Throughout my life, I have proudly identified as a "girl's girl," always striving to support and uplift the women around me. My commitment goes beyond defending my friends; I aim to champion any woman who seeks my support. About a month ago, I shared my side business in fashion design with some acquaintances, and two of them expressed genuine interest in collaborating. One of them mentioned having a small travel-sized bag full of fabrics and asked if I could sew trousers for women. I agreed; sewing women's trousers is one of my preferred styles anyway; it is even my go-to style for everyday wear.
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The other woman, however, never made a specific request; she only said that she would like me to sew for her in the future and asked me to let her know when my machines were ready. At the time, I was a corper serving in a different state from where my machine was. But then, I told her I would inform her when I was ready.
When my sewing machine arrived, I informed them that I was ready to start taking orders. On that very day, the first woman, whom I’ll refer to as "A," began conversing with another designer in my very presence. This designer, also a fellow corps member, was busy taking measurements for another customer. Without any prompting, A approached her, inquiring about her prices and negotiating what she wanted to have made for her.
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For context, A sells jewelry and fabrics, mainly Ankara and Kampala. As a fashion designer myself, I buy fabrics for my clients, so I know that her prices are exorbitantly high—sometimes two to three times higher. While A was advertising her clothes and jewelry to us, I told her that I was broke but I would patronize her, and I eventually did. To my surprise, A went to my husband and asked, or rather demanded, that he buy things for me, implying that I was being stingy. Thankfully, my husband saw through that tactic and turned her down.
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When the jewelry arrived, I immediately saw through them; they were fake and the type to fade within a couple of weeks to a month. Nevertheless, I bought an overpriced anklet, paying six times the normal price of an original anklet, just to support her as a fellow woman, and this was someone that couldn't patronize me because she feels I might not be good enough.
She even admitted to it by telling me, she feels I am too religious and I might just decide not to sew certain styles for her, she doesn't want unnecessary judgements from me so she is patronising someone else, I have never even tried to judge her, how could I when she has never patronised me. Just reliving this whole thing is just getting me more angry.
It saddens me how women would rather team up with other women rather than supporting one another. I remain committed to uplifting women and their endeavors, but I sincerely wish more women would adopt this mindset. My success does not diminish yours; together, we can thrive. As women, we can do better shaa.
See you all next time!