Professional success, happiness with a mate, light weight when dealing with day to day things are desired by all, right? Not always! The realization of a dream, whether professional, personal or emotional, frightening and causes fear more people than we can imagine. Generates changes in life that, for many, it's scary and even paralyzing.
Have you noticed if there is any area in your life where their behaviors are repeated and soon after comes the feeling that you could have done something different to get a better result? We can cite many examples: People who when they start to like someone fantasize reasons to fight and wear relationship; or when you are about to get the job you want, is late for the interview; or he starts to lose weight around to eat a lot and put on weight again. Is it always bad luck or coincidence? Probably not! It is self sabotage or self boycott and are quite common situations and often difficult to control.
The boycott occurs when harmed us in any area of life, to hinder or prevent an improvement in our lives. It is an unconscious process, which means that we do not realize what we do, just repeat the behavior automatically without having any control over our attitudes.
Why does it happen?
Our stories and the environment we live in, from very small, are largely responsible for the formation of our personality and also of our traumas and fears. We carry these brands throughout life without even realizing or we stop to reflect.
Some psychological aspects can be observed that sabotages. Usually has a distorted way of seeing, it is considered decreased compared to the others, as if it was not worthy of a better life. There may be an important low self-esteem which consequently generates a deep insecurity.
The fear of failure and not give account of their own expectations usually also be a major pitfall in the realization of a dream. This fear becomes so large that the person prefers not to risk it and not try to achieve some goal. How are unconscious and automatic processes, when one realizes the opportunity has passed and the dream did not materialize.
How to get out of this cycle?
A first step, very important is to stop and watch. Consider whether there is any question that repeatedly does not work in your life and if you have some responsibility in this.
An interesting strategy is to talk with a good friend, he can be the person who will signal you when the automatic behaviors are repeated and thus warn you against the self boycott. Accept help! Sometimes it's just that you need to be able to overcome your own obstacles. It is very important that gradually, it becomes conscious and you can tell if the story that is being drawn from his life is really desired.
In certain situations to be aware of something and modify it can be very difficult to generate a paralysis or a very strong anxiety. In this case it is advisable to look for a psychologist to start the psycho therapeutic process of self-knowledge, so that together you can get rid of your own prison.
Do not allow fear or uncertainty paralyze you in search of new challenges and in achieving your dreams. Living is taking risks, is launching the opportunities, because only then is it possible to break free and be happy!