Howdy folks and greetings from the Great Plains of North Texas! We're in the middle of the story about an incident that happened to a Mountain Man named Sam and here is a recap for those who missed the first two parts of the story:
The time is the early 1800's, the place is in the Rocky Mountains of Wyoming in the winter time. Sam's decision to free a pair of large Elk who were trapped by their own horns interlocking had taken his attention and alertness to his surroundings away and he had been surprised by a war party of Blackfeet who he was forced to surrender to.
The Blackfeet and Sam were mortal enemies as he had scalped and killed a number of them in previous fights. He knows they plan to ransom him to the Crow who will kill him in a horrendous fashion.
He's been bound with leather thongs attached to a rope and forced to walk through the snow on a trip back to their village. Sam doesn't know how many days travel it will take to get there but he knows he has to escape before they arrive or he may never have another opportunity.
Ok folks..well Sam is in a world of trouble. But he's smart, tough, resourceful and cunning. He's been in life and death situations before and he's determined to escape or at least not be taken alive to the Crow nation.
Day 2 was a repeat of day 1 with a cup of foul soup for breakfast and one at night. Two guards on him at night so no chance to escape. Day 3 was the same grind and Sam knows if he doesn't find a way to escape he'll either be too exhausted to try or they'll arrive at the village.
On the evening of the third day they stopped to make camp. The Chief had applied fresh war paint and his face was black and red. He rode up on Sam's mare, dismounted and walked up to him, his black eyes glittering.
After a few seconds of them staring at each other the Chief struck Sam in the face. Sam studied the Chief's features, memorizing each detail...the scars, the shape of his teeth when he snarled. His intention was to hunt him down when he got his freedom.
The Chief then yelled at one of his braves who walked up to Sam and began to speak in English. This surprised Sam because he didn't know any of them spoke English.
Things start to get out of hand
In broken English and gesturing with signs the warrior told him that they would trade him to the Crow and then began a long and detailed description of what the Crow would do to him, growing more and more animated and excited.
The other warriors were getting riled up and excited too. Sam knew that they'd been trying to convince the Chief to let them have the Rum and let them have Sam so they could have a big party and celebration.
This was the most concerned that Sam had been, he knew this moment might turn into a frenzy of lust for Rum and lust for his blood. He decided to speak.
Sam has to do something
But not in a normal human voice. Sam was a huge man over 6 ft 5 inches tall with a barrel chest and a booming voice. He gathered all the strength he could and spoke as their most feared enemy and as a great leader and chief.
His first sounds were a thunderous roar from the depth of his being that came out with a shattering explosion which stunned and astounded the warrior before him. The warrior backed away in fear and and so did the Chief.
All of his frustration and rage poured out as Sam lifted his mighty arms in the air and boomed "Almighty God up there in your kingdom, look down on your son, for he will be gone beaver before he will stand for such insults! These cowards have about used up my patience and I will stand no more of it!"
Sam blows their minds
Then he puffed his cheeks in and out, causing his golden beard to quiver and shake. He bugged and rolled his eyes to freak them out even more. Once again he thrust his arms to heaven and shouted.
"Almighty father, I wasn't born to be slapped around and spit upon. Look down and give me the strength of Samson!" Then he burst into wild exultation and acted like a crazy man hollerin and yahooin with all his might.
The entire bunch of Blackfeet, Sam had counted 58, were stunned. They were staring at him in wonderment. They had never seen such a deafening uproar.
Sam bellowed and even broke into song. He didn't know where the power came from but he vented all his rage and contempt for a full five minutes. Then, covered with sweat he leaned against the tree they had tied him to with 58 pairs of eyes entranced by this strange giant.
The warriors didn't know if they were dealing with a regular human or some kind of God. They didn't know what to think. lol. The Chief approached Sam cautiously like Sam could explode at any minute.
He pushes their buttons
Sam had them where he wanted them so he broke into a great roar and made it known with word and gestures that he would fight any 5 of them to the death in front of the entire Blackfeet nation. He knew they would never even consider that challenge but this was psychological warfare and he had the upper hand.
To them nothing was more important than courage and honor so he started insulting them. He said that they were no braver than sick squaws or dying coyotes with their heads in holes..that they were no more than rabbits..a nation of magpies with broken wings.
That they should just take him to the Crow and get it over with.. but if it was a large ransom they wanted...tobacco and rum and guns, bullets and coffee..they should ransom him to the mountain men who would pay MUCH more for him and then after they set him free they could capture him again and sell him again for even more rum and goods!
Psychological warfare
This was a brilliant tactic, to remind them of the rum and to put it in their thoughts that they could recapture him for even more rum and supplies.
Then with all the indignation of a slighted king he warned them that whatever they did, they would die like puking coyotes in their vomit if they forgot that he was a great chief and mighty one...that he was to be treated with dignity and honor. And if he was not, all the mountain men would come against them and hunt them down.
To add to their confusion Sam then broke into tremendous singing while the braves stood in amazement like they were hypnotized. He stopped as suddenly as he started and roared for the English speaker to come forward.
The English speaking brave cautiously approached and Sam told him to tell his leader that Sam was a great chief, mightier than those eaters of crickets who had been slapping his face, and that he should be treated as such.
"Go, you quivering coyote! Tell him that Chief Samson is to be put in a tent, as befits a great one!"
There was a huge amount of talking and consulting among the warriors. The English speaker came back to Sam and told him that a tent would be prepared for him and he would have a robe to lie on.
Sam's story continues on the next post, thank you all for reading!
-jonboy Texas
the gentleman redneck
PS- ya know...you might just be a redneck if:
You think 'Hamlet' is on the McDonald's breakfast menu!
