Hey everyone! š
How are you doing today?
I am taking it slow this weekend because there has been so much going on the last weeks. My body needs a break. :D
But for someone like me beeing a workaholic, it makes me quite restless to sit here and just watch a series or play a computer game.
I can never do this for longer than 1 or 2 hours, then I always go back to working or cleaning up something in the appartment. š
But I know, that itĀ“s really important to give my body the breaks it needs, if I want to be able continue with all the stuff going on and if I want to achieve a good work-life-balance.
I am really thinking about alot these days, and canĀ“t distract my head from all these thoughts. ItĀ“s not easy to share something personal like this. I used to make the experience often in my life, that when I was me or talked about what really concerns me on the inside, people where either laughing at me or turning away from me. But a few weeks ago, I was really personal on one of my songs I uploaded on 3Speak. And I was so overwhelmed how much feedback and comments I got for this. So I guess, itĀ“s ok to be open about your feelings here on Hive, which is such a great feeling! š
And exactly this post did lead to so many things, which happened the last weeks. Someone saw my video and post and because of this:
I have beeing offered probably the biggest chance IĀ“ve ever been offered in my life so far. Yesterday I agreed to make a trial phase as beeing a Product Owner (WOW can you believe this!) in a big gaming company! š®
This is so awesome, as I love gaming and IĀ“ve been playing games all my life. I am so excited, I wish I could start with this right away! But at the same time, I am nervous and scared.
I never had such a big role in a project, so much responsibility, and at the same time having no experience of beeing a Product Owner. I know I am pretty good at organizing complex things. And I have many skills, that could help me be a good Product Owner.
But I am also ill. I have a chronic disease and I feel pyhsically bad quite often. I suffer from a chronic fatique syndrom and there are days where I just feel sick, have a headache, feel as if I have fever and everything hurts. So this is not the best conditions to do such a job maybe. At the same time, I could work from home and structure my working time myself, which is great for such a disease.
And this project could give me financial freedom for the first time and could therefore really change my life, and everything could be much easier afterwards.
So IĀ“m really torn between excitement and fear at the moment. ItĀ“s sometimes even making me depressed and I just think: Ah, I will just leave everything as it is right now, this is what I know and I know I can handle it. But I will never be able to grow if I just stay where I am. I know that. And fear should not stop me taking this huge chance which someone is offering me right now!
But this is what I know so well for my whole life now. Fear. And it so often kept me away from things I really wanted to do. I did not take alot of chances because I have not been able to handle my fear. And this time I donĀ“t want this to stop me, or I will probably regret it my whole life. I donĀ“t even know why I write all this here right now. š But most of the times, it just helps to spit it all out, and you just feel better then. So, thank you Hive friends for giving me the opportunity to spit it all out here! š It also helps alot that I can talk about this with many people in Discord communities. Especially in the PIZZA and BEATZCHAIN Discords. So many nice people giving me advices and helping me this way! Thank you so much! š I really appreciate this!
My goal was to make Hive posts for 2-3 times a week. But right now, I feel that this is not possible for me. I first have to sort this all out and get used to all these new things that pop up in my life so quickly. So I hope you guys understand when itĀ“s quiet here for some days.
Well, even if this post is full of fear, I am still so happy that so many good things are beeing offered to me at the moment, and it shows me once more how great this whole community is, and that people are really interested in me and my music, even when I am just myself. And this such a great feeling! Thank you so much for your support guys! šā¤ļø
LetĀ“s see where this next weeks will bring me and I have faith that everything will work out the way it should.
And now, I will just go and cuddle my little dog, because this always helps so much! I donĀ“t know what I would do without her. š
Have a great start to the week guys and see you soon! š
Best regards,
RAVEN š¦