Teresa had grown up believing that she had to be good all the time, that it was frowned upon to say what she felt and thought, that her opinion was worth little, that others had to take care of her in order for her to be happy.
He fervently believed in love stories where it was the other person who was responsible for providing everything including happiness, affection and affection should come from another person, this would be unconditional and he was going to provide it just like that.
Therefore, Teresa believed that by assuming a submissive attitude where others talked and she kept quiet or if she said "yes" to everything, to please she would be liked, appreciated and loved, in the innermost part of her being she felt that this is good because she was good, although in reality she suffered for the circumstances she lived but she preferred not to manifest her feelings and emotions.
The role that Teresa had decided to play brought her unhappiness, bitterness, sometimes she perceived the rejection of others, that hurt a lot but she kept quiet, she kept quiet to be accepted by the group, by the family, by the herd avoiding to be excluded from the love and protection that she believed that only other people should give her, however, there were always obstacles to achieve that feeling.
One day, Teresa felt that everyone was abusing her, her good disposition, her silence, so at that moment she decided to change, she sought help to find what she longed for but felt that no one was giving her unconditional love. On the way of her search she found experts who talked to her about self-love, what it means and how to cultivate it day by day.
She began to attend support groups that had the same beliefs and problems as her, Teresa no longer wanted to be the same, she wanted to take control of her life, she was not willing to continue playing the role that hurt her so much and did not let her be happy, and she wanted to get tools to change the course of her life, to abandon the old beliefs with which she had grown up.
At the beginning it was very hard for her because she understood that her attitude and her way of thinking was the main barrier to reach the happiness she wanted so much, however she began to take steps to build her confidence and reach her great desire to be loved.
Photo by Benjamin Wedemeyer on unsplash
During her tenacious search she realized that love was within her and not outside, that she could accept herself as she was, that there was nothing wrong with her, that feeling what she felt was valid, that each emotion that was activated had very valuable information to decipher, that she did not need to find love, she simply had to work hard on it so that it would grow and sprout from her being.
Now Teresa knows that she does not have to ask for anything, everything is within herself, she accepts herself with her pluses and minuses, she knows her defects, her weaknesses, but also her virtues, her strengths, her abilities and her gifts, she is aware of her worth as a person, she does not have to do anything or please anyone to be appreciated and valued for who she is.
The change of beliefs has allowed Teresa to respect her uniqueness, her authenticity, to appreciate herself as she is, she accepts her emotions and feelings without judging them, she prioritizes her needs before others, she listens to her body and obeys it, she satisfies her small pleasures without expecting someone else to do it, knows how to ask for help when she needs it because she understands that she can't handle everything, all the time and if she makes a mistake or makes a mistake she no longer sees it as the end of the world, she is human and can make mistakes, she knows that there are challenges and she can face them, that she is able to live with herself and feel good, in short Teresa learned what self-love means.
Translated with www.DeepL.com/Translator (free version)
Teresa había crecido creyendo que tenía que ser buena siempre, que era mal visto decir lo que sentía y pensaba, que su opinión poco valía, que los otros debían encargarse de ella para poder ser feliz.
Creía fervientemente en las historia de amor donde era el otro que se ocupa en brindar todo incluso la felicidad, el afecto y el cariño debía provenir de otra persona este sería incondicional además se lo iba a proporcionar así no más.
Por lo tanto, Teresa creyó que asumiendo una actitud sumisa donde los demás hablaban y ella callaba o si decía “si” a todo, para complacer ella sería querida, apreciada y amada, en lo más interno de su ser sentía que eso está bien porque era buena, aunque en realidad sufría por las circunstancia que vivía pero prefería no manifestar sus sentimientos y emociones.
El rol que Teresa había decido desempeñar le traía desdicha, amargura, a veces percibía el rechazo de los demás, eso dolía mucho pero ella callaba, callaba para ser aceptada por el grupo, por la familia, por la manada evitando ser excluida del amor y protección que creía que solo las demás personas le debían dar, sin embargo, siempre habían obstáculo para alcanzar ese sentimiento.
Cierto día, Teresa sintió que todos abusaban de ella, de su buena disposición, de su silencio, entonces en ese momento decidió cambiar, buscó ayuda para encontrar aquello que tanto anhelaba pero sentía que nadie se lo daba el amor incondicional. En el camino de su búsqueda fue encontrando a expertos que le hablaban del amor propio, lo que significa y como cultivarlo día a día.
Comenzó asistir a grupos de ayuda que tenían las mismas creencias y problemas que ella, Teresa ya no deseaba ser la misma, quería tomar las riendas de su vida, no estaba dispuesta a continuar desempeñando el papel que tan daño le hacía y no la dejaba ser feliz, y quería conseguir herramientas para cambiar el rumbo de su vida, abandonar las viejas creencias con las cuales había crecido.
Al principio fue muy duro para ella porque entendió que su actitud, y su manera de pensar era la barrera principal para llegar a la felicidad que tanto deseaba, no obstante empezó a dar pasos para ir edificando su confianza y alcanzar su gran deseo ser amada.
Foto de Benjamin Wedemeyer on unsplash
Durante su tenaz búsqueda se consiguió con que el amor está en ella y no afuera, que podía aceptarse como era, que no había nada de malo en ella, que sentir lo que sentía era válido, que cada emoción que se le activaba tenían información muy valiosa para descifrar, que no necesitaba encontrar amor, simplemente lo tenía que trabajar arduamente en ella para que creciera y brotara de su ser.
Ahora Teresa sabe que no tiene que pedir nada todo está dentro de sí misma, se acepta con sus más y sus menos, conoce sus defectos, sus debilidades, pero también sus virtudes, su fortalezas, sus habilidades y sus dones, está al tanto de su valía como persona, que no tiene hacer nada, ni agradar a nadie para ser apreciada y valorada por ser quien es.
El cambio de creencias le ha permitido a Teresa respetar su singularidad, su autenticidad, apreciarse tal como es, acepta sus emociones y sentimientos no los juzga, prioriza sus necesidades antes que las otras, escucha su cuerpo y le obedece, satisface sus pequeños placeres sin esperar que otro lo haga, sabe pedir ayuda cuando la necesita porque ella entiende que no lo puede con todo, todo el tiempo y si se equivoca o comente un error ya no lo ve como el fin del mundo es humana y se puede equivocar, sabe que existen retos y ella los pueden afrontar, que es capaz de vivir consigo misma y sentir bien, en definitiva Teresa aprendió lo que significa el amor propio.