This is just another day in my life in this lousy city, but last night was the straw that broke the camel's back.
I'd just generated a boatload of new funds yesterday and was feeling proud as I mapped out how to put them to good use. I also had a nice baseball workout in the cages, did some sprints, and had another workout with weights at home. Two nice Craiglist pick-ups on an upcycled inflatable PUP board and large commercial rug extractor were also scheduled for extra cash. Most importantly, they'd create space for a new storage shelf unit a friend wants to give me (big win for a city apt).
Tired from the day (I also thrifted), I was about to go to bed early, proud of conquering the day with the opportunity to make several new sizable investments. I was happy to recharge and hit the gym hard after a good night's sleep.
...Then my friend texted me telling me to meet her and her girlfriends two blocks away at a piano bar. She's an amazing singer, and I enjoy when she sings a few tunes with the piano, so I figured I'd rally for a nightcap. The two baseball teammates I gigged with last week were also going to come, so I dragged myself out to "live a little more."
Quick shower... 3 minutes on foot... enter piano bar around 12:30am.
Time With Friends -> Disgust:
The girls weren't there yet, so I stood by the bar chatting with my two baseball/music friends. Being around live music wakes me up, so I was glad I pulled myself out of bed (then). I'd just knocked the day out of the park and should celebrate, right?
After a few minutes, a decently attractive blonde walks right up to me (aka into me).
My two friends fled. Thanks, guys...
She was German and very forward. Sigh...
- Are you married?
- Are you single?
- How?
- What's wrong with you?
- Kids?
- Are you gay?
- Wait, why are you single again?
- Can I buy you a drink?
- How old are you?
- Can you hold my heels?
- Wait, you're really not married?
- What are you looking for in a woman?
- Do you like to kiss?
After this barrage, I asked her if she might want to know my name.
I wanted to FLEE, but she bought me a drink and I didn't want to insult her. She had a bit to drink before, so I didn't to make waves...
I'd sent a text to my friend to save me in a few minutes (the girls had arrived by then). She either didn't see it or was enjoying the entertainment of me trapped/struggling to find an out with the others.
As the onslaught continued, she tried to hold my hand and kiss me.
SOS text sent. More smiles and laughs from across the bar.
I know I'm too nice, so it takes a lot for me to do this, but it got to the point that I simply grabbed my jacket, thanked her for the drink I was half done with, and excused myself. I joined my friend who all had jokes, and then sat down near the piano to get back to enjoying myself.
Sidebar:
Last week was the same tune at the casino bar. I went to get a drink after my first set and the bartender's first words were: "Are you single and do you have kids?" My friend behind me there thinks... here's her number...
Umm, can I please just have a drink and focus on the show I'm trying to play on 28 hours' notice?
After the third set, and the bartender giving me and only me double and triple whiskeys (my band mates all got charged), she got me to text her friend. Her friend then immediately asked "How old?"... "Kids?" She then invited me to go on a camping trip with her this weekend to a music festival. How about starting with "Nice drumming tonight!" Not my speed. Sigh.
Torture:
Anyway, back to last night. My friend's girlfriends were little brats.
It takes a lot for me to say that, but they were. Sorry if you ever see this, Nicole! They were drunk, loud, and obnoxious. My friend is amazing (hope you see this, Nicole!), but these other girls were Tazmanian devils. Nicole invited me to hang out with them this weekend, but no way, Jose.
At one point, one of the girls kept calling the bar manager a crazy bitch rather loudly, so I told her to calm down and relax. It was disrespectful and uncalled for. That's when her other friend (they're both 26, mature and wise), lashed at me with demonic eyes to shout that you "NEVER TELL A GIRL TO CALM DOWN AND RELAX!" She got nasty with all talons out. It's ok, been there before... I'm immune to this bullshit, but I just wanted to enjoy myself, and the chances of that were fading fast.
Hooray...
The two girls then started barking to each other about the gall I had to say such a crazy thing, so loudly that I walked right up to them, tapped the offended on the shoulder and started a discussion about why SHE went haywire. Her response was uncalled for. After she tried to shame and embarrass me more, I eventually got her to realize that she misunderstood why I told her friend what I did and she retracted her talons. She saw the light and could see why I stood up for the manager. I was in the right, and not going to let them drag me through the mud over nothing.
Yes, I made a drunk brat with her drunk best friend realize she was out of line, right in the line of fire... MatthewTheresa level stuff.
She may have apologized, but I clinked my glass on her beer bottle with a "let's move on," as an olive branch for insurance. My name was cleared.
The only reason I felt it was necessary to do this was because my friend Nicole (the singer) is best friends with these two girls, so I didn't want to cause a rift there. Otherwise, I'd never waste my time with them in a million years.
Hindsight Rant:
After experiencing these two divine interactions, I wasn't in a good mood. I should've stayed home.
Other drunk guys at the bar (a nice small piano bar), had to get kicked out by my friend who's a Federal Agent. It was chaos. The piano player refused to play as drunk morons danced, shouted the lyrics, made obnoxious comments/insults, tried to take the microphone and sit down at the piano countless times. It was so childish and disrespectful.
So instead of being well rested and with a solid gym workout, I was up late and didn't go to the gym today. I've also spent this time writing about last night instead of enjoying the good vibes from before going out yesterday.
Why do I go to bars again? Why do I live in a city where this behavior is so prevalent and socially accepted?
Where are the normal people that offer real connections and substance... who know how to treat people well and with respect? You know, good people who value quality friendships and relationships, who proactively seek and invest in them, with real values? Who have class and are willing to build something properly without evaluating my stats or expecting something right off the bat?
...People who still know how to make a phone call, check in, share their time, or jut show they care? ...Those who don't throw themselves at you or treat you like a freak for having standards and waiting for the right person. ...Someone responsible, mature and secure, who doesn't go out to get drunk and sloppy.
I barely come across these unicorns in my day-to-day these days. Is life really that hard or complex to make this normalcy such a rarity? Has society reshaped people to forget human interaction in lieu of their social media/cell phones? It feels like a sickness to me.
I have no problem connecting with real people, but there seem to be so few of them where I live, and that's discouraging.
This sounds like a bad night, but it’s fairly common when I try to go out and socialize.
This is why I want to move far away from here.
A Craiglist pickup is here now for $170 cash on a recycled find, and then I'm off to the third row behind the visitor's dugout at a Major League Baseball game.
I felt it was good to get this crap out of my system to enjoy the game tonight. It's just a rant. Forgive the imperfections.
Thanks for your support and thoughts if you didn't fall asleep reading this,
