There are very few things in this life that can humble a person faster than sickness.
And I don't even know how this is possible. One minute I'm convincing myself it's just body aches, the next minute, sore throat comes knocking. And for some reason, my body’s favorite way to remind me that I’m not invincible is by gifting me a lovely dose of malaria. It's almost like it's trying to say, "Just because you're AA doesn't make you special", lol.
But as much as I hate malaria itself, what I truly, deeply, completely, utterly, indisputably and passionately despise are malaria drugs. ughh.
First of all, the smell? Eww. Honestly, it’s giving mosquito repellent. It’s giving chemical warfare. It’s giving the very essence of the parasite itself bottled up in tablet form.
I have a theory, malaria drugs don’t actually cure malaria; their scent is just so revolting that the malaria parasite packs its bags and leaves out of sheer disgust. I’d argue that the smell alone could be patented as an insecticide. Forget mosquito coils; just crush a malaria tablet and leave it out, problem solved. You'll repel both insects and humans.
And don’t even get me started on the taste. Bitter doesn’t even begin to describe it. The bitterness makes you question your will to actually even stay alive. I’ve tried everything, swallowing it fast, drinking gallons of water, stuffing my mouth with something sweet immediately after, but somehow, the bitterness will still crawl up one's throat. Especially, if you burp right after, ugh, MISERY. I swear, these drugs were designed to punish us.
But the real villain in all of this? PCM injections.
Now, listen, I know injections are supposed to help and are actually faster (talk about being superheroes), but why is nobody talking about how painful PCM injections are?
I walked into that hospital, weak and miserable, thinking I was about to get some relief, only to be ambushed by a pain so intense I nearly saw my ancestors. And did the nurse warn me? No oh. Did she lovingly prepare me for the horror about to unfold? Absolutely not.
Instead, she just smiled, asked me to relax (as if that was possible), and to be fair, I dind't even realize when the needle went in (she was that good) but oh trust me, immediately that PCM entered my body? I knew it. I felt the suffering. Nobody told me that for a full minute, I’d lose all control of the side they injected. Nobody told me I’d have to sit there, gripping the hospital bed, questioning whether I’d ever walk again. (seriously, I questioned if she'd touched a nerve and I was getting paralyzed).
Why? Why is this information not common knowledge? If they had told me beforehand, at least I could have mentally prepared. But no, they let me walk in blind, and now I’m traumatized. I am never taking another PCM injection in my entire life again. Apparently, oily constituents being injected into the body are generally more painful. As from now on, before getting injected, I must check the constituents, if it's oily, maybe they'll have to place me under anesthesia before injecting because nope, not under my conscious watch will or can I do it again.
In conclusion, being sick is a scam, malaria drugs smell like punishment, and PCM injections should come with a trigger warning. Next time malaria tries to creep up on me, I might just negotiate with the virus instead of taking those tablets. Because at this point? I’m convinced the cure is worse than the disease.
lol, we've come to the end of my dramatic rant. Thank you for sticking around.