My knees feels like that thing you feel when you want to let go while hanging on a cliff with your bare hands and I am like a jello all over. I do not wish that my parents would be the ones that will bathe me, I do not want to go that situation and wish to die before it happens.
I am totally invalid if not for my desire to go and still fight and seek for another day of my life. My mind for me is still healthy although I have some mental and physical deficiencies in it but my body just isn't budging with all the nudge I am trying to do and with stiffness plus pain compounding it, I thought "This is really unbelievable."
I just hope that soon I could be able to renovate my home particularly my bathroom so that it can get friendlier for my body's invalidity. I often get the worry when it rains hard that it makes the bathroom unusable so it is a real problem because I have to go to my sister's house to use their bathroom and I am not used to that because of my body.
Now I am in pain with my hip joint, I cannot walk anymore so using a wheelchair is very important. You could suggest some exercise but easier said than done because of the weakness issue too. I just wanted to cry but it seems that even my eyes are tired of weeping anymore.