“I’m fat...”

This is something I would always find myself saying. To my friends, to my boyfriend, to my family. Although this is something I would say often, I could never really get a handle on my weight. I had been through this cycle before: I was an avid powerlifter, but my eating habits never matched my work ethic in the gym. I would become insecure, clean up my eating for about 3 weeks, and then resort right back to my daily trips to Taco Bell.

In the fall of 2017, I received an internship opportunity in the state capital that required me to temporarily relocate. I relocated without my support system for six months. Without a support system, and without anything to do except work, the pounds piled on faster than they ever had before. After my internship was over, I moved home 30 pounds heavier than when I had moved. I felt my insecurities flare up again, but I did nothing to stop it. I kept eating and eating and eating, until one fateful morning when I decided to weigh myself. I stared blankly down at the numbers on the scale: 201 lbs.

Now, normally I would have just pretended like this number didn’t exist. Normally, I would pretend like that had never happened, and continued on with my terrible habits that got me there in the first place. But, on the same day I saw that number, I removed my clothes to take a shower and was shocked at what I saw in the mirror: stretch marks. Stretch marks on my abdomen, on my sides, and starting to come in on my legs.

I broke down. I cried. I whined. I cursed everything around me. How could I look this way? How could I really be here seeing this? Is this real? Is this really my body? Yes. Yes, this was really my body. Yes, I was the one who did this to myself. As I came out of my overwhelming break down, a memory sparked of two nights prior. I had been sitting on my laptop, scrolling through Facebook, and stumbled upon my best friend posting progress pictures from a program she was doing called ‘80 Day Obsession.’ In her description, she talked about how she wasn’t even finished and had already lost 20 pounds. Although I was skeptical of a program based from my house, I have known her for almost 13 years, so when she says something works, I always know to trust her. I went home that day and signed myself up for 80 Day Obsession.

In my next post, I will talk about my journey through Phase 1 of 80 Day Obsession. What it was like, how much weight I lost, my feelings on it all, etc. Until then, I have attached in this post my progress photos from day 1 of 80 Day Obsession, through the end of Phase 1.

If you are interested in starting your own fitness journey, I have attached the link below to be one of my workout buddies! Spoiler alert: we are currently doing 80 Day Obsession! :) Fill out the workout buddy form here and I will contact you to give you next steps.