How to de-stress
Stress is a very common thing these days and you see and hear it all around. People stress about everything and can’t make themselves to calm down and de-stress. But before we dive into how to de-stress we have to understand what stress is.
The evolution of stress
Saber-toothed tigers lived on the earth up to 12 thousand years ago and they put the fear into our eyes just thinking about them. Our ancestors lived along side these animals and yet we are still here and they are not. We managed to survive because of our warning system in our brains. We were conscious of the threats that were around and ambient noise can be shown to fluctuate. Sometimes the wind may roar louder than the tiger; at other times, the tiger may cause the rustle as it seeks to rustle up a few humans for dinner; and there are times when the noise is merely in our minds. In simple terms we respond to threats that are not actual threats, but in an evolutionary perspective it will likely pay of. The stress response will sharpen all your senses and makes you ready for danger to fight or get to safety
Stress can arrive from two things, fear and anxiety. Let me give you an example. You pass the street corner that you pass every day and one day a car drives with an insane speed through the red light and just misses you by inches. In that moment you have fear, your stressed and your heartbeat is raised and all you're senses are sharpened. The next day you walk there again but just by seeing the street corner that you passed yesterday you induce a stress response and your ready for danger. This is stress induced by anxiety, it is imaginary danger that activates your stress response.
Stress In today's age
The problem in stress today lies in our imagination. In today's world we see saber-toothed tigers everywhere; in subways, schools and sporting events but instead of this fear subsiding when the tiger is gone, we continue to feel anxious, and the longer we feel stressed the more it effects our health. Dealing with stress has become a big part of our lives with many battles real and imagined. The stresses we deal with today may not reflect our real world but the diseases caused by it are real. Life has its ups and downs, and happiness does not have to be mandatory. We have to remember that stress is a real evolutionary response, it is the response on stress that is unreal. We simply have to cope better, we need to learn how to go along with life, listening to all the stressors you cant hear and not bothering.
Coping with those stressors is where my de-stress methods come in. Since stress is all in your head I think working on your mental health is the most important for getting rid of unhealthy stress. Mindfulness is a great way to learn how to deal with stress and use healthy stress to your advantage.
My de-stress methods
I have a method for:
- Every day chaos & stress
- Highly stressed (bucket is almost full)
- Yearly reboot/extreme de-stress
Every day chaos & stress
Life throws its daily stressors at us, unexpected changed and high workload makes you feel stressed and over time that could build up. I have a de-stress routine build up in my every day life so that I can handle those stressors that life throws at me. There are a couple things crucial here:
Sleep
Getting your daily 8-9 hour sleep is crucial for your body. If your sleep deprived your not able to handle your emotion and feelings as well. You tend to grasp to bad habits like bad Diet what in turn has its affect on your body and mental health. So getting your daily sleep must be the first thing you do start the day fresh and be ready for what life will bring you that day.
Diet
Diet habits have an import role on the mental health. Eating a high calorie, high carbohydrates diet with lots of processed and refined foods with lots of sugar has a big impact on your whole body. This is because most of the refined sugars and carbohydrates spike your blood sugar and give you a lot of spikes in energy level what as a result gives you a lot of downs as well. This constant fluctuation in energy level makes you tired, demotivated and more susceptible for stress. The food that gives you the most spikes in blood sugar are the ones with the highest GL(glycemic load). I try to avoid those foods, I eat a Paleo ish diet with lots of vegetables(3/5 of my diet), and the rest Greek yoghurt, nuts, seeds, fruits, meat and fish. I do intermitted fasting with that. For the people that don’t know what that is, it is basically eating your food in a smaller time window. I eat in a window of 4-6 hours a day. Because you only eat 4-6 hours a day your blood sugar will be stable the rest of the day what means that your energy level will be constant, your less tired all day and will be more susceptible for life.
Physical activity
Physical activity will help with improved self esteem as a key benefit of psychological health. Physical also has a direct impact on the body which can reduce stress. When you work out your body releases chemicals called endorphins. Endorphins interact with the pain receptors and reduce the perception of it. Endorphins also trigger positive feelings in the body. That's why when you go running you can get in that euphoric state what is called the runners high. Your endorphins are running through your nervous system and make you have this positive energetic look on life. The most important thing is that you find a physical activity that you love to do. For me that is gymnastics and other alethic sports, I am surrounded by great friends there which whom I share the same passion.
Mindfulness
In my opinion the most important one. Sleep, physical activity and diet are ways to set your mind up to work properly. But learning how to handle emotions and feelings and be in a happy state of mind so that you will be able to experience life to the fullest is something you can achieve with mindfulness. I use a couple things to be mindful and live in the now.
Meditation
I meditate in the morning and sometimes in the evening as well. Sitting still and focusing just on your breathing is harder than it seems. Thoughts and feelings pop up all the time. The trick is to notice the thoughts and go back to focusing on your breathing. Just take 10 minutes for yourself without thinking about everything, because these days your busy in your head all the time. Often times the first thing people do when they wake up is check there phone to be flooded with information. Try to meditate first when you wake up, even if it is just 2 minutes. You will notice the difference in the long run.
Journaling
I write a couple thing in my journal every day to be more mindful of what I did, liked and disliked. I write down:
- 1 things I am grateful for today
- 1 thing I really liked today
- 1 thing I disliked or made me feel bad or down
- 1 thing I should do differently
Just by writing these things down every day will give you a better vision of what you're doing every day and what makes you feel good and bad. You will have a clearer view over where to find your happiness and meaning in life.
