In the previous article, I said that the first gay bar I ever visited was in Helsinki.🐻 And that was because I spend my early years in Kazakhstan and Russia. There was simply no gay bar in the city where I lived in Kazakhstan. And Russia is known for "special" treatment of gay people.
For people who were raised in understanding and loving families, tolerant and open communities it might be unusual to hear and know that gay people stay underground in many countries of the world. And here is an explanation why...
People in the screenshot above are scared. This video was taken on 7th of April 2010 in the gay club "Palau", Yekaterinburg. There was no party in traditional understanding, "Palau" just provided a space for Anti-homophobia Week events like discussions, film screenings, and lectures. Discussion on 7th of April was interrupted by 10 to 15 men in balaclavas who entered the space screaming "death to faggots". Then they threw tear gas bombs and luckily run away. No one was beaten. Because of the panic and only one exit from the basement (the club was located in a basement) we all were poisoned by gas. Police didn't come and never investigated this case.
Even though it was a very unlucky event, I felt VERY LUCKY that day. I was not beaten, I came back home in one piece, the only unpleasant reminding was red eyes and sore throat.
Soon after Russian Duma implemented famous "gay propaganda law". And everything became even more complicated. Lots of friends left the country. And I can't say that they are happy in immigration. Most of us want to go back home and simply can't. Those ones who stayed, live underground hiding.
Russian gay scene changed a lot during this years. And now in order to enter a club, you really need to know its location which is given from friend to friend inside the community.
No logo, no party invitation. Locations are really hidden, always with thick metal doors and intercom.
At the entrance, you will be checked by security guys.
Such a clubs always small and you see the same people as a community is very closed.
For me such an isolation and underground survival inevitably connected with extinction or degradation. From the other side, I absolutely understand why it is what it is. And this question is something that bothers me for a long time, if I did right moving to another country, simply giving up. Did we all do better behaving this way? What is better staying underground and hiding or exposing yourself to a danger and fighting for your rights? I don't have an answer.
P.S. I intentionally chose very blurry pictures, so the faces of people would not be recognizable.