For my first post I will not be going back through my story, instead I want to start a discussion and hear your thoughts about something which came up on my facebook feed a few months ago. I wanted to write this up since. That' how it went:
Question-What is the protocol when Face book friends die-Do we delete profile?
That's where a very deep conversation started between me and a friend who I lived with and haven't seen for six years. I found this question deeply personal as well truly philosophical.
In a space of three years I lost two of my best friends one to HIV and one to suicide and mental illness. Both were very close. I used to run events with my friend Fedro and he was a music producer. There were a few good friends in our circle and we went under the name Brainwaves Productions. Mantas was my cousin I grew up with we have a lot of connections in the social circle not only in real life but on social media as well and probably more in the latter.
Back to the topic. What do you do with a friends or relatives profile when they passed away?My friend who raised the dilemma was unfortunate enough to loose many friends over few years and his feed was filling up with memories of birthdays, years spent together as friends, their family or friends posting on their board or sharing memories.
I guess there is no protocol. A few people choose to block the account or befriend but majority seems to stay or at least it's what I noticed. Maybe its up to the family. Friends can choose to forget, but family usually keeps it open. The official procedure: next of kin can contact fb and either change the status and make a digital mural through the page or choose to delete it. This includes the family or next of kin to provide the required documentation to gain the access to the page. Or you can just leave it.
In my opinion it all depends on the state of mind and the memories the sudden reminder on fb brings to you personally and if you can or want to deal with these memories in such a way. I see death as inevitable and I had a great amount of amazing experiences with both of my lost friends. I choose to be reminded even though I never forgot. Keeping someone who passed away as a friend is like visiting a digital graveyard - somewhere you can revisit your loved ones and friends same as they do in real life, while for others it can be as blowing the ash into the ocean and saying goodbye when closing account. There is no right or wrong way its individual choice. Befriending on fb in our society is the last time you can say goodbye and i don't mean posting anything on their wall, although this might be what some people consider and definitely do, but letting go in one way or another. There is no right or wrong way its individual choice.
It is funny how fb became a graveyard as well as a meeting place. It is becoming the norm and a big moral dilemma, yet no one seems to question it.What is going to happen in lets say 20-50 years, when 40% people who has accounts on social media are no longer alive?
In this highly digitized world with no borders where I can live in Australia and still be connected to my family in Lithuania I can see this as a fundamental shift as to how we treat and remember our friends and family who are no longer here. It is open for discussion if it is for better or worse and how it will affect our culture in general.
Open for comments from the whole steemit community really would like to hear your thoughts!
Peace!