Society thinks men shouldn't cry, men can survive anything, men should never act or look weak, men must provide, society has said a lot. Some women on the other hand have decided to put men in misery just because they are called men. One of the ways of doing so is using them in the guise of a romantic relationship. They have made them victims of really disastrous heartbreaks and do not even see it as a big deal. I have heard cases of a man doing so much for a lady and out of the blue she got married while still in a relationship with him. Some women naturally feel entitled to a lot of things just because they are in a relationship. They begin to feel like the man is responsible for everything that has to do with their wellbeing. This issue is a wide one and goes both ways meaning that men have also used women too but today I want to talk about the men.

Because nobody often talks about issues that go in the favour of men.

Rule 1: Do not invest in a woman that you do not have a long term commitment with.

Some men in a bid to please their partner or show them how much they love them, they just go ahead and try to do whatever their partner wants. It is unhealthy to just begin a relationship with a lady and go ahead and invest in her in so many areas. Let's assume you are a man and your partner is looking for a skill to learn. She said she wants to learn how to sew so you gave her money for the training and even bought her a sewing machine, why? That's too much!
There should be a certain level of commitment before you'll be doing things like this.

Am I saying a man shouldn't support his girlfriend? Of course not!

It's okay to assist her with a little money, contribute, you can even help to link her up to a good fashion designer or someone you know will charge her less. It still shows you're supportive. She's not your wife! She's your girlfriend. Do not take full responsibility for her. Don't sponsor her entire education, you're not her father or mother. You can contribute. It's because men sometimes do too much in a relationship that's why they get so hurt after a breakup then you hear things like"After all I did for you?

Rule 2: Do not carry her family's responsibilities

Sometimes a man in a bid to maintain a good reputation and seem responsible in the eyes of the family of the woman he's in love with decides to share in the responsibilities. As a man, you want to pay for the younger sister's school fee, you want to assist in paying the rent, you want to buy them groceries, they have a family wedding and you want to contribute, do not do that! You have no business there! As long as there's no wedding plans in the picture, the relationship is between you and the lady for the time being. Once you begin to extend this unnecessary generosity to the family, they begin to have expectations. What if you don't have the money to support the next time? It is very wrong to be doing so much. You'll end up looking very stupid if someday the relationship comes to an end.

Rule 3: Deprive her of her wants sometimes.

It is wrong for a man to always do as a lady says! She asks for a Gucci bag today, you buy it! She says she wants a change of apartment, you pay for it! She says she wants to go on a vacation, you make it happen! Everything she wants, you get it done. That's unwise.
Deprive her of things you know she wants but they can wait. Unless it's a need, meaning it's essential and it's urgent and it's a matter of life and death then you can succumb but if it's not something that's needed immediately, it is okay to deprive her sometimes. That's how to train a woman to be patient and you train her mind to be powerful. If you don't deprive her, you end up spoiling her. If you don't train her, she'll cross her boundaries.

Rule 4: If gestures aren't reciprocated, let go.

Some ladies have divine grace to receive things. All they do is receive! Giving is not in their plan. Men, look out for these kinds of women and avoid them. Relationship is a two way thing, it's like a partnership. Two people are supposed to make the efforts, work towards the sustainability of the relationship, please the other and not the other way round. Especially if you're looking forward to getting married to this lady, if she's not generous too, if she doesn't make sacrifices as well, if she doesn't reciprocate gestures please let go. Don't keep making all the sacrifices, don't keep doing all the loving, you'll be drained.

I know that this post was strictly addressed to men but this advice goes both ways. Ladies take note as well. Save yourself from too much ache, do not waste your time with an unworthy person. Hopefully I'll be back with a piece specifically for the ladies. Let love lead!

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