How to Attract and RETAIN Younger Men in the Gay Leathermen's Community
I'm hearing more and more rumbles of alarm among older gay leathermen in other cities...
"We're the core group of guys doing everything, and we're looking REALLY OLD right now. We don't have any club-members under the age of fifty or so, and when young guys show up, they look around, and the moment that the ten-minute bio-break arrives, they are GONE, and never return."
Down here in San Diego, we don't have that problem any more. Not whatsoever, finito. So, I'd like to explain why and how, for the benefit of my older brothers everywhere. It's not going to be fun for you, because it means that you will very definitely have to change your THINKING.
Let's start with some assumptions about younger gay leather/fetishmen:
- They don't care about traditions, or the past.
- They're just "kids" - unable (or unwilling) to be serious.
- Some day, they might be qualified to run things, once they get a few more decades under their belt.
- They will never be able to understand what our generation has gone through.
- They dress weird. Why can't they just get gear like mine, as is correct, proper and obvious to anyone?
- If they would just learn the only valid and RIGHT way to do things, I could take them more seriously.
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BAD NEWS
The bad news is, Old Guard as we knew it is D-E-A-D. It has been gone for a long, long time. We have been worshipping leftover vapors and spiderwebs from the old days. I say good riddance. I entered the deepest, darkest and hardest of the hardcore leather scene in 1977. Yes, I miss it, but not as my biggest fetish any more. I have moved on, and I urge you to do the same. Life gets a lot better, I promise.
GOOD NEWS
The GOOD news is, the new, NEW age has a vibrant, joyful, glorious and life-affirming role for us old codger graybeards. It is time for us to let go of the fucking football, and let someone with new perspectives, new energy, and new passions grab it and run, while we cheer from the sidelines. We can offer wisdom if it is asked for, but trust me - these guys can handle anything that comes at them, as long as they know that they can quietly call up the Wise, Trusted Uncles and get some private coaching.
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In summation:
As soon as I let go of my own bigotry (and yes, it is bigotry, when we pre-judge people from a distance without knowing them at all), then everything changed in our local community. I had the same prejudices as many other men of our generation. I had to consciously let go of all of them.
This allowed the younger guys to let go of THEIR prejudices about older men:
- They're all "Hands and Glands".
- They are just "trolls", and if they aren't sexually attractive to younger men, then they are of no use whatsoever.
- They whine about how bad the old days were, and nothing else.
This a snippet only, the full article as at: https://fetishmensandiego.blogspot.com/2013/03/how-to-attract-and-retain-younger-men.html?zx=e2ddf42f5654a29d