I rose at 5 am, drank two glasses of water, and ventured out into the summer morning for a 10 km run. It was still and fresh, the sky a pale blue, crows flocking blackly overhead. But the run was difficult. My limbs felt heavy and slow and I sort of shuffled along, my arms like lead weights. By kilometer 5 I wanted to give up; I wanted to give up for much of the distance. If it's so difficult, maybe I should go home and rest and try another long run next week, I thought.
But I kept going, slowly slowly, walking up hills. I remembered that this is exactly what I wanted to be doing. I was doing the thing I promised myself I would. That's huge! I remembered that I chose to do this because I want to love myself and moving my body is one of the most powerful ways to do that.
This is me loving myself, I repeated over and over as I slogged along. This is me doing exactly what I want to be doing. I finished the run with that mantra in my head.
I was discouraged by my 8:26/km pace until I remembered that I can only do what I can do (run) and to stop worrying about the rest (pace). I have nothing to be ashamed of and everything to celebrate. I ran 10 km!
I felt fantastic for the rest of the day. 