She send me a lot of pictures in time wen we spoke evry day over the net , on the phone , true skype .
Even wen i told her about my mental condition the depresions the manic episodes the sleepless nights for over days,weeks,months until a psychosis happends , the auto mutillation , trying to recover of a two year deadly relation with a severe borderline women , she din'd wanna let me go .
But i get emotionaly envolved anyway . Something i didn't want , was happening.
I tried to make her understand our situation is not so good to start a relation. Zina didn"t care , she made up her mind to come over in belgium .
It was one of the hardest thing in my life that i hade to do , saying no to her . I'm not ready fot this .
Her reaction to me, for saying no , knowing about my auto mutilation , she send me this picture .
So i send her mine . And broke al contact .
6 monhts later she wrote me a letter to say how sorry she was . And send me a friend request on facebook .
Now she found love in shotland . Maried and have one more kid . We still talk to eatch other , wen her men dont know about it .
And i em okey whit it .
Sometime saying no is the best for both . Even wen its hurts like hell .