Jar of awesome
I try to write down things that made me happy, that I achieved, that simply makes me feel really good on a small paper and put them in a jar. So whenever I feel down or stressed I take a paper out and read the positive uplifting things I achieved or did, it will make you feel better and turn your bad times around.
Focus on your breathing 10 times
Whenever I’m around nature and think about it I try to do 10 deep breaths focus on it and experience the beauty around me. Were always so chaotic on our heads these days, we think about the past and the future but we never take a moment to experience the now. That’s why I try to take as many short (maybe 10-20 seconds at a time) moments to just be in the now. It is helping me a lot with not worrying about the future all the time.
Building these elements in your daily routine will make you a lot more susceptible to the daily stresses that come your way. I always try to put my workouts before I go to work, it gives you a great kick start of the day. My day would look like this.
- Wake up take a cold shower
- Meditate 10 minutes
- Stretch/workout
- Work
- Sports/workout when I couldn’t do it in the morning
- Friends/family
- Reading
- Meditation
- Sleep
Highly stressed
There will be times that I didn’t do my daily routines consistently or where life was just a lot more stressful. Whenever I notice that I get more anxious for the future and not really live in the moment, I try to do a de-stress day. I would plan a day where I had no obligations at all, no work, no paperwork, no mail, no nothing. I will shut down my phone and all other devices. I will make it a day only existing of me time.
I would start the day after waking up naturally(without an alarm) around 07:30. I would drink coffee and after that meditate for 20 minutes. By the time I’m done meditating my coffee kicked in and I will go for a run to get my endorphins running and get those runners high. After that, I will take a bath and play some good music. By the time I’m done with that (10-11 ish) I will make some delicious healthy food and watch an episode of my favorite Netflix serie while eating. In the afternoon I will mostly plan on playing guitar or play some games for relaxation.
Then when I’m completely relaxed and clear minded I will go to the forest smoke some marijuana (just a small amount)and take a walk. This is of course not crucial, It just a personal preference. I do this because this brings me in this altered state where I can appreciate the nature so much more. I feel more connected to myself, the earth and everything around me. I use this altered state to reflect on my life and see it in perspective again. That wasn’t the case because I was stressed. After the walk, I will go back home and write down what made me stressed and what I can do to change that. What my key values and goals are in life and how to achieve them. Writing this all down gives me this feeling of rest. Knowing that I don’t have to worry about the future since If I know what my goals and values are in life and how to achieve them. After that whole day I’m most of the times full of energy, excited for the future, I feel alive again and feel good about myself.
Yearly reboot/extreme de-stress
Stress and negative thoughts build up slowly over time, to prevent myself from getting off track, I do a yearly de-stress course called vipassana. Vipassana is a 10 day silent retreat where you meditate 8-11 hours a day and that is all you do. You can’t talk, write, read or communicate with anyone whatsoever. Only 10 minutes a day with the meditation teacher of you have any questions or problems. This is the ultimate de-stresss course, it is hard don’t get me wrong but at the end, you're more calm and clear than ever before.
The idea of vipassana is sitting still and first focus on your breath without thinking about anything else. You do this the first three days, only focusing on your upper lip. You have to feel the air coming out of your nose. After those three days, you’re going to scan your body from your head to your feet and back. You have to feel every sensation; cold, heat, itches, pain, numbness, everything. The idea is that you observe all your sensations objectively without any thoughts or emotions attached to it. So pain without a feeling of wanting to get rid of it and the same goes for a comfortable feeling, don’t crave it.
The moment you feel everything objectively without attaching anything to it your mind will get rebooted. You will be able to see life objectively and don’t react to all the imaginary saber toothed tigers that life brings us these days. After those 10 days, you have compassion and love for everything and everyone around you, negativity is as good as gone and I can not get angry anymore. This, of course, doesn’t last if you don’t practice vipassana every day. I meditated only 10 -20 minutes a day after the course instead of 8-11 hours a day. The intensity of meditation will degrease enormously but since I don’t have that much time I just do 10-20 minutes every day. I notice that slowly after months your reacting to triggers of frustration and anxiety again. You attach feelings, thoughts, and emotions to things that happen slowly over time what makes your decision making cloudy, that’s why I try to do a yearly vipassana to reboot my brain and have a fresh start again.
I know that many of you probably think 10 days of just sitting and not communicating at all is not something that I can do. Well, that was what I thought, I meditated maybe 10 times but I couldn’t focus and let go of my thoughts. I’m a hyperactive person with ADHD, I’m always active doing sports or talking with people, simply always communicating. I was really chaotic in my head and never had that moment of rest, at first I accepted that. I thought that was just me, but that doesn’t have to be you. It is hard, and it will be tough but the result that you will get out of it is enormous, for many people life-changing. And vipassana retreats are all over the world and it is free as well. They work on donations and volunteers.
This was a little insight in the de-stress methods I use to keep a calm, clear and happy state of mind without the stress taking over my life, like it does to so many people.
I hope it was useful for you, every small bit that might help the world get a little happier is the only thing I want. If you have any tips, suggestion please comment below. English is not my native language so it might not be perfect but I’m working on that. I’m always open for suggestions. I’m planning to write more blogs about Health, nutrition, exercise and mindfulness over time, so if your interested feel free to check out my account.
For now thanks for reading and,
Healthy 100