1. When you accept yourself for who you are, sharing it with others feels like a rush.
Being who you really are invites others to do the same. I was telling my roomamate a very personal story about my sex life. And a female friend walked in midway through. Instead of changing the subject, I used it as an opportunity to grow even more comfortable with being myself openly.
Midway through my story she chimed in and shared a story of her own where she actually called out the wrong guys name during sex. It was so cool to break down the custom of trying to look good in front of one another and avoid all embarrassment. By sharing honest moments with each other and feeling comfortable. It really made me feel closer to everyone in the room. And the world in general.
2. Once you get over the initial resistance it's smooth sailing.
Insecurity is like a sell wall. Once you eat through that resistance you see yourself differently, you're no longer held back by your insecurity. So your self-esteem goes up and up and up. Even when you hit a new level of resistance you still see yourself differently because you know you can overcome this too! Just like when a stock or a cryptocurrency hits a new all time high, people begin to see it as worth more, even if it drops. Because they've seen it's potential and expect it to go back.
3. The world beyond insecurity is replete with love.
I wasn't sure what was on the other side of the door of insecurity, but the floodgates that I opened showed me a world well beyond my habits of playing small. My heart was not ready for all the love it would find.
Manifesting a relationship that was rooted in unconditional love has been amazing. Imagine being able to share anything with someone, and knowing that it'll be met with love. Even if she has resistance initially, you trust her enough to move past that place and find an even greater love because your sharing helped her expand her love as well.
And you can love her purely too. Nothing she says will ever make you feel distant because you know that anything you can do, we can do better. She brings out the best in you and you bring out the best in her. And that is something worth keeping even if you tap into deep and murky waters, unable to see your way through. The love that you have for each other will act like a guiding light. And the more you work through together, the more trust you build that you can do anything together.
4. You don't have to be perfect to get what you want.
When I look back on the things I've written this last week, I noticed typos and poorly worded sentences, but it doesn't matter. The feeling of where I was coming from and what I was hoping to accomplish came across. And the reader feels that more than they care about perfection.
As the saying goes, "making mistakes is better than faking perfection." Mistakes bring us together to take care of anything that needs attention. Perfection drives us apart because it's so much easier for someone to seem perfect at a distance, so to maintain that illusion of perfection we must maintain our distance.
Furthermore, since we know ourselves so much better than most others, we will always appear to be less perfect than they are. Unless they're willing to be as as authentic and open with us as we are with ourselves.
5. My heart aches when my mind filters and silences it.
I wish I could just turn off my head sometimes. And when I can, I find this state of flow where such beautiful things come out. The insidious thing about logic is that it makes sense, and therefore it feels important. Logic will always win it's own logical arguments. So It's up to you to decide that the things that can't be measured by logic are important too. If you can give your heart a seat at the table without it needing to battle your mind, you'll find that the two compliment each other beautifully.
6. Don't look at your insecurity for how bad it is, it will always look bad when you're in an insecure place. Instead look at it as how good it will feel to release that insecurity and gain access to everything beyond it.
Some things appear unattractive from where you're sitting (like getting up to exercise when you're feeling lazy), but once you get in the swing of things, you realize how good it feels to exercise your power.
Feeling alive is so much more fulfilling than staying comfortable. Especially when that aliveness leads you to something you so strongly desire that wild horses couldn't hold you back.
7. What you're wanting is probably something you could've had years ago. You just weren't ready for it yet.
How soon you are ready for something is never matter of time, it's a matter of choice: To either face down the things that are holding your back and being willing to see them in a more empowering light; or stay cowered in the corner, unable to stand up and be who you really are.
The choice is yours and yours alone. But the moment you make the choice to see what's truly possible for you, unseen joys become visible. Open your eyes to loving your insecurities, and your insecurities will open your world to all the love that awaits you.
Thanks for reading!
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Embrace Your Insecurities, The Full Series:
Day 0: Exceed Your Love Limits
Day 1: Coming Out of the Closet
Day 2: The Transformative Power of Insecurity
Day 3: Opening the Door to Love
Day 4: Sexual Incompatibility and Innovation
Day 5: Insecurity and Getting Out of Your Comfort Zone
Day 6: Eat Shit and Thrive