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I am losing my mind.
The Global Game Jam is but 3 days away and I am far from ready.
It certainly hasn't helped that a graphics card issue forced me to reset the new laptop to ids factory settings and installation. That lost me hours and hours of frustration - but it seems that I'm finally on top of it - even if it has also meant that I had to start all over with the installations.
To make matters worse, my ex with whom I still presently live has a very aggressive cold... and I only have one place to turn (phew!).
My stomach is not feeling 100% and I have noticed a lapse in energy as I type - so I 'really' hope that I don't have the beginnings of gastric flu gunning up to bring me down. ¬_¬
The Global Game Jam is one of the most important events on my calendar (in part because its one of just two events that occur locally (I'd love to participate in more - I'll be working on helping make this happen in the coming months).
Well... in my rush to install, I've grown a little fuzzy about the game development tools that I've found helpful these past years... and so I cross-checked my installed tools with top lists.
And I came across Godot.
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What immediately drew my attention was the prospect of making use of a development environment that looks like Unity and Stencyl made out and had a baby.
The prospect of optional coding, to a person like myself who has not ever been able to induce himself into fully internalizing the ins and outs of a programming language makes for an attractive proposition - and the prospect of perusing such a platform which also provides good prospects for perusing of those more advanced customizations at whim simply sealed the deal for me.
It was a surprisingly quick download and the initial user interface appeared more basic than I'd expected - but it is becoming more apparent to me that leaving the foundation as solid and basic as possible provides the best foundation for customization - which is where his engine comes into its own.
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OK! So I'll be learning how to use Godot for Global Game Jam 2018!
Yes, a part of me is groaning and reveling in the midst of a face-palm (It is increasingly difficult to sell myself against specializing - and I may finally do so this time) - but this move makes sense to me.
I had a good feeling about Stencyl. I got sort of familiar with that environment during the last Global Game Jam - and actually created some kind of a game! I remain grateful. I really wanted to learn more - but it didn't quite work out that way - and it might have had something to do with big shifts in the relationships department in the period that followed.
Now its time to get familiar with an engine that will provide more healthy long-term prospects. Its open-source and appears to have a very solid and dedicated set of developers. In recent days they've indulged in a sprint documenting their latest release - Godot 3.0.
That is 'very' good.
I am intrigued... and I shall be binging upon YouTube videos and trying to set myself up within their support forums. The following promotion video looks very promising too.
I remain antsy about the likelihood of going solo (which I attribute to the aura of fail that I appear to reek)... but so be it if it must be so. Their loss.
I admit that the pain of the failure that I was saddled with a few months ago still smarts so that is also a factor.
How bad did they let me down?
Imagine spending a month working on 2D sprite sheets. Imagine spending weeks on a couple of really nice level plans and several custom tilesets.
Now imagine having one team-mate (lets call him Mister "In it to win it") who spends months claiming that his artwork is not good enough - and that he is destroying any and all evidence that he actually did squat. Now imagine that guy being given the task of simply implementing the level design (long story short - my old machine at the time couldn't handle 64 bit Unity and they both ignored my repeated and very early advice to opt for the exclusively 64-bit Unity2017 - and the other guy was too busy programming)... only to completely botch the simple task of following the plan to produce the equivalent of what you'd expect if a disgruntled art student decided to attempt a recreation of an intricate finger painting using his face at high velocity as the paint brush...
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'sigh' It looked horrendous... and only half 'his' onelevel was attributed the tilesets.
Now... the second guy is our programmer. I am not a competent coder - and I am not competent enough to know if he really worked on the project much... and I won't even get into the corners that were cut at his request because they were causing issues (who needs good game mechanics anyway?! Designed by me but tossed aside - naturally...) but at the end of it all...
...he failed to even replace his crude rectangular placeholders with the sprites that I had made... even though they were made to the standard specifications that he had requested.
So.. yeah... Imagine walking into that display event expecting a bad game with half-decent graphics only to realize to your horror that your team mates didn't afford you that...
...and having to look industry leaders, judges and other persons in the local gamedev scene whom I respect and wanted to make a good impression in the eyes while fighting the urge to simply walk out and assume a fetal position and think dark thoughts about how hard done I'd been - and wondering if I'll ever be able to hold my head high again even though I know that 'I' did a pretty good job - if not better.
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But now is not the time to dwell upon the bitter flavours of the past. I have a game jam to ace - and I plan on crushing it as an act of vindication.
I may even consider using assets that were meant for the other project that never made it into the team-mate-forsaken aforementioned game (I may as well and I probably shall!).
In spite of the deep sense of urgency that pervades my thoughts - I am actually really looking forward to the Game Jam - other than the human desire to get teamed up without having to prostate myself to others like a dog hoping for a belly rub. I would indeed rather go solo.
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But to re-attempt to lighten the mood before the end of this post - I am feeling much better equipped for this jam than the last one.
In spite of a few false starts, this new Dell Inspiron 5565 is settling down quite well.
It is 64-bit, features a decent 8GB of RAM, good connectivity and a 3-cell battery.
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A New Mouse
I invested in a nice budget gaming mouse with with variable sensitivity and a degree of LED lighting.
The 'Sumvision Nemesis Kata' is performing well so far and the only disappointment it has offered is my mistakenly thinking that 'all' its lighting is variable - but the fixed side lighting has quickly grown on me. _
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A New Set of Headphones
"Superlux Professional Studio DJ Headphones - HD669"
That is quite a name right there. Pro headphones with a degree of noise cancellation is really important for a person like myself. I am way too easily distracted by my environment (TVs are my bane). They look pretty comfortable.
Still waiting for this to arrive but my fingers are crossed...
...and that worked out as they have just arrived (phew)!
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A Pair of Programmable PC Game Controllers
This pair of "Smartfox Gamepad Controllers" marks a turning point for me - as I've not had controllers like these since my gamer days playing on the original PlayStation! I am quite excited and eager to figure out how to incorporate them into a game this weekend. It'll take things to a whole new level. _
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Yes, I am setting the bar high and I've yet to walk but I do sufficiently believe in my ability to make magic happen. Maybe some day I'll be sufficiently recognized as not to feel like an outcast in the field. :c)
I have a good feeling and hopefully I'll have a story of triumph to tell following the game jam. :c)
That reminds me. I will 'lower my steeming standards' for the coming days. I need to step up my post count - and I'll be going down the 'short yet sweet' path - especially during the days of the game jam. Likewise, my interaction with commentators may be affected but please do comment anyway as I do love to hear what you people have to say. :c)
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One more thing! If you care about the future of Steemit then you could do worse than to give my previous post (also linked below) a quick look through - and maybe a resteem! :c)
Do you have any feedback or comments on this post? The comments section below is open also! :cP
Also, if you found this post interesting and would like to share this with your followers and friends then a resteem is always appreciated.
Sincerely,
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