Spanish馃尫
Imagen en Pixabay por darksouls1
Resentimiento馃枻...
馃枻La paz en mi se va, cuando recuerdo el ayer,
heridas del pasado se abren en mi ser,
pu帽ales hirientes del recuerdo del ayer
que trasladan mi vida a un drama oscuro.
馃枻El tiempo ha pasado, lentamente en mi ser,
veneno va recorriendo
como un Sentimiento oscuro.
馃枻Resentimiento que cabalga libremente en mi ser,
anclando mi vida a pensamientos turbios.
Saludos a todos los amables lectores de la Comunidad Emociones Y Sentimientos, deseandoles a todos un dia Maravilloso lleno de mucho Bienestar馃尫
Este es mi entrada al tema del Mes de febrero RESENTIMIENTO馃尫
El resentimiento es una emoci贸n causada por recuerdos repetitivos de actos cometidos en nuestra contra, situaciones que consideramos injustas, que activan en nuestra vida la ira, decepci贸n, tristeza por los agravios cometidos, alej谩ndonos de la felicidad
La Presencia del Resentimiento surge cuando invertimos tiempo en recordar el da帽o causado por una persona, un tiempo que trae a memoria recuerdos negativos que nos hacen m谩s da帽o a nosotros que a la persona que cometi贸 la falta
Escondernos detr谩s del Resentimiento es una forma de huir del dolor causado por las ofensas, un muralla de defensa ante una amenaza, que esconde nuestra fragilidad, un estado que nos lleva a creer que somos fuertes, sin embargo dentro de nosotros estamos derribados, incapacitados ante un dolor que no queremos expresar
Imagen en pixabay por darksouls1
Al Ser el Resentimiento un Escudo, es m谩s f谩cil para la mayor铆a de nosotros elegirlo antes que Perdonar, antes que aceptar el dolor, la tristeza por eso lo alimentamos constantemente, lo guardamos tanto tiempo, al final solo nos da帽a a nosotros mismo con su veneno
Pensar que el resentimiento nos hace mas fuerte es una idea errada, si te detienes un instante a reflexionar miras todo lo que esconde, nuestra incapacidad por resolver situaciones del pasado, heridas que nunca fueron sanadas, por la insistencia de ver justicia tu favor
Todos somos afectados en alg煤n momento por el Resentimiento,Tambi茅n he vivido los estragos del Resentimiento en mi vida, que interfirieron en mi camino a la tranquilidad hace mucho tiempo
Imagen en pixabay por darksouls1
Resentimiento Anclado a mi鉂わ笍 驴Que lo produjo?
Cuando guardas Resentimiento, siempre se rompe una relaci贸n entre tu y la persona que te afecta, una de mis relaciones rotas fue el v铆nculo con mi padre, las relaciones entre padres e hijos no son tan f谩ciles, tampoco todos los malos entendidos son solucionados, pueden pasar a帽os y los efectos del Resentimiento surgen
Las heridas Emocionales causadas por esa convivencia disfuncional con mi padre me llev贸 guardar Resentimiento por mi padre, los traumas de su infancia fueron trasladados al hogar, la culpa injustificable que el sent铆a por tener tres hijas en lugar de hijos lo llev贸 a cometer errores, que me afectaron directamente por ser su hija mayor
Mi vida no ha sido f谩cil, tampoco mi infancia, hasta ahora mi padre existe lamentablemente yo no existo para 茅l, ha sido dif铆cil aceptar eso, sin embargo ahora no siento ese Resentimiento porque entiendo que es un error, aunque me cost贸 entenderlo para sanar.
