Everybody wants to be happy, right? Or improve things in their life? The BIGGEST secret to life, happiness and success. Here it is. Right here: Nothing inherently has any meaning. YOU give meaning to EVERYTHING. If you're struggling with any situation, it's because of the MEANING you've given it. Simply redefine the situation or give it new 'rules' to make it serve you better.
For example, as a male I sometimes find it difficult to follow the train of thought of a female. They can seem more abstract and jump from here to there without much sense. I was following a meditation led to a female with especially feminine energy and I would typically get lost and frustrated with this particular person's approach so I'd try to skip it. In this case, I caught myself following my own self-generated 'rule' that this female doesn't “speak logically” enough and that I can't follow her meditation. I changed my definition to, “I CAN follow and benefit from this person's train of thought.” The moment I did that everything changed. I was able to follow unlike before. And what it led to was a PROFOUND inner experience. This eventually even led to tears of joy and love streaming down both of my cheeks. If I had continued to perceive this person as too difficult to follow, I would have missed out on a POWERFUL experience. But instead I changed the meaning of the situation and this led to an entirely different reality.
In this sense, you actually define EVERYTHING in your life and thus, create your own reality, all out of your own perceptions. Everywhere you look, there you are. We are constantly projecting everything from inside of us out onto others and circumstances. This is why there is no objective reality. There's only YOUR version of reality. 10 different people will not see one particular person the same way. They will see THEIR version of that person, all based on their own history with that person, their own judgements, observations, insecurities, speculations, belief systems, etc.
Seeing that we project ourselves everywhere we look, we can choose to redefine all of our disempowering perceptions into empowering ones. You can rewrite all your rules about how things are to help serve you, instead of frustrate you or bring you down.
As it is, as we go through our entire day, moment by moment constantly reacting to people and things around us. We either feel happy by what's happening or feel down. Up and down. Passively fluctuating emotionally as if we have no say in the matter. A victim to life's circumstances. And more often than not, our habits tend to steer towards disempowering perceptions. Things annoy us, get in our way, take too long, aren't done our way, the “right” way and on and on.
But we DO have the option to take every single one of those instances and choose to see them differently. Redefine what they mean to you. Instead of seeing the person in front of you in line at the store who is taking forever as being annoying, you can easily redefine the situation and see that as an opportunity to either practice your conscious breathing, or use that extra time to radiate love to everyone around you, or appreciate the cashier for how they do their job, or be grateful for this incredible store with all that it offers.. Totally different result as a result of just changing the meaning of the delay.
So remember that nothing inherently has any meaning. You define what everything means to you. And like a wizard you can look around you and change the meaning of EVERYTHING to make your life a constant enjoyable, love and joy filled experience, and growth filled journey.
It's not easy to do in those tough situations that seem to “cause” you anger, but after a few small victories, it starts to get rewarding and really fun. When you see just how life can be improved by such a seemingly small shift in perception, it builds a momentum. Bon voyage! :)