Tons of security rush into the domicile
"What's going on here?"
"It was reported you're building bombs!"
"Oh, I'm making bath bombs."
"Explosives to use while you wash??"
"No, fizzy little balls to add to a bath for aromatherapy."
"It was reported as a Bomb."
"The eavesdropper needs to learn to listen to the entire conversation." -- Anon Guest
"Explosives are not permitted in enclosed vessels," intoned the guard. "We still have to inspect the process and the product."
Human Liz sighed and rolled their eyes. "It's all ordinary household chemicals. Harmless ones. I promise." They showed each and every one of the ingredients, explained the process, and underlined that this was something harmless, if not Havenworlder-safe[1].
"We know about Humans and ordinary household chemicals," rumbled the guard. His face and demeanour implacable.
Liz filled a bucket with water, and produced one of their finished bath-bombs. "It's really very harmless," they said, and placed it in.
They all watched, fascinated as the bucket filled with plumes of colour and fizzy bubbles, some of which lingered on the surface. A fruity scent began to waft up.
"Oh no what a hideously hazardous explosive," Liz deadpanned in deep sarcasm. "I obviously need to prepare this shit in a shed in a disused quarry in the middle of [BOVINE EXCREMENT] nowhere."
"We don't appreciate mockery of our duties," warned the guard.
"I'm mocking the eavesdropper who heard the wrong thing and jumped to the wrong conclusion. I know Humans have fun and games with ordinance but we're not reckless enough to blow ourselves and everyone around us the flakk up, okay?"
"Some Humans have been known to do so."
"I'm not those Humans."
"We still have to make sure." The guard scanned everything anyway. And noted the report down as a false alarm. Duty done, he lingered, "Do you have tropical-scented ones?"
[1] Different species have differing definitions of 'harmless'.
[Photo by Steve Huntington on Unsplash]
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