Home is where love grows. It is a sanctuary where bonds are created, memories are shared and cherished. In the heart of every family, love transcends, guiding us through joy and adversity — Princessbusayo
I was at my CDS (Community Development Service) center a month ago where the woman in charge was taking us to a lecture on the topic, "Types of Counselling Relating to Drug Abuse." She mentioned one of them being "Family Counselling" and she started this story which according to her, was a true life story because the family in question came to them for counselling on their only daughter.
The daughter was the only child in the family and was pampered right from the beginning. She was provided with everything she needed until she got to the university and things changed for her. She started going out to clubs, smoking hard drugs and got addicted in the process. Whenever she was at home, she would pretend to be clean, whereas her parents were always fighting and would sit down while watching them.
At the end of the day, something led to another and they saw loads of marijuana and cigarettes in her bags. After investigation, they found out that the girl was a drug lord on campus who would always pretend at home. They brought her to the NDLEA (National Drug Law Enforcement Agency) office which is in charge of curbing individuals with drugs and alcoholic drinks while counselling them with a series of treatments through the help of a therapist.
When the daughter was questioned on why she started such a habit, she said her parents caused it because they were always giving her all she ever wanted without asking about her well-being or how she was coping in school and a lot of time, she is unhappy seeing her parents fighting in the house and when she needed attention and there was no one there, she would go out where she was influenced and introduced to the world of drugs and smoking hard substances. She said there was no love in her family and no one cared.
It took a lot of intervention for the girl to be normal and the family got back together and were living happily again.
Whenever I hear cases of such, I am glad of the kind of family I am in and where I came from. There has not been a time I ever cried or regretted being born into my family because they are a wonderful family whom we have united together in love and never for once turned our backs on each other.
I grew up in a family where they do not believe in beating a woman or apportioning a task for a specific gender with the assertion that the females should be doing this while the males are to be playing around and resting. Everyone in the home has their responsibilities which they must perform whether you are a boy or girl, young or old, no one was left out of the equation and love was shared equally among us.
I never experienced a time when my father raised his hand to beat my mother as peace reigned in the home. Misunderstandings will surely occur between husbands and wives but I learnt something from my mother to always keep quiet and be patient when talking to my Dad.
Wherever I go and am lucky to see some families where all they know is to fight all the time, not paying attention to their kids as they wander around the street like sheep without its shepherd, I am always proud of my family and the love we have made to grow among us.
This is something my late Grandmother had always wanted. Coming from an amazing home would be an understatement for me because I have been surrounded by loving people who make up my family and I feel fulfilled and joyful to have such a great relationship that has shaped my life since birth.
Those who are born into a dysfunctional family, when they see a family like mine or other people who have chosen to stay happy and peaceful with themselves would wish to have such a wonderful family. Just like an author of a book titled "The Subtle Art of Not Giving A Fuck" said, it is not one's fault to be in a situation but it becomes your responsibility to choose which to go for. Same with a dysfunctional family, it isn't your fault to be part of such a family but it becomes your responsibility to do what is right, choosing whether to make a change for good or leave it like that.
Every time, I am filled with awe and appreciative of the fact that I came from a good family who chose love, peace and unity over hatred, resentment and sadness and this is something that has kept us moving forward and succeeding in our endeavours while also celebrating everyone's achievements. In my family, we have a standard we have stood on and that is when it goes well for one person, it works well for the other and it doesn't mean everyone shouldn't work extra hard to give themselves the best life ever. There is no form of envy or mistrust among us.
It is only in a family that doesn't seek peace among themselves that would create hatred, jealousy and fighting and will always look for the downfall of the other person. Family is great and when you have one that shows unconditional love to you, cherish and celebrate them all the time.
This is my entry to Day 15 May Inleo Monthly Initiative. If you are looking to participate, you can jump on it now by clicking the link below for more instructions.
May Inleo Monthly Calendar
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