¿Quien en esta vida no ha cometido errores? Conversando con un buen amigo, hablábamos de los errores que vemos cometer a un grupo de personas, que nos suplantaron en puestos de liderazgo que mi amigo y yo desempeñamos por años. Mi amigo, sin embargo, quedó con ciertas responsabilidades ligadas a estas personas, pero no a logrado tener una buena relación con ellos, porque menosprecian la experiencia que el tiene y no escuchan su consejo, lo cual les a llevado a cometer varios errores.
Making a mistake doesn't mean you've failed
Who hasn't made mistakes in life? I was talking to a good friend about the errors we've seen a group of people make. They replaced us in leadership positions that my friend and I held for years. My friend still has some responsibilities tied to these people, but he hasn't been able to build a good relationship with them because they undervalue his experience and don't listen to his advice, which has led them to make several mistakes.
El ha adoptado la actitud de hacerse a un lado y cumplir solamente con lo que el cree le compete, pero no deja de pensar que esos errores también le puede afectar y que la nueva gestión sea vista como un fracaso y eso manchen su reputación. Ese sentimiento a comenzado a agobiarlo y la culpa se ha hecho presente, pero al no ser escuchado se siente de manos atadas, por eso ha buscado mi consejo y junto a el analice un par de cosas.
He's adopted a hands-off approach, only doing what he thinks is his job, but he can't help but think that these mistakes could also affect him and that the new management might be seen as a failure, which could tarnish his reputation. That feeling has started to weigh on him, and he's been feeling guilty, but since no one listens to him, he feels powerless. That's why he came to me for advice, and together we analyzed a couple of things.
Le invite a que juntos buscáramos la definición de culpa y vergüenza, llegando a la conclusion que la culpa es aquello que nos hace sentir responsables de algo que hicimos o dejamos de hacer y la vergüenza es aflicción emocional por alguna falla. Le decía que desde mi punto de vista ambas son parte de nuestra naturaleza, pero llegan afectarnos severamente cuando las llevamos al extremo, que se cuidara de no hacerlo a raíz de lo que estaba viviendo.
I suggested that we look up the definitions of guilt and shame. We concluded that guilt is what makes us feel responsible for something we did or didn't do, and shame is emotional distress caused by some failure. I told him that, in my opinion, both are part of our nature but can become a serious problem when taken to the extreme. I warned him to be careful not to let what he was going through push him to that point.
Mi recomendación fue que lo mas antes posible despejara de su corazón tales sentimientos, porque un fallo muy común que todos cometemos al comenzar a sentirnos de tal manera, es comenzar a llamar fracaso a el error. El como parte de esta nueva gestión, debía hacer mucho énfasis en cómo corregir los errores cometidos a fin de no repetirlos, pero que jamás por nada del mundo tildara tales reveses como fracasos, porque son dos cosas muy distintas para mi, saber separarlas nos alivia la culpa y vergüenza.
My recommendation was that he clear his heart of those feelings as soon as possible because a very common mistake we all make when we start feeling this way is to call a mistake a failure. As part of this new management, he needed to focus on how to correct the mistakes that had been made so they wouldn't be repeated, but he should never, ever label those setbacks as failures. For me, they're two very different things, and knowing how to separate them relieves guilt and shame.
El problema de los errores es que pocas veces sabemos cómo afrontar la información que nos ofrecen, porque son exactamente eso, informacion, nada mas, algo de lo que hicimos o ejecutamos no estaba bien y fallamos, entonces el error es un dato y punto. El desafío esta en comprenderlo y verlo como un aprendizaje, ya sabemos que ocasiona el error y no lo incluimos en nuestro próximo intento, siempre y cuándo sea posible.
The problem with mistakes is that we rarely know how to deal with the information they provide because that's exactly what they are: information. Nothing more. It means that something we did or performed wasn't right and we failed. So, a mistake is just a fact. The challenge is to understand it and see it as a learning opportunity. Now that we know what causes the mistake, we don't include it in our next attempt, whenever possible.
Asociar el error con el fracaso es signo de frustración, por eso aconseje a mi amigo que aquellos errores de los que era testigo, entendiera que eran causa del accionar por la falta de capacitación de la nueva gestión. Que su frustración por no ser reconocido e incluido, le estaba conduciendo a la malinterpretación, confundiendo el error como fracaso y si no se cuidaba el sentimiento de culpa y vergüenza iba a crecer, debía parar, hacer su parte, evaluar y continuar, cada quien tiene su oportunidad de rectificar, a ellos les tocará.
Associating a mistake with failure is a sign of frustration, so I advised my friend to understand that the mistakes he was witnessing were caused by the new management's lack of training. His frustration at not being recognized or included was leading him to misinterpret things, confusing a mistake with a failure. If he wasn't careful, his feelings of guilt and shame would grow. He needed to stop, do his part, evaluate, and move on. Everyone has a chance to make things right, and it's their turn now.
Imágenes creadas con la IA Copilot