I have lost my mind for the past two months because of what I have went or passed through emotionally. To an extent I couldn't eat food properly, couldn't even think well or straight anymore, let alone to stayed focus in pursuing my goals this year seeing is just two months remaining before the year comes to an end.
Me losing my mind isn't because I was a drug addict or an alcoholic person. I have lost my mind two months ago isn't because I got sacked in my place of work that am managing or thieves broke in and stolen some of my items.
The reason I have lost my mind for over two months was because I felt in love and developed emotional feelings for my best friend girlfriend. Yea, it sounds awkward or bad to you right? Yes, it sounds so pathetic to me myself.
Like how can I have feeling for a lady that my best friend has been dating for two years now. Like what's wrong with me, what's happening to my mind? Why am I having feelings for my best friend girlfriend? Thinking about all these things has made me go crazy and have lost my mind.
What makes it tough for me is how would I get out of it, how would I get control of this emotional feelings am having for my best friend girlfriend? How would I hide this side of my life from my friend and not to tell him what's going on in my mind?.
So, let me tell you guys what happened between my friend girlfriend and I that led to this situation I have found myself into. This is my friend Charles and his girlfriend miracle. Charles and I have been friends for a long time and we are still friends till dates. Charles trusted me so much and introduced me to his girlfriend, her name is Miracle.
She's such a tall and slim beautiful lady and a friendly lady. Miracle and I became friends because Charles wanted me to get close to her so that anytime he is not around I could put my eyes on her and make sure everything is fine in her life.
My friend Charles travelled out of the state, he studied engineering in university of Jos. He told me he will be going to Abuja for an electrical contract work and doesn't know when he will be coming back home. He told me to put an eye on his woman and to be visiting her time to time to make sure she doesn't have any thoughts of having any man in her life because of absence. Charles will called me and whatever he wants to buy a gift for his girlfriend he will talk to me and we will decide on what kind of gift to buy for her and he will send send me the money then I will get the gift and package it and take it to his girlfriend in her house.
This happened so many times and miracle became fun of my constant visitation, she enjoys my company and I enjoyed talking and spending time with her. To me at first am doing it to keep her happy and make sure she doesn't experience boredom since my friend travelled out.
This lady could called me and ask me to visit her and I could said yes am coming in few minutes, without thinking twice about it. This also kept going on and on like this for weeks and I became used to it and fun of it. To an extent I could visit her anytime without telling my friend on the phone I visited her and she won't even told him I visited her either. The lady is a TikTok girl, she like making videos and dancing and because I can dance as well she made me to join her dancing while making her TikTok videos.
Seems am giving her my attentions anytime she wants and the care and shoulder to lead on whenever she's having her menstruation. This has happened we all never thought or knew the kind of bond we are creating is getting stronger and out of limits. I never understand the consequences or the outcome of what I have been doing with my friend girlfriend untill the day I almost lost control of myself and kiss her. Since the day I kiss her I started to avoid her.
On a faithful day my friend Charles called me and complaint miracle his girlfriend has not been calling him regularly again and I have not told him either if she's having a difficult moments or something bad has happened. He doesn't know what is happening to her and me, I supposed to tell him everything that's going on at home concerning his girlfriend and I stopped recently. When he said in two weeks he will be through with the work he went to do and will be coming back home. That's when I came to my senses, feeling angry and jealous that my friend is coming home and he will going to see miracle.
The moment I started having such feeling I knew something is wrong with me, this wasn't me thinking properly and how would I be angry and jealous of my own friend coming home because he will now be visiting his miracle his girlfriend.
I have lost my mind for having such thought, what kind of friend I am. I started to think deep and withdrew myself from giving miracle attention more like before, even if she wants me to visit her if the reason she told me isn't about health challenge I will make an excuse just to avoid visiting her.
I've done this tricks and has helped me regain my mind and conscious back. I noticed when you create an open and friendly zone with an opposite sex, create bonds and give them a constant support and attention, there's a greater possibilities of developing emotional feelings for them. I know now and understood why you hear a man is having affairs with his wife younger sister or wife had affairs with her husband younger brother or friends betraying each other for snatching or having affairs with their spouse. It's because they spend enough time and create a strong bonds with an opposite sex.
I have experience little bit of it and I almost betrayed my friend if I didn't control myself and have a deep thoughts about my mind and conscious. Indeed experience is the best teacher and I've learned to overcome my emotions towards my friend girlfriend.