I think of myself as an observant man. A man who studies the world around him and develops spot on generalizations of my observations. While cruising in my boring Ford Fusion listening to non-douche music, I have observed the style of driving of these 3 douchebag mobiles.
3. Audi
This car brand barely made it on but drivers and the car itself tend to have douchey characteristics such as tinted windows, horrible music, leaning back in their seats in a perceived "cool" like manner, but the driver's face always fits the douche look. For some reason, Audi drivers always look like they have the first name Chase, Landon, or Drew.
2. BMW
You may see a running theme already here but hey I can't help what I observe. BMW drivers usually kick it up a notch from Audi drivers. Similar characteristics and a notch higher on the entitlement scale. What do you mean by entitlement, you may ask? I mean they feel the entire road is entitled to them and we just merely exist so we better get the fuck out of the way. Their faces fit the douche spectrum as well.
1. Mercedes-Benz
Holy hell this one takes the cake! As you can see the theme is complete with German cars. I have nothing against them but douchey people tend to drive them at higher probabilities. It's science, I'm sorry. These drivers max out the entitlement scale. They truly believe the roads were paved with them in mind and our peasant cars are merely obstacles to get around. They don't necessarily have the douche face but they just exude it. To add to it, they have that snob look to them because they make a bit more money than us common folk.
Honorable Mentions
Jacked-up Trucks
This would have made the list but obviously it is not a brand. Hey! it's not German though. This is driven by the Douche-Hick. High on the entitlement spectrum and stomping on the gas pedal to make their truck as loud as possible nails the douche factor. Big American flags just add to the image.
Harley Davidson
This is not even a car but every time they do that stupid hand wave it pisses me off so they made the list.