At my church Heaven Knows It,_ the youth music band had grown tired of singing praises through a single borrowed speaker that crackled like dry leaves in harmattan. So they formally wrote to the church elders, requesting funds for proper musical instruments.
The proposal read:
Requested Items:
- Two Standard Speakers – ₦170,000 each = ₦340,000
- Professional Audio Mixer – ₦280,000
- Transportation & Logistics – ₦45,000
Grand Total: ₦665,000
The band was hopeful. The vision was clear: clearer sound, deeper worship, and better coordination.
But during the council meeting, Elder Jonathan, known for his "wisdom and village connections," stood up and declared, “₦665,000? That’s robbery! I know where we can get all these for just ₦300,000.”
With confidence, he collected the money and left town the next morning.
Three days later, he returned—and so did the drama. The band gathered with excitement to see their new gear. But instead of a professional audio mixer and quality speakers, Elder Jonathan proudly unveiled two colorful Bluetooth speakers... and a cement mixer.
“Yes!” he announced. “Here is the mixer and speakers. Total cost? ₦295,000. I even saved ₦5,000!”
The room fell into stunned silence... followed by scattered laughter... and finally, holy weeping.
Someone whispered, “Elder... they meant a sound mixer, not cement mixer.”
Another added, “Sir, these speakers are for house parties, not the Holy Ghost.”