Al principio no entend铆a los traumas de mi padre, eso me llev贸 a guardar resentimiento, 茅l fue un padre exigente, ausente al mismo tiempo, solo aparec铆a para presionarme, para humillarme, para reclamarme, nunca estuvo cuando lo necesite, sin embargo, yo hac铆a todo para llenar su vac铆o, me sent铆a culpable por ser ni帽a en lugar de ni帽o, al final nada de lo que hice fue perfecto perfecto para 茅l, eso fue un da帽o directo a mi coraz贸n, era injusto para mi
Imagen en pixabay por darksouls1
Esos da帽os hicieron que mi vida se anclara a muchos recuerdos, los disgustos se acumularon, me sent铆a despreciada, abandonada, no ten铆a el valor de decirle a mi padre lo mal que me sentia, eso suele pasar cuando reprimes lo que sientes, incluyendo El Resentimiento
Buscando en mi pasado ahora comprendo que me llev贸 a sentir tanto Resentimiento: me sent铆 odiada en lugar de amada, en cada persona este se activa por las ofensa, aunque los motivos sean diferentes, esto fue parte de lo que me llev贸 a no dejarlo ir por mucho tiempo
Enojo Reprimido
El enojo reprimido, mi incapacidad de enfrentar a mi padre, me llev贸 a tomar una actitud negativa, rebelde, no pod铆a estar cerca de mi padre, su presencia llenaba mi mente de recuerdos inc贸modos, no cre铆a en la sinceridad de sus abrazos, no quer铆a estar cerca de de el, le llevaba la contraria en todo, solo para verlo molesto
A veces culpamos a una persona por las ofensas,pero si buscamos mas alla tambien cometidos errores que alimentaron esas acciones
Cuando ten铆a 16 a帽os ese Resentimiento creci贸 m谩s por mi padre, enga帽o a mi madre, por cosas la vida yo lo descubr铆 y todo empeoro entre el y yo, entonces mi madre sufr铆a al vernos dentro de una misma casa sin dirigirnos la palabra, pensar en eso me lleva a pensar que solo usaba una m谩scara delante de 茅l, me sent铆a deprimida, sola no hablaba con nadie sobre como me afectaba esa situaci贸n
Muchas veces cuando albergamos Resentimiento no queremos hablar con los dem谩s sobre lo que nos paso, en mi caso por miedo a ser juzgada, que no me comprendieran, en esa etapa ya me estaba haciendo mucho da帽o, luchaba con la Depresi贸n
Imagen en pixabay por
darksouls1
Dolor Emocional
El guardar Resentimiento te hace mas da帽o a ti, de lo que imaginas, cuando este comienza a fluir es un Veneno, te lleva una y otra vez a los recuerdos de las ofensas, entonces las heridas son abiertas nuevamente, duelen como la primera vez, destruyen tu autoestima, te llevan a sentimientos negativos.
Sientes en tu coraz贸n una amargura al pensar en esa persona, en sus ofensas, al intentar buscar una respuesta, una raz贸n para sus actos, una amargura que se alimenta no solo de recuerdos, la impotencia, la ira la atan a ti con cadenas, entonces lloras por una ofensa y terminas llorando por recuerdos de tu infancia
El Resentimiento hacia nuestros padres es destructivo, generan murallas en tu mente, te sumerge en conflictos que no se ven, batallas desde adentro de tu ser
En esa etapa ya hab铆a notado su presencia, mas no quer铆a soltarlo era un escudo para mi que escond铆a el dolor emocional que sent铆a
Imagen en pixabay de RondellMelling
Te pierdes de la Felicidad cuando guardas Resentimiento, yo perd铆 muchos a帽os de la compa帽铆a de mi padre, todo hubiese sido diferente, lamentablemente ocurri贸 de esa forma
Ese amargura en mi coraz贸n estanco muchas 谩reas de mi vida, me llene de desconfianza, recuerdo que habia dias que lloraba por la situacion con mi padre,de tanto pensar terminaba con dolor de cabeza
En medio de esos procesos Siempre dentro de m铆 hab铆a un pensamiento que deb铆a parar, lo ignore muchas veces, sab铆a que deb铆a buscar una soluci贸n
Dejar Atr谩s el Resentimiento
Mi etapa de buscar una Sanidad para mi vida, comenzo a mis 21 a帽os luego de salir de mi lucha con la depresi贸n, necesitaba Perdonar, as铆 que mi primer paso fue buscar la raz贸n de tanto Resentimiento hacia mi padre,para regular esa emoci贸n, aprender a perdonar: No solo con palabras sino con el corazon
Fue muy f谩cil para mi elegir al Resentimiento como escudo, soltarlo fue un poco dif铆cil, era necesario de nada val铆a seguir aferrada a 脡l
Comprender que el Resentimiento es una situaci贸n que no solucionada contigo misma te permite seguir el camino a entender que te haces da帽o, que eres tu la que alimentas esa Emoci贸n, que depende de ti el tiempo que se quede anclada a tu coraz贸n, desprenderte de ella te encamina al Perd贸n
