You sit and think it's all over, you see no reason to live anymore, you are no longer scared of death because it has become your saviour.
Happiness now seem like a mare dictionary term since you don't see the existence anymore. when you turn around you, Joy is no way near. When you go out, nothing at all is making you happy.
Everything in your life has turned a negative phase.
To make the issue worst, no one understands what you are going through, they are all too happy to notice your pain, they are too busy with their daily life activities to notice that you are dying within, and their busy and happy life really comes out strong to Pierce your heart even more, and the worst part is the no one even notice you talk more of noticing that amount of pains they are inflicting on you. But, would you blame them? everyone has their life to live, and everyone has the right to Happiness, who would have thought that their happiness has so much effect on you.
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Then, just then that deadly thought comes into your head. "Just die, and everything would be over." You thought it over and over, your mind unintentionally make it seem like that best solution to everything, you decorate the whole scenario to the point that it now seems like nothing but a knight saving you from all your troubles, then you lay out your plans and start thinking of the possible way to carry it out without any interruption.
Let's stop here for a while, I have some questions for you.
Do you remember all those wonderful plans you had for yourself?
Do you remember that big dream of yours back then?
Do you remember those cute smiles that escapes your lips whenever you imagine living that your big dream?
Do you remember how you promised your self you will make everyone who believed in you proud, you even promised yourself that you will laugh at your haters and prove to them that you are bigger than they thought.
Do you even remember when you still believed that you will get through all these mess one day?
What exactly is going on now? Would dying help you achieve that your big dream, would dying make those who believed in your proud, or would it put your haters to same. Truth be told, it's would be the exact opposite of what you have always promised yourself, is that what you really want?
I don't know how this might sound, but I would still tell you not withstanding. Whatever you are going through currently, someone somewhere is going through something worst and they are still living. Yes, I know that what you feel is unique and it's not good to compare feelings and so on and so on, but, you really need to take a deep breath and rethink your decision. Many people are really going through hell right now, but are making plans of how to break free, why not borrow a lift from them.
Look deep into yourself dear, even no one else does, believe me when I say I truly believe in you and you can defeat all these. Killing yourself only means running away from an issue you can defeat, do you really want that to be the case?
Come on dear, face it head on, you can do this. Life is still long enough to correct it all, achieve it all and finally break free from all of these. It's only a dead person that doesn't have the opportunity to do so, so take advantage of your life and do it.
We really believe in you.