I grew up without a spoon in my hand, and the silver spoon was only a fairy tale that I dared not dream of or aspire to own. We have been living in the community where I grew up since 1993, and suffice it to say that my mom and I were among the colonists of the area, going to farms, felling trees for firewood, and harvesting corn for lunch or dinner. Despite my humble beginnings, I had my academics to face and compete favorably with kids of the elite. My older brothers were partly around but always handy. We ate from the same pot, and I was carried along wherever they went. All we had was ourselves; we didn't expect or wait for any rich uncle from anywhere. Thankfully, the lastborn came and happened to be the only female among the five children of my mom. We lived such a life, all for one and one for all.
I remember one of my older brothers being dragged unjustly to the police station for a false allegation against another of my brothers. The family was exonerated, but we showed how much we were willing to stand and sacrifice for another, yet again, all for one and one for all. Our parents made us realize we did not have the abundance of other children, and we needed to work harder than the average child to favorably compete.
How would you explain the child of a non-university staff member becoming the head boy in a school where the children of lecturers dominated? I knew I studied with the privileged, and I needed to up my game, which I devoted myself to. Eventually, beyond being the head prefect of the school, I was the first runner-up in the national common entrance at the state level. Thus, my inadequacy and unprivileged background make me, again, the only student admitted to the gifted academy from my school. Then, I knew I could excel beyond my obvious limitations whenever I set my mind to achieve greatness.
Two major things I would love to pass on to my kids are the value of the family bond and breaking ground beyond obvious limitations. It is often said that we can reach as far as our eyes can see. This means we can aim higher and farther, even when at a spot. There is always a new horizon to see and a new ground to break. I am not after giving my children silver spoons, but I'll give them a fair playing field with a disclosure of how difficult things were in my time. Times are changing and different, no doubt, but it is my intention to make sure they value little and humble beginnings and learn to support one another as siblings.
I'll maintain my gratitude for my humble and optimistic upbringing. One major factor I would not make the mistake of passing on to my child(ren) is the toxic environment in which I grew up. I agree that civilization and religion have gradually abolished many lifestyles, but a significant number of us grew up either in polygamous homes, under separated parents, or sometimes in different religious settings. Most of these scenarios created negative thoughts in our childhood, and for me, I swear never to let my children be subjected to any of the aforementioned. The innocent child should enjoy the comfort of being a child and not suffer the complications of some adults who took the wrong steps. An ideal environment to thrive for any child improves the psychology and approach to life for such kids.
Thank you for reading. I would love to have your comments and contributions.