represents a different level of achievement. The first three will prevent you from being controlled. You will not get the color after that until you are found to be capable of defending yourself.”
“Okay,” Abby replied as if all of this made perfect sense. “What other subjects are there? You mentioned that this was useful for something other than forced slavery and defending yourself from forced slavery.”
“Yes. Like I said, this is really the art of connecting minds. You had the worst introduction possible to this skill, so it may be a bit harder for you to see the beauty. But I digress. You specifically asked what it is useful for. Well for one, I am capable of instantly communicating with anyone I’ve met anywhere in the world. I am able to examine and change the architecture of my own mind to perfectly empathize with their situation, and then I can find the single cure out of trillions to address their particular mental state. In your case, I saw your talent. I saw your pain, and I led you down the single path where you survived. But I would like to stress that beyond the arrogant use cases there is another layer of humanity. I feel, connect, and love on a deeper level. It’s hard to describe in words to someone who hasn’t experienced it, but I promise you that learning this art will never be something that you regret.”
Abby swallowed hard as she took in everything Dr. Balewa said.
When she didn’t respond, he continued, “You don’t have to participate in any classes that you don’t want to.” He pulled out a small sheet of paper and handed it to her. “Here is your schedule. Even if you plan on forgoing a subject, I ask that you at least attend the classes as often as possible. If you don’t have any more questions, we’ll get you your robes, and I’ll show you to your room. Feel free to explore the castle and find the classrooms you’ll be going to tomorrow. I’ll leave you be for the first week to let you orient yourself, but expect to hear from me regularly after that. I’ll introduce you to the rest of the investigation team, and we’ll go from there.”
Abby nodded. This was good information, but it was a lot to take in at once, so she was glad he was giving her space. She just had one last set of questions. “So, this is all real? Then how did we get here so fast? We’re in the castle, right? But we shouldn’t be too far from the department store.”
Dr. Balewa waited for her to finish before replying, “Yes, this is all real, but no, the journey here was not. We are quite far from where you work. For obvious reasons, we try to keep the location of this university secret. For less obvious reasons, we keep it secret from the students as well. It’s a precaution that generally prevents them from bringing in outsiders against their will. Clearly, it’s not a perfect system, and you’ll need to know where we are at for the sake of the investigation, but for now, it’s best you take the same path as everyone else.”
“So how do I know this is all real?”
“Well for now, you don’t. But you’ll develop that skillset quickly. Just know that when you are in possession of these,” Dr. Balewa said as he removed a set of white robes from the closet behind his desk, “that you will be fully in control of yourself.”
And with that, he led Abby from his office to the dormitories. He pushed a door open and Abby peered into her new dorm room. It was larger than she had expected with its own bathroom and two enormous, lush beds. Seeing it reminded her of another question she had forgotten to ask, “What about my current apartment?”
“I’ll take care of it,” Dr. Balewa replied. “You’ll still have it to go back to should you decide you’ve had enough of this place.”
“And my job?”
“Same for your job.”
Abby turned around and offered him her hand. “Thank you… for this opportunity.”
He gave her hand a quick shake. “Of course. Thank you for agreeing to it.”
And with that, they parted ways. Abby got herself situated in her room and adorned one of her new white robes before leaving to explore the castle.
It was just as beautiful as she remembered it. Abby spent the remainder of the afternoon exploring. Occasionally she ran into other students. Most of them were wearing white, so Abby assumed they were new and exploring the castle like she was.
The evening came in a flash, and Abby went back to her room, laid down, and tried not to think about what the next day would bring.