If it's one of my lecturers in school he will always say. “You will always be a mumu until you get sense”
Back in the days when I have multiple friends. I'm always in a rush to go to their house to play but slowly my parents began to notice it and each time they kept asking. “Those of your friends that you visit, why can't they visit you. Why are you always visiting them”
I will say my experience of childhood was kind of different because I was an introvert, I love keeping to myself and when I make friends I give it my all. I select my friends like sieve but there was this particular girl, we have been good friends but now distance.
I admire everything she had and wish I could even have more. We did some business together and it was through her I learnt some business strategies but then she always loved inviting me to occasions.
I frequently her place while she's not even concerned to know mine, her birthday we plan it together and when it comes to her family events/ occasions I will always be there to give her my support then comes a time when I invited her to mine and she failed to honor it and that was the beginning of the long distance.
Our friendship taught me a bitter lesson each time I remember. I will be like why didn't I say no to her. The reason is always clear, just so I won't hurt her feelings or just so I won't lose our friendship but not anymore. Then I was scared of losing my friends because I didn't want to feel lonely, I didn't want to be tagged an introvert. I just want to be among people they call a group of friends and yeah I was unaware I was in the midst of fake friends who didn't care and my fear became my reality not too soon.
Most people are in a group of friends they value so much but come to think of it. Have you asked yourself if your friend values you too?
It is not about the vibe or going over the flow but giving your support and hoping it gets returned in your own time.
I cherish friendship but never being in a friendship that will lead me astray. Ever since I learnt how to say no by the help of some books that have boosted my confidence. It is so easy to say no to anybody without any care in the world about whether it hurts your feelings or not.
Putting myself first has been the game and it's really been working. We lose friends and we make friends every stage of the way. Though I haven't made friends that smoke, so no pressure on someone teaching me how to smoke.