I find sometimes that forgiveness comes more easily to me when I can understand the other person's intentions. I like to assume that people by nature do not have ill-intentions, but it helps hearing it directly from them. Will I like their answer or agree with them? Maybe not. But at least I'll understand them.
I do wonder, though, if it's possible to forgive without that understanding.
RE: Radical Forgiveness: The Master Key That Bridges All Traditions