Hello Silverbloggers it's been a minute😃
You know when you just sit and think about your life and wonder what you're going to be in the next 30 to 40 years, where you’re going to be, how you're going to be, and how it's going to be for you, you sigh and just have to trust the process.
I saw my Aunt today, after many years we decided to have lunch together and catch up since she just came into the same city that I live in, I was so happy to see her, we both embraced ourselves and went down memory lane. While staring at her I could see all the signs of old age on her, I could see how frail she had become, my once active and vibrant Aunt had become really weak, I could see her struggling to do stuff that she was so swift to do before and listening to her talk about how lonely she was broke my heart.
You know that moment we move from babies to adults and we all start to leave our parent's house? The first child leaves and our parents celebrate that their child is doing well, the second child leaves and it's a double celebration as they become really proud of their children and they do not hide their excitement. The third child leaves and they can now proudly beat their chest that their kids are working really hard, and their kids now have enough money to rent an apartment of their own and start a family there.
This cycle continues and before we know it we are all out of our parents house and it begins to hit our parents that they are all alone.
The noise and laughter that once graced the various rooms of the house are replaced by total silence, the heated arguments, quarrels, and sibling fights that had to be settled amicably are absent, and the large quantities of food that was usually prepared for the full house and was served with so many plates and bowls is long gone and replaced with little quantities of food and just a few plates.
Our parents lives begin to change and we can't help but feel a certain way for them. While some would want to move in with their children others would love to stay back in their "Homes" and over here elderly homes are not so effective and as such isn’t a valid option.
Looking at my Aunt, my heart went out to my father who is a widower and is living with my younger brother who is just about to finish college.
I couldn't help but think about what is going to happen after my brother finishes college, gets a job, and is about to start his life somewhere else. My father is hell-bent on staying in his house.
I really don't know how all of these works but I don't think I am mentally prepared to see my dad grow frail and not be able to do a lot of stuff by himself that is, he moves from being independent to depending on someone else, I am not ready to see him eat certain things and don't eat others because of his health condition, I am not ready to see my father go in for multiple check-ups. When I heard he was sick a few weeks ago it broke me, seeing and hearing your father in pain is a big nut to crack.
I keep wondering, does age prepare one for all of these? I pray for long life and good health for my father but there are some things that just happen naturally.
Will I get better as the day goes by? will I learn to adapt to the new changes that will begin to occur in his life? Will I be able to look at my once vibrant father become frail as the day goes by? Will I be able to live with the knowledge that my Papa is actually becoming really old?
While thinking of all of these I couldn't help but think about my life too, someday I also will become old, I will become a granny, I will send off my children to their new homes, what's gonna happen to me by then?
So basically the whole idea of this post was just to think out loud. I am open to all advice or counsel from you all.😃😃
All images are mine except otherwise stated.
Thanks for stopping by
Loads of Love🥰🥰
XOXO