“Babe calm down”, John my partner said softly.
“I should calm down? You impose all these rules on me and you’re asking me to calm down?” I asked confused.
“Don’t look at it that way please” John said.
“Please tell me how else I’m supposed to look at it. I try my best to be the kind of woman that you want, I try to be your “spec” against all odds, but what do you do John? What do you do to be the kind of man that I want?”
“Babe…”
“I thought as much, please shut the door on your way out”.
I mustered all the courage in the world and immediately left the sitting room to my room not allowing John to see me break down because of him.
I wept bitterly that day like I had lost everything, of course, I had lost my world, John was the only man that I truly loved and I just lost him.
I lay down on my bed and reminisced on all the good memories we had shared and fresh tears filled my eyes again.
I thought so hard about why John bombarded me with so many “don’ts”, “Don’t eat too much”, “Don’t laugh like that” Don’t! Don't! Don't”!
Dating John felt like walking on thin ice, being too careful not to break his rules, and in the process I lost myself.
I am a very funny and jovial person but John slowly made me a shadow of myself, it felt like I was playing another character in my life and the role didn’t fit me.
Love was supposed to be fun and sweet not a do or die affair.
I continued to sob in my big but lonely house and my dog the only recipient of my outburst. Feeling a banging headache I quickly searched the first aid box for some painkillers and just when I was about to take the painkillers my best friend’s call came in.
“Hi, baby!” I heard Kim scream over the phone.
“Hello Kim”, I replied softly trying so hard to sound fine.
“You are not going to believe who I just saw now girl!” Kim sounded so excited, and such excitement of hers could only mean that she had the latest gossip.
“Who did you see please?” I said, not in the mood for Kim’s gossip.
“Baby girl I saw Cassie and her new boyfriend, the one that she is always gushing about that pays her bills and gives her money, Babe! it’s the other way round as it's Cassie that gives this dude money and I just couldn't believe my eyes.”
I stopped Kim right in her tracks before she could continue as I wasn’t ready for any form of gossip.
“Kim, not today please”, I said before sobbing again.
“Shantel, what is it? what is wrong with you?”, Kim panicked.
“I am fine Kim but I am not just ready to hear any of your stories”, I said before breaking down completely over the phone.
“I am on my way Shantel, I will be there in 20 minutes, just hang in there for a little while”. With that, Kim hung up and I was back in my lonely big house again and sobbing uncontrollably.
“Stop crying Shantel”, I heard a voice speak my mother tongue.
I took a look at my house to trace where the voice was coming from but I couldn’t find anything.
“John is a jerk and I never liked him anyway”, I heard the voice loud and clear again. “Am I beginning to hear things?“ I asked myself. The fact that I was beginning to go crazy intensified my pain and I couldn’t help but hate myself.
“Calm down Shantel, he is just a man, you will find another one soon and…”
“The blood of Jesus Christ! Holy ghost fire! Jesus!”,
I screamed and ran out of my room when I heard my dog speak in my mother tongue not once but four times.
“Oh No! No! I have lost it, I am beginning to hear things, and of all things to hear is my dog speaking my mother tongue and comforting me?”
I opened the door quietly and I saw Riley my dog sitting innocently, I disregarded every thought and I walked back into the room and Riley was happy and was wagging his tail.
“Shantel as I said earlier everything is going to be fine”, with the speed of light I ran out of my house and locked the door. I wasn’t seeing or hearing things, Riley my dog spoke to me, not just in English but in my mother tongue Okrika.
I stood outside until Kim arrived, I recounted the whole incident to her and she laughed over it like I was crazy. She didn’t wait to listen to the remaining part of my crazy story before going into my room to hear Riley talk for herself.
Kim stayed in my room for about 30 minutes and Riley did not say a word. Kim concluded that I had cried enough and was hearing things.
I sat down with Kim in my room, forgetting all the issues I had with John, I focused on how my dog could magically talk or if I was gradually going insane because I was heartbroken.
I have been staring at my dog for a couple of minutes and he keeps giving me the cute face that I find irresistible.
I am torn between giving Riley out as a gift to Kim or embracing his special gift as a dog, I pray I make the right decision as both options have consequences.
All Images are mine except otherwise stated.