Hi, I'm Todd Kyle.
And I have a problem with my body odour!
Ever since I've received a respectful letter advising me that I'd need to improve on my hygiene, I try to not get to close to people anymore. I've just been hiding away in my corner for a while now.
But you have to understand, it's not actually a problem with my hygiene. Those irritating gases, they emanate from deep within my bowels and if I do not let them vent freely, bad things are going to happen.
And when I say "bad", then I mean severely bad, in a dangerous way! Well, I actually can't be sure, nothing ever did happen before, but I imagine it would be horrific
I'll just stay here venting my gas. Please, don't send me any more letters, it's not nice!
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