Envy is what I feel when I see my school batchmates show their successes in life. Some got married have the family of their own, some have the family of their own and went to live abroad or at least had a trip someplace, and some got rich by selling real estate property.
But less than .001 percent like me never had any chance of achieving those normal achievements. So when I get to think of it sometimes I just make a deep sigh and question why in 6 billion people on earth that this kind of difficult, rare, and expensive to manage health problem ever happened to me.
A normal person would feel suicidal if not to get depressed. But I have passed both of that, being suicidal is out of the question but I had been depressed even before I went for my first dialysis because then I already knew what will become of me but not this that I developed bone problems and disfigurement.
So I am persevering to have a normal life, near-normal at least because there is also a very big chance that I can ever achieve most of my medical plans even though I could get funded. But who knows maybe if I would search harder I would find a doctor that could help to fix my mouth so I can be able to eat normally and speak without much difficulty.
But still I will never lose hope because hope is what drives me move forward because life is about the continuity of life and that is what I am doing. To achieve it is to do my part in this jungle of a life that I live in where I really have to outwit even my own mental capacities in order for me to be able to handle this tumultuous life and I really have to survive. But I can do it, with the help of God via steemit community I am empowered.