What kind of kind of man leaves his sick wife in bed, takes a walk down the hall to cheat on her with an old friend in the guest room of the same house? Pastor Declan was such a man.
(This is a post by @Vanessahampton because she won a spot on my blog by winning the Minnow Support Saturday. She will receive 50% of the total payout of thist post. You can read the earlier parts of her "Desirable Sin" series by clicking on the parts below)
Read Desirable Sin Part 1
Read Desirable Sin Part 2
Read Desirable Sin Part 3
Read Desirable Sin Part 4
He rubbed his eyes and turned away from the window to study his wife of six years. Casey had never been a particularly strong woman and over the years her long battle with cancer had taken its toll.
Sweet and beautiful. With a black heart.
The most shameful part? The memory of Angela's tight, liquid heat closing around him like a glove refused to leave him.
Even now, when he was supposed to be remorseful, it was all he could do not to dream of a repeat.
God, would he jump at a chance of a repeat. She had given him the best night of his life.
At Casey's expense.
Regardless of what she might have done, he was under obligation to respect her. That Esther might not be his didn’t matter. Esther was his in the only way that mattered.
He could still recall holding her tiny, wrinkled body at birth. She would run to him to soothe her hurts. He’d been there to hold her whenever she tottered.
But Declan couldn’t begin to wrap his head around his own sin. He was supposed to take the high road. That Casey cheated on him with her brother didn’t clear him of wrongdoing.
To make matters worse, Esther had walked in on them. What would he tell his young, impressionable daughter?
At least, he had been spared the shame of answering Esther’s question. The morning had gone crazy immediately after the loud crash that saved him from Esther’s third degree.
He’d rushed into their room to find Casey on the floor. Thankfully, the guilt and fear of losing Casey at a time like this were enough to get his mind off Angela.
Sweet Angela.
Declan bit back a harsh laugh. Running a hand down the side of his face, he brought his mind back to Casey and quietly vowed to never leave her side for the next six months.
Casey moaned and he rushed to her side, dropping to his knees and taking her fragile fingers carefully.
His mouth worked, the fear in his heart receded somewhat and he forced a smile. “Hey.”
Casey gave a weak smile in return and turned her face away. Declan smoothed the tendrils of soft blond hair at her temples.
Hers was a pale gold color compared to Angela’s vibrant honey blond locks. A wave of dizziness hit Declan and the taste of vomit pooled in his mouth.
He lurched from his wife’s bedside, ran to the restroom attached to his wife’s room and vomited. Wiping a hand over his mouth, Declan grimaced. He caught his reflection in the mirror and froze.
He looked like what he was-- a hypocrite and a self-righteous bigot. What would he tell Esther?
That desire so fierce he couldn’t control it held him so fast and didn’t let go until he had his fill of Angela?
That he’d chosen a former drug addict over his sweet wife? Who said she wasn’t still on drugs anyway. He better get tested as soon as possible, Declan decidedly grimly.
When he walked into Casey’s room moments later, he was shocked to find her seated and waiting for him. Declan walked to her side.
“You shouldn’t be up,” he muttered anxiously.
She gave him an arch look. “Should I not? Her eyes sought his. “That and marrying a strong man who upheld family and Christian values.”
Declan’s stomach roiled and he swallowed hard to tamp down the urge to throw up. He clenched his fist and closed his eyes.
“I don’t deserve you--”
“No, I don’t deserve you,” Casey said. “You left a glorious career as a basketball star and moved to the country close to my parents where I’d have the best care possible. Despite my relationship with--”
“Cas--”
Her eyes hardened. “I refuse to live in the clouds Declan. Yes, I love my brother and had his child. You slept with the woman you’ve always loved in our guest room.” She raised. “What difference does it make?”
Declan winced. “I--”
“How’s Esther?” She winced and pressed a hand to her temple.
“Don’t worry about anything, not now. She’s fine,” Declan said through taut lips.
Casey sought his eyes. “Declan?”
“Yes?”
“I meant what I said earlier.”
Declan stared hard at his wife. Which of the words? The one about Esther not being his, her going back to continue her incestuous relationship with her brother, or not caring about Esther? As Declan looked into Casey’s eyes, he saw the answer. Yes, to all his questions.
She clenched her fist around the sheets and raised her chin. “What did the doctor say?”
Declan froze. “You always were too anxious about the littlest things--”
“My life isn’t little Declan.”
Declan nodded. “You need to rest so you can resume duty as--”
“Your weak housewife?”
Declan forced a smile. “So being my wife makes you weak, I never knew the position was such a bad one.”
Casey rolled her eyes. “You know what I really want.”
Declan wanted to shake some sense into her. “He doesn’t care, he never has and he never will.”
She stiffened. “I don't want you here. I have never wanted you. Go back to your Angela and get me Yando."
At the mention of her name, Declan's body hardened. He closed his eyes and shuddered. He tried to think of something else, anything but the fact his wife just gave him permission to have the repeat with Angela, and failed.
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