Identificar esas emociones da帽inas que alimentan al Resentimiento hacia mi padre, las misma que me llevaron a presentar una actitud negativa, me indicaba que deb铆a cambiar para bien, esforzarme
Perdonar es un proceso que requiere esfuerzo, que comienza desde una sanidad interna, aquella 茅poca fue complicada pero no me rend铆, ELEG脥 PERDONAR A MI PADRE
Eleg铆 dejar atr谩s El resentimiento, un herramienta que emplee en aquellos d铆as fue escribir, drenar en p谩ginas mis Emociones, le escrib铆 una carta a mi padre, despu茅s de dos a帽os sin hablar con 茅l le pedi perd贸n, una carga se fue aquel dia
Desde ese tiempo me siento tranquila, aunque la realidad es que mi padre a煤n vive de su pasado, yo siempre estar茅 esperando por 茅l porque lo amo, porque todos fallamos
De nada vale guardar Rencor, hay mejores cosas que guardar en el ba煤l de nuestro coraz贸n, joyas preciosas como el Amor
Escribir sobre el tema del mes ha sido muy terap茅utico, desprenderse de un sentimiento anclado al coraz贸n, su influencia, comprender el da帽o y lo necesario que es regular nuestras emociones fue muy satisfactorio
English馃枻
Imagen en Pixabay por darksouls1
Resentment馃枻....
馃枻Peace in me goes away, when I remember yesterday,
wounds of the past open in my being,
wounding daggers of yesterday's memory...
that move my life to a dark drama.
馃枻Time has passed, slowly in my being,
poison is running through me
like a dark feeling.
馃枻Resentment that rides freely in my being,
Anchoring my life to murky thoughts.
Greetings to all the kind readers of the Emotions & Feelings Community, wishing you all a Wonderful day filled with much Wellbeing.
This is my entry to the theme for the Month of February RESENTMENT馃尫
Resentment is an emotion caused by memories that are constantly repeated in our thoughts, involving acts committed against us, situations that we consider unjust, which activate in our life anger, disappointment, sadness for the wrongs committed, keeping us away from happiness.
The Presence of Resentment arises when we invest time in remembering the harm caused by a person, a time that brings back negative memories that do more harm to us than to the person who committed the fault.
Hiding behind Resentment is a way of fleeing from the pain caused by the offenses, a wall of defense against a threat, that hides our fragility, a state that leads us to believe that we are strong, however inside us we are broken down, incapacitated before a pain that we do not want to express.
Imagen en pixabay por darksouls1
Resentment being a shield, it is easier for most of us to choose it rather than to forgive, rather than to accept the pain, the sadness, that's why we constantly feed it, we keep it so long, in the end it only harms us with its poison.
To think that resentment makes us stronger is a mistaken idea, if you stop for a moment to reflect you see all that it hides, our inability to resolve past situations, wounds that were never healed, by the insistence to see justice in your favor.
We are all affected at some point by resentment, I have also experienced the ravages of resentment in my life, which interfered with my path to peace of mind long ago.
Imagen en pixabay por darksouls1
Resentment Anchored to me鉂わ笍 驴What produced it?
When you keep resentment, it always breaks a relationship between you and the person who affects you, one of my broken relationships was the link with my father, relationships between parents and children are not so easy, not all misunderstandings are solved, it can take years and the effects of resentment arise.
The emotional wounds caused by that dysfunctional coexistence with my father led me to keep resentment for my father, the traumas of his childhood were transferred to the home, the unjustifiable guilt he felt for having three daughters instead of sons led him to make mistakes, which affected me directly for being his eldest daughter.
My life has not been easy, neither my childhood, until now my father exists unfortunately I do not exist for him, it has been difficult to accept that, however now I do not feel that resentment because I understand that it is a mistake, although it cost me to understand it to heal.
At the beginning I did not understand my father's traumas, that led me to keep resentment, he was a demanding father, absent at the same time, he only appeared to pressure me, to humiliate me, to claim me, he was never there when I needed him, however, I did everything to fill his emptiness, I felt guilty for being a girl instead of a boy, in the end nothing I did was perfect for him, that was a direct damage to my heart, it was unfair to me.
Imagen en pixabay por darksouls1
Those damages made my life anchored to many memories, the dislikes accumulated, I felt despised, abandoned, I didn't have the courage to tell my father how bad I felt, that usually happens when you repress what you feel, including Resentment
Looking into my past now I understand what led me to feel so much resentment: I felt hated instead of loved, in every person this is activated by the offense, although the reasons are different.
Repressed anger
The repressed anger, my inability to face my father, led me to take a negative attitude, rebellious, I could not be near my father, his presence filled my mind with uncomfortable memories, I did not believe in the sincerity of his hugs, I did not want to be near him, I was against him in everything, just to see him upset.
Sometimes we blame a person for the offenses, but if we look beyond that, we also made mistakes that fueled those actions.
When I was 16 years old that resentment grew more because of my father, he cheated on my mother, because of life I found out and everything got worse between him and me, then my mother suffered seeing us in the same house without speaking to each other, thinking about that makes me think that I was just wearing a mask in front of him, I felt depressed, alone I did not talk to anyone about how I felt that situation.
Many times when we harbor resentment we do not want to talk to others about what happened to us, in my case for fear of being judged, that they would not understand me, at that stage it was already hurting me a lot, I was struggling with depression.
Imagen en pixabay por
darksouls1
Emotional Pain
Keeping resentment hurts you more than you can imagine, when it starts to flow it is a poison, it takes you again and again to the memories of the offenses, then the wounds are opened again, they hurt like the first time, they destroy your self-esteem, they lead you to negative feelings.
You feel in your heart a bitterness when you think of that person, of their offenses, when you try to find an answer, a reason for their actions, a bitterness that feeds not only on memories, impotence, anger bind you with chains, then you cry for an offense and you end up crying for memories of your childhood.
Resentment towards our parents is destructive, it generates walls in your mind, it submerges you in conflicts that are not seen, battles from within your being.
At that stage I had already noticed his presence, but I didn't want to let him go, he was a shield for me that hid the emotional pain I felt.
Imagen en pixabay de RondellMelling
You miss out on happiness when you harbor resentment, I lost many years of my father's company, everything would have been different, unfortunately it happened that way.
That bitterness in my heart stagnated many areas of my life, I was filled with mistrust, I remember that there were days that I cried because of the situation with my father, from so much thinking I ended up with a headache.
In the midst of these processes, there was always a thought inside me that I had to stop, I ignored it many times, I knew I had to look for a solution.
Resentment Behind
My stage of searching for healing in my life began when I was 21 years old, after my struggle with depression, I needed to forgive, so my first step was to look for the reason for so much resentment towards my father, to regulate that emotion, to learn to forgive: not only with words but with my heart.
It was very easy for me to choose Resentment as a shield, to let go of it was a little difficult, it was necessary, it was useless to continue clinging to it.
Understanding that Resentment is a situation that you have not solved with yourself allows you to follow the path to understand that you are hurting yourself, that you are the one who feeds that Emotion, that it depends on you how long it stays anchored to your heart, letting go of it leads you to Forgiveness.
Identifying those harmful emotions that feed the Resentment towards my father, the same ones that led me to present a negative attitude, indicated me that I had to change for the better, to make an effort.
Forgiveness is a process that requires effort, that starts from an inner healing, that time was complicated but I did not give up, I CHOSE TO FORGIVE MY FATHER.
I chose to leave resentment behind, a tool I used in those days was to write, to drain in pages my emotions, I wrote a letter to my father, after two years without talking to him I asked him for forgiveness, a burden was gone that day.
Since that time I feel calm, although the reality is that my father still lives from his past, I will always be waiting for him because I love him, because we all failed.
There is no point in holding a grudge, there are better things to keep in the trunk of our heart, precious jewels like Love.
Writing about the theme of the month has been very therapeutic, detaching from a feeling anchored to the heart, its influence, understanding the damage and how necessary it is to regulate our emotions was very satisfying
